23 Sure Signs He Is Pursuing You Even If He Behaves Like a Friend

We expect men to pursue us the way we see in movies. But life isn’t a Hollywood chick flick. Look out for these signs he is pursuing you.

signs he is pursuing you

Honestly, you can blame Hollywood movies for all the confusion we have to experience in real life when it comes to knowing the signs he is pursuing you!

You may assume “pursuing” means a man dramatically chasing you down the street in slo-mo, falling to his knees while calling out your name. Obviously, if you’re looking for that kind of sign, you probably won’t find them in a guy who’s trying to be subtle while trying to woo you.

Things are a lot different in real life, and the little clues and signs, they stay subtle. You just need to know where to look and what they mean.

[Read: 30 guaranteed signs he likes you even if you’re not really sure of his intentions]

Do you want him to pursue you?

Before you look out for the signs he is pursuing you, decide whether or not you want him to. As women, we become so consumed with knowing if a guy likes us that we totally negate our own feelings.

Instead of asking yourself if you’re even interested in the guy, your obsession with finding out if he is interested in you may make you fall for him without even realizing it!

So, before you go looking for these signs so you can jump into a relationship, take your time. Figure out if you like him or not. If you don’t, you don’t need to waste your time. [Read: 13 ways to find out if you really like him]

The clearest signs he is pursuing you even if he’s subtle about it

Some guys are nervous and show no signs that they like you. Others may just chase you down, telling you they love you and want to be with you.

But the majority of men will take a calmer approach while still showing their interest.

If you feel he’s giving you mixed signals, this is something else.

Mixed signals show an internal confusion the man is dealing with. If you see a lack of action behind his words, then this isn’t the guy for you. But we’re not going to focus on mixed signals today. Instead, we’ll talk about the certain signs he’s pursuing you.

[Read: Mixed signals from a guy? The guide to interpreting his intentions]

You’re looking for the signs he’s pursuing you, but are you really seeing them?

1. He contacts you

If a guy is interested in you, he’ll contact you. He won’t wait days or weeks for you to make a move. He’ll send you texts or call you to chat and ask you out.

If he weren’t interested, you would wait for the rest of your life for a text that would never come. If the guy likes you, he won’t wait for someone else to slide in and take his spot. [Read: How to decode the text from a guy and tell if he is into you]

2. He’s consistent

It’s really all about consistency when you’re looking for the signs a guy is pursuing you. If he texts you when he says he’s going to text you and meets you when he says he will, this is a sign he’s interested in you.

A man who isn’t interested in you or sees you as casual will only contact you when convenient for him.

3. You feel yourself around him

When you’re spending time with him, you don’t feel like you need to be on your best behavior.

You can crack jokes, tease each other, and talk about your passions and hobbies without feeling judged. Feeling comfortable around him is a sign you are connecting. [Read: Science-backed clues that will tell you if he likes you]

4. He makes plans for the two of you

When he texts or calls you, he usually has a reason why. Of course, he may text you just to keep the connection going, but most of the time, the conversation will end with him inviting you out to a movie, dinner, or coffee.

5. He opens up to you

Men won’t open up with just anyone they meet. Though it may take a couple of dates to develop the trust and bond between you, his vulnerability is a huge sign he’s interested in you. [Read: 16 signs a guy likes you but is scared and unsure what to do]

6. He wants to meet your friends and family

If a guy isn’t interested in you or sees you only as someone casual, there’s no way he’ll meet your friends and family. Why would he?

But if you’re looking for signs he is pursuing you, see if he wants to get to know the people who raised you and the friends you spend your time with.

7. He actively listens

This isn’t something people are good at. Yes, we hear others when they talk, but we’re not actually listening. Instead, most of us are thinking of a good reply or other random thoughts. But he genuinely listens to you and engages in genuine eye contact.

