What to Do When He Doesn’t Text You Back: Advice You Won’t Like

You texted yesterday, you texted him this morning, you texted this afternoon—no reply. To keep your sanity, know what to do when he doesn’t text you back.

what to do when he doesn't text you back

We’ve all been there. Even though I know what to do, sometimes I become so overwhelmed with emotion, I start freaking out. I want to know why he isn’t texting me back—what did I do? Do I text him again? So, if you think you’re the only person who struggles with the whole what to do when he doesn’t text you back concept, you’re not alone. Even I suffer from this.

What to do when he doesn’t text you back

Listen, what I’m going to tell you, you need to do. I know you’re going to want to do the opposite, no one wants to listen to this type of advice because they think it’s counterproductive. But trust me on this, you cannot let your emotions take control or else you fall into a deep hole of desperation. That hole isn’t easy to get out of.

I hate to say it, but there will be one guy that doesn’t text you back.

#1 Put your phone down. Put your phone down. In fact, turn off your internet and phone. You’re going to make bad decisions if you keep staring at it. Do not creep him on social media or see when he was last online. This won’t help the situation.

We all know he read your message, we all know he’s not replying. So, reminding yourself of this isn’t going to help. [Read: The 12 things you must do to stop obsessing over someone]

#2 Don’t make any assumptions. You probably already think of all the reasons as to why he’s not messaging you. Maybe he’s busy, maybe he’s at work, maybe he’s not interested. Listen, there could be countless reasons as to why he’s not replying. You don’t know why he’s not replying, so jumping to conclusions will not help this situation.

#3 Do NOT text him. If you leave him a stream of messages, it’s not a good look. I know you feel vulnerable because he’s not replying. If you message him again, you look like you’re losing.

When he sees that you’re trying and trying to get him, he won’t take you seriously. So, take a breath and lean back. You need to show him that you’re as cool as a cucumber. Plus, if he doesn’t reply to you, it’s his loss.  [Read: Double texting and second texts: 6 basic rules to play it cool]

#4 If you MUST text him, wait 24 hours, minimum. I know not texting him is probably killing you, so if you feel that you must text him, promise me to wait 24 hours. Please. I’m begging you. Maybe your text didn’t actually sound like it needed a response which is fine. So, if he hasn’t texted you, wait 24 hours and then send him a text. If he still doesn’t reply, well, then it’s clear that he’s not interested.

#5 Distract yourself. During this period, if you’re not busy, you’ll go insane. I understand why—you really like this guy! The least he could do is just reply to your stupid text! But the reality is, he’s not replying. So, while you wait for him to reply, keep yourself busy. Go out with your friends, work, study—keep going with your life. [Read: Why did he stop texting you? 13 ruled you HAVE to follow]

#6 Accept he doesn’t like you the way he needs to. Listen, if he replies hours later and says, “Sorry, I forgot to reply” is that someone you honestly want to be with? Someone who forgets to write you back? If you like someone, you never forget to write them when they text you. Come on, girl, I know you like him, but he’s not nearly as into you as he needs to be. [Read: Trust me, he’s probably not into you – 20 signs that don’t lie]

#7 Don’t tell everyone. I know you want to bitch about it with people, but don’t go telling everyone. If you have mutual friends, someone is going to end up telling him what you’re saying about him. Sure, you can ask someone about him and what he thinks about you, but if you go around talking to people, they’re going to notice. Keep it cool.

#8 Don’t post this on social media. Do not post some passive aggressive Facebook status, saying how you wish people would just be honest with their emotions. If he isn’t texting you, he’s showing you he’s not interested. Posting these things on social media makes you look immature when really, he’s the one that needs to grow up. [Read: 8 annoying social media users that make you want to scream]

#9 Do not wait for him. You may think that he’s going to come around, that you just need to show him how great you are. Listen, if he doesn’t see how great you are, f*ck him. He cannot even be bothered to write you back, so, stop wasting your time on him.

#10 Focus on your self-respect. You may feel a little sting in your heart now that you’ve put yourself out there and he didn’t go for it. I’ve been there. Hell, I flew to Australia and got rejected by the guy who lived there. Yeah, I was head over heels for him. So, you can imagine how cringe-worthy that was.

Point is, once something like this happens, you can be sad. However, you need to push forward. Don’t get angry at him, don’t bad mouth him on social media, instead, keep it classy. [Read: How self-respect affects you and your relationship]

#11 Don’t try to talk to him in person. I know you want to know why he didn’t reply to you. Some of you probably think, well, I’m going to walk up to him tomorrow and ask him why. Don’t. I mean, you can, but there’s no need.

There is actually no point. You need to understand that he gave you his answer by not replying. What you need to do is accept the reality of the matter.

[Read: 20 reasons why he doesn’t like me back]

Now that you know what to do when he doesn’t text you back, do not go and do the opposite. I know you want to, but trust me, it only makes things worse.

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Natasha Ivanovic
Natasha Ivanovic is an intimacy, dating, and relationship writer best known for her writings on Kiiroo, LovePanky, Post Pravda, and more. She's the creator and ...
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