Like a wing man, a wing woman is the person you can count on to be there to make every night more memorable than it would be on your own.
We all know what a wing man is, but is there such thing as a wing woman? The answer is, of course, yes! I’ll often go out with my single friends to help them look for the perfect mate. Happily married, I have no intention of picking anyone up, but I know that I’m more outgoing and don’t have a problem starting a conversation with someone who may be a potential love interest for my friend.
The best part about having a wing woman is that she isn’t ever in competition with you, and she has nothing to lose by putting herself out there and making the introduction.
There are several keys to finding the perfect wing woman to bring along. You want to choose someone who is going to have your back, is fearless, loves you, and is there not for her own ego, but to help you find someone to make you happy.
Look for these 25 wing woman must-haves
If you want to find the perfect wing woman to accompany you for the perfect evening, these are the 25 characteristics to look for before taking them along.
#1 They are pretty, but not a ten when you are a two. Your wing woman can’t be so much hotter than you that you’re going to fade into the background. Try to choose someone who is attractive enough to make guys come running, but not to make you disappear as a possibility.
#2 They have a good personality and are outgoing. The whole idea behind a wing woman is to help you as a partner in crime, not as a dead appendage. They should be capable of bringing something to the table so they can help you if the conversation has a lull, or if you need a little boost of confidence. [Read: How to be charming and liked by everyone]
#3 They have a charismatic appeal. A wing woman should be charming enough to attract men, not turn them away. You want her to be engaging and play off of your lead.
#4 She’s more like one of the guys. Try to choose a wing woman who is more like a guy and can handle any situation. She should be the yin to your yang, and help out in those areas that you don’t have the capability to engage in, like sports knowledge, etc. [Read: How to think like a man and impress your guy]
#5 She doesn’t have a hidden agenda. She isn’t an attention hog who is trying to get the guy for herself and just pretending to be there to help you out.
#6 She has a high self-esteem. A wing woman is someone who has a high enough self-esteem that she’ll have no problem taking the chance walking over to the group of guys you want to talk to. [Read: 12 subtle body language moves to appear more confident]
#7 She believes in the theory of “no woman left behind.” Your wing woman is supposed to have your back. That means that she won’t find her own guy and disappear, leaving you alone in the bar to fend for yourself.
#8 You don’t have the same taste in guys. You don’t want to choose a wing woman who has the same taste in guys as you do, or you might end up spending your time fighting over the same hotties. [Read: The 10 types of guys in the world of dating]
#9 She isn’t an attention whore. You don’t want a wing woman who can’t seem to get enough attention. The attention whore isn’t ever going to let you shine, or even allow you to exist. In fact, she will do everything possible to make you disappear, and that is the exact opposite of what you want a wing woman to do. [Read: 16 attention whore signs to watch out for]
#10 Although not necessary, it’s best if she’s in a relationship. If your wing woman is in a committed relationship, that ensures that she really has nothing to lose by rejection. It also means that she won’t be in a competition with you over the guy she finds, because she already has a man.
#11 You are okay with taking turns being her wing woman. Your wing woman should be okay with fading to the back, but in the same respect, you have to know when to let her shine. If she is going to do it for you, you should be willing to return the favor if she needs it.
#12 They won’t monopolize the conversation. It’s a good thing that your wing woman can hold her own in a conversation, is funny, and can add something to the mix. But she shouldn’t monopolize it to the degree that you never get a word in edgewise. [Read: How to keep a conversation going with the opposite sex]
#13 She isn’t jealous of you. Your wing woman should be there for support, and that isn’t going to happen if she is jealous of you. [Read: Taming the green monster: When is a girl’s jealousy okay?]
#14 She knows how to dress appropriately. Your wing woman is a reflection of you. As your mom has probably always said, you are who you associate yourself with. Try to choose someone who is like you, and that includes dressing like you and not wearing something that gives guys the opposite impression of who you are.
#15 You’ve known each other for a long time. The best wing woman is someone who you have known forever. You can trust her to have your back, and she cares for you enough to let you shine.
#16 She isn’t afraid to be your Jiminy Cricket, if necessary. There will be times when your wing woman will have to be your voice of reason. A wing woman is not only someone who gets the guy to come over and talk, but she is also the one who will steer you away from those guys who are obviously not good for you. [Read: Unpopular opinion: 10 reasons to date the bad boy]
#17 She has a look all her own, and you don’t look like twins. If you look like sisters, then you’re probably going to be in competition, whether you want to be or not. Any guy that comes over is going to have to choose by personality and interests, not by looks, which will always create a competitive situation.
#18 She isn’t so interesting that she naturally calls for all the attention. Don’t choose someone who has traveled the world over or is famous, even. There is no way to shine if someone is the star of every circle they enter into.
#19 She isn’t oblivious to her inability to stop flirting. Some girls are completely oblivious to the fact that they are flirting. Don’t choose a wing woman who just can’t seem to help herself from hitting on every guy she sees, even if she doesn’t even know that she’s doing it. [Read: 15 obvious flirting signs between a guy and a girl]
#20 She doesn’t drink to the point of no return. A wing woman isn’t a good choice if she is known for dancing on tables at the end of the night… without you. You don’t want to carry your wing woman home instead of the cute guy you were after.
#21 She isn’t too self-disclosed. Don’t choose someone who has no filter or says things that are offensive. That will turn any guy off, whether they are into you or not.
#22 She’s honest enough to tell you when the guy is someone she might really have a connection with. If your wing woman really has an interest in a guy that you initially had your eye on and they’ve really hit it off, she should be honest with you about her feelings. Sometimes, that’s just the way the cookie crumbles, and you should be gracious about it, too.
#23 She doesn’t embarrass you. Drinking and being outgoing can be a fun time. Flashing boobs or grabbing guys’ packages is going too far. Make sure your wing woman knows where to draw the line so that she doesn’t make a fool out of the both of you.
#24 She pushes you to be a little more adventurous than you would be on your own. Your wing woman should be able to bring out the best in you and challenge you to step outside of your comfort zone. [Read: 5 powerful steps to break out of your comfort zone]
#25 She’s downright fun. The goal isn’t purely about finding a guy. The goal is to have a good time, and finding the guy should be the icing on the cake. [Read: Make the most of your girls’ night with these 13 fun ideas]
The best wing woman will have your back, be silly and outgoing for you, and, most of all, she is someone whom you can trust to let you shine when you need a little spotlight.