8. Your needs matter to him

If you want to be in a healthy and happy relationship, you both need to care about each other’s needs. When you express your need, he doesn’t just ignore you and continues with what he wants to do. He listens. You talk about it and come up with a solution. [Read: How to fix a one-sided relationship before it fails]

9. You meet his friends/family

If a guy introduces you to his friends and family, this is a huge step forward.

He’s showing you to the people he loves and trusts the most. He wants to not only let his friends and family see the person he’s interested in but also show you his life.

10. He talks about the future

No, we don’t mean the wedding. But he’ll talk about what you should do next week or a restaurant he wants to take you to.

If a guy isn’t interested in you, the last thing he’s going to do is talk about spending any time with you in the future. [Read: How to know for sure if he likes you +35 ways to make him like you more]

11. He does small kind acts for you

It’s really about the small details of your interactions. He surprises you with take-out after knowing you had a long day at work. Or, he offers to help you when it’s out of his way.

He’s doing these things because he cares and likes you. He wouldn’t go out of his way if he didn’t feel this way.

12. He touches you

He doesn’t touch you inappropriately, but he brushes against you or sweeps the hair out of your face. When he’s using any excuse just to get close to you, it is a major sign a guy is pursuing you.

13. He tries to make you laugh

When a guy likes you, he wants to be the one who makes you smile. He loves seeing your smile and wants to be the person who causes it. He is probably pursuing you if he is telling you jokes, sharing funny anecdotes, or even sending you clever memes. [Read: Does he like you? 23 ways to read a guy’s body language instantly]

14. He compliments you

This is an obvious one but still needs to be said. When a guy is pursuing you, he will compliment you in any which way. He will tell you you are smart or funny or pretty. He wants you to be flattered.

15. He asks you questions

If a guy is pursuing you, he wants to know more about you. The more he knows you, the better he’ll be at pursuing you, so this makes sense.

If he is trying to find out about your tastes, your childhood, or really anything, odds are he is interested.

16. He offers to help you

Unless a guy is pursuing you, he won’t offer to help you move or build furniture.

Only a guy interested in you will drive you to the airport or go out of his way for you. [Read: How do I know if he likes me if he won’t talk to me?]

17. He wants your opinion

When a guy asks you for advice, he isn’t just making conversation. He wouldn’t ask if he didn’t genuinely care what you think.

Whether he wants to know which tie you like better or if he should take a new job, he respects your opinions and thinks highly of you.

18. He stares

When a guy is pursuing you, he is still in that love-dovey mode. Your beauty and your presence floor him. If you catch him staring at you, it is because he is intrigued.

19. He notices things

Got a new haircut? He will mention it. Tried something new with your makeup? He will point it out.

When he is pursuing you, he pays extra close attention and picks up on things most people tend to overlook! [Read: 20 signs he has a crush on you and just can’t hide it well enough]

20. He teases you

Teasing is a way to show your interest in someone from when you’re a tween until well into adulthood. He may tease your taste in music or a TV show you watch, but it is all an excuse to talk to you.

21. He wants to spend time alone with you

If he isn’t interested, he won’t be putting in the effort to hang out with you alone. He will offer to walk you to your car or come over and watch the game. He wants to be with you alone so you can start seeing him the way he sees you.

22. You feel it

We’re humans, not robots. You know when someone has feelings for you. After reading these signs to know if he is pursuing you, hopefully, you’ll have a clearer idea.

If you feel there is chemistry and an emotional bond between you two, you’re probably right. If you’re not sure, then clarify with him what’s going on. [Read: The signs he’s fighting his feelings for you and holding himself back]

23. He tells you

If he tells you he’s interested in you and wants a relationship, well, then he’s probably telling the truth. Take his words for what they are and watch his actions. If his actions match what he’s saying to you, then he’s honest.

[Read: How to get a guy to ask you out – 15 sneaky ways to get him to make the first move]

If you weren’t sure about the signs he is pursuing you, hopefully, these tips helped you solve the big mystery. It’s about time you knew what was going on!

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