20 Signs He’s Pretending Not to Like You But He’s Slowly Falling for You

Your intuition is screaming that a guy is crushing on you, but he won’t admit it. Learn the signs he’s pretending not to like you and catch him in the act!

signs he's pretending not to like you

You have instinct. Everyone has instinct. It’s the inner voice inside of us, telling us the truth. Has a guy told you he doesn’t like you, or has he been behaving like you both are just friends? But somewhere inside, do you feel like you’re seeing the subtle signs he’s only pretending not to like you when he really does?

Maybe you and this guy have been hanging out, and though you like him, he’s not giving back what you want. But you feel there’s some attraction between you. And those feelings aren’t just made up.

If you see the signs he’s pretending not to like you, then he probably is falling for you and doesn’t want to come clean.

If you want to know for sure before you show your own interest *assuming you are interested*, it’s a good idea to see if he’s really NOT into you or he’s pretending not to like you. If it’s the latter, what’s holding him back? [Read: Mutual sexual tension – 44 signs, causes and secrets to know if you’re both attracted to each other]

Why do guys hold back even if they like a girl?

Let’s be honest, sometimes guys can be strange creatures! They want to tell you how they feel but there’s something stopping them from doing it. You know what that is? Pride. Or more like fear!

He’s terrified that you’re going to knock him back and that will hurt his pride in a big way. Instead, he pretends you’re nothing special to him and hopes it will all go away.

Either that, or he hopes that you’ll somehow psychically pick up on his reverse psychology and ask him out instead. Yes, you’re supposed to be a mind reader too!

Of course, it could also be that this guy had a bad experience in the past and he’s not keen to recreate it. Maybe he just needs a little time to build up his courage once more.

Either way, learning to recognize the signs he’s pretending not to like you when he really does will help you to work out what’s really going on. [Read: Does he like you? All the subtle signs to decode a guy’s feelings for you]

Signs he’s pretending not to like you when he really does

Let’s be honest, it happens to the best of us. Most of us have been in a situation where we liked someone, but, for whatever reason, we put our emotions to the side and squash any chance of hooking up.

Maybe this is an ex of your friend, or, in your head, you think this person isn’t your type *which isn’t a good excuse at all, by the way*.

Never mind that they showed interest, you dodged them even though you didn’t want to. Most of us have encountered a situation like this before.

Yet, the shoe is on the other foot now. After having a taste of your own medicine, it doesn’t feel that great, right? If anything, it’s making you lose your mind.

Some guys are pretty good actors, but these are the sure signs he’s pretending not to like you, when he, in fact, does like you very much!

1. He spends a lot of time with you

No one will waste their time with someone they don’t like. You have friends, right? They spend time with you because they like you for who you are. So, at least, on the most basic level, this guy likes who you are.

But let’s be honest, if you have this feeling he’s into you, and he’s spending a lot of time with you – he likes you. [Read: How to decode his body language and figure out if he likes you]

2. It feels like you’re a couple

Most people confuse your friendship for a relationship. When you’re around each other, there’s a level of comfort you share that doesn’t exist with your other male friends.

This relationship feels different. Maybe you are more touchy and affectionate, and if that’s the case, well, there has to be feelings involved.

3. He makes the odd mistake to show you how he really feels

Though he’s pretending not to like you, he’s going to slip up. It’s impossible to hide emotions like that. So, he’ll like your social media posts, or text you frequently. And the messages don’t need to be flirtatious in nature, but it shows that you’re on his mind a lot.

Focus on what he does because his actions can tell you everything you need to know. This is one of the major signs he’s pretending not to like you even when he does like you, so pay attention! [Read: The sneakiest ways to get a guy to ask you out]

4. He blows hot and cold

Ah, yes. The mixed signals. This is why you’re reading this. You have the feeling he likes you, but his actions are all over the place.

If he’s acting too nice or showing too much of himself, he’ll suddenly switch and become very cold and withdrawn. This hot and cold behavior may show that he’s into you, but it also shows he’s not sure what he wants. [Read: The 3 stages to explain why someone blows hold and cold constantly]

5. He tries to get to know you

If a guy doesn’t like you, he’s not going to waste his time asking personal questions. Why would he? It doesn’t make sense.

He doesn’t want to get to know you; he wants to either get into your pants and bail or end the conversation entirely. He’s not going to invest his time in getting to know you on a deeper level.

6. He’s all about eye contact

We’re always focusing on someone’s words when really, we should pay attention to their actions. When you’re together with other friends or at a party, you always seem to catch him staring at you.

And it’s not just a glance, he’s really looking at you. You know we only look at things we like, right? Well… unless it’s a train wreck, but that’s not you. If you’re looking for signs he’s pretending not to like you and he’s making regular eye contact, consider that a sign he really is interested in you! [Read: 25 signs your guy friend is falling for you even if he’s trying to hide it]

7. He’s quiet about other women

When a guy is into you, they’re not going to talk about other women in front of you. Okay, maybe he will make you jealous.

But if he really likes you, he’s not going to talk about any other girl he finds attractive. Even if he’s pretending not to like you, he’ll keep that side of him on the down-low. [Read: 30 peculiar signs to look for when a guy likes you]

8. He gets jealous

Everyone gets jealous; it’s very hard to control unless you’re really focusing on it. And even then, it’s easy to spot a jealous person.

Maybe he sees a guy flirting with you or asking you out, and you can’t help but see his body language and attitude change when he sees that. He’ll stare, maybe become a little cold, even insult the guy. And if that happens, he’s jealous, and is clearly a sign he’s pretending not to like you when he really does.

9. He’s very touchy

When you two are together, he’s always sitting close to you, touching you, giving you hugs. What is this? Guys aren’t going to throw themselves onto just anyone.

Body language is a huge indicator of someone’s feelings. The closer he tries to get to you, the more he likes you. It’s that simple. [Read: How to tell if a guy likes you – 75 of the biggest signs to know for sure]

10. His friends know their limits

When you’re hanging out with him and his friends, it’s quite clear they have boundaries around you. His friends aren’t trying to hit on you or start a flirtatious conversation.

If you notice that, then he’s already told his friends to back off. He may also keep you away from his friends out of fear of one of them might make a move.

11. He makes odd comments about you being together

But not in the way you want. Instead, he’ll tease you, make jokes about the idea of you being together. But let’s get real, no one makes jokes about that unless it’s on their mind or if they’ve seriously thought about it.

The question you should be asking is if he likes you, why is he trying to suppress his feelings?

12. He tries to make you jealous

Generally, a guy will probably be quiet about other women. But sometimes, he might try and make you jealous too, to see how you react.

Don’t be surprised if a girl suddenly pops up and he makes sure that you know about it. The chances of it being anything more than an act to annoy you are pretty slim. [Read: Why am I so jealous? How to recognize the hidden reasons & fix it]

13. He’s different around you compared to everyone else

Does he act a little differently around you but you can’t quite put your finger on it? That’s because he’s holding himself back, trying to avoid you catching him in his feelings!

It could also be that he’s simply more protective and inquisitive about you, which is a sure sign he’s crushing on you even if he’s pretending not to like you.

14. If you need him, he’s there

If you need help, you know he would be there in a heartbeat but he would do it in a way that says “we’re just friends.” However, the undertone and the eagerness to help tell you something very different indeed.

15. He teases you more than everyone else

This is another example of him treating you differently from everyone else. If you notice that he teases you playfully and he doesn’t really do the same with everyone else, that’s one of the signs he’s pretending not to like you.

If anyone ever called him out on it, he would deny all knowledge and say he does it to everyone. [Read: How to tease a guy and make him realize how much he likes you]

16. He’s very active on your social media but never mentions it in person

He likes everything, comments on many things, and you chat online very easily. However, when you’re face to face, it’s like there is a barrier in the way. That’s because his inhibitions aren’t there when he can hide behind his phone or a keyboard, but he’s laid bare in person.

17. Other people assume you’re together

Those who aren’t in your inner circle might assume that you’re already together. Perhaps they make a comment about “your boyfriend” and when you tell them that you’re single, they’re surprised.

People outside of the situation can often see what’s going on far more clearly than those in the middle of it. [Read: Are we a couple? 14 signs to know for sure if it’s a definite yes]

18. He comes alive when you’re around

It’s like someone has turned the lights on inside his eyes and he’s suddenly sparkling whenever you’re around him. That’s one of the big signs he’s pretending not to like you because it’s something he can’t really control!

However, it might also be the opposite and he suddenly becomes shy and unsure of himself. Either way, he’s trying to pretend he doesn’t care when he clearly does.

19. He remembers small details

We don’t routinely remember everything about people who we’re not extremely close to. So, if he remembers the small details, such as your favorite color, your favorite food, or your birthday perhaps, that means he’s paying attention to you more than anyone else. [Read: Why won’t he ask me out? 27 reasons and the best ways to get him to make a move]

20. Your friends tell you that he likes you

Again, those outside of the situation can read it better so if your friends are telling you that he likes you, listen to them!

[Read: 16 hushed signs a guy really likes you but is scared you’ll reject him if he makes a move]

If there are signs he’s pretending not to like you even when your gut tells you he likes you, ask yourself why. If he’s trying to dodge his feelings because of who you are, well, then it’s time to find a new guy.

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