Types of Guys to Avoid Dating If You Don’t Want to Be Used or Hurt

The world is full of dating opportunities, but if you want to keep your heart in one piece, there are some types of guys to avoid dating. Learn them here! 

types of guys

Dating can provide you valuable experiences and insights into what kinds of guys are out there. It helps you find out just what you like and don’t like in potential mates and relationships. But, as much as you want to believe everyone is good, there are some types of guys to avoid dating at all costs.

The search for that “someone” can be frustrating. It may come to the point where you’re willing to settle for anyone, overlooking certain qualities you actually don’t like just so you can finally say you’re in a relationship.

Don’t do it.

If you’re a smart woman, you’ll know that there are just a few things that you should not put up with. There really are certain types of men that you should stay away from. [Read: What is a toxic relationship? 53 signs to recognize love that hurts you]

Types of guys to avoid dating if you want to remain sane and hopeful about love

Hey, life is too short to date guys you don’t like. So here, we cut to the chase and give you a definitive list of the types of guys to avoid dating. In fact, you should totally avoid them like a plague, not just when it comes to dating.

The problem? Most will appear charming at the start. It can be tricky to work out their real personality and intentions. But the best thing to consider is this – if they appear too good to be true, that’s because they are.

Remember, nobody is perfect. [Read: The signs of a toxic boyfriend that should make you move away fast]

1. The commitment-phobe

He can be charming, brooding, mysterious, friendly, and the life of the party. He can be all that you’ve ever wanted in a guy. The only problem is that he’s afraid of commitment.

There’s a part of you that wants to change him. You want to be the one to be able to allay his reservations about it, but he says he’s just happy the way you both are. “Just enjoy the ride,” he says.

Well, if that’s not what you want, then it’s time to get off at the next stop. [Read: The 10 best kept secrets to making a man commit to you]

2. The control freak

He buys you a fancy dress and tells you to wear it on your next date. You appreciate it as a grand, romantic gesture — that is, until he tells you what to order at the restaurant, what to talk about, what to say, how to act.

Well, girl, you’ve got yourself a control freak. He’s the bossy guy who will order you around and throw a hissy fit if things don’t go his way.

This type of guy can be abusive, so it’s best to steer clear. [Read: 9 ways guys manipulate and control their girlfriends]

3. The underachiever

Couch potato, lazy, basement-dweller, lives with his mom, doesn’t have a job, doesn’t have plans. You know this guy. He’s the type who will get out of bed just to pee and then go back to lying on the couch for the rest of the day.

He has no hobby *except for maybe video games*, skills, aspirations, or future. Believe us, stay away from this guy. [Read: Lazy people – 50 wily ways to manipulate others to work for them]

4. The Jekyll-and-Hyde

He’ll catch your eye. Every girl’s eye, actually. He’s that dreamy, charming, interesting, witty, prince-charming kind of guy you would love to show off to your family and friends during holiday dinners.

However, once you get to know him, you’ll realize that he’s actually a wolf in sheep’s clothing. He swings from one personality to another and hides a million secrets. You never know what version you’re going to get on any given day.

Run like the wind! [Read: 21 big signs of emotional abuse you may be overlooking]

5. The alpha jerk

You won’t miss him in a pack of other guys, as he is usually the leader. Whether in the club, in the office, or just about anywhere, he is the alpha male and he won’t let anyone forget it.

He can be overbearing to the point that he’s annoying and disrespectful. He might even get into brawls or argue with anyone who he thinks may steal the spotlight from him.

6. Mama’s boy

It’s been said that you’ll know a good guy by looking at how he treats his mother, but if he’s a mama’s boy, then you have to say “no.”

He can never make a decision without consulting mom, and if you ever have a relationship with him, you’ll definitely feel like a third wheel in this too-close-for-comfort relationship. [Read: Mommy issues in men – What it is and the signs to look for in a guy]

7. The serial cheater

This is definitely a guy to avoid at all costs. He’ll lie, deceive, and slither his way into your skirt, as well as the skirts of all the other women in town.

If you meet a guy who already has a girlfriend, but he cheats on her with you, get real. If he cheated with you, he’ll probably cheat on you, too.

Do yourself a favor and don’t even get involved. [Read: 9 sure ways to find out if you’re dating a cheater]

8. The rover

Though this guy may not actually act on it, the fact that his eyes are always roving around and visually ogling other women is enough to make you want to back off.

You don’t have to compete for his attention. And if he’s making inappropriate, pervy comments about other women, then what kinds of things is he saying about you behind your back?

Pick yourself up and move along. He’s not worth it. [Read: Emotional cheating and 10 bad things it can do to you]

9. The free-loader

He may look the part: nice clothes, nice shoes, well-manicured nails, and all that. However, the free-loader is actually a kept man. He actively seeks out women to pay his way, much as a lazy, talentless guy would do.

He will charm you just so you’ll fall into his trap. After that, he’ll make demands while expecting you to unconditionally and unquestioningly provide for him.

10. The cheapskate

Unlike the free-loader, this guy will actually pay… for his meal. He’s the type who will ask you out on a date, but then suggest you go Dutch and may even take out a calculator for it.

You can’t expect him to buy you flowers, or anything for that matter. It’s not that he can’t afford to take you to dinner and a movie, he’s just cheap. [Read: How to stop fighting over money in a relationship]

11. The egomaniac

He’s a confident guy. In fact, too confident. He cares way too much about how he looks, his reputation, and being the center of the universe.

He dislikes it if your opinion differs from his, because his opinion is truth. Honestly, he’s just exhausting to be around.

12. The bachelor

He can be attractive, well-mannered, successful—an actual eligible bachelor. He’ll make you wonder why some woman hasn’t already snagged him down the aisle. Then you’ll start going out and will think that maybe, just maybe, you’re the Mrs. Right he’s waiting for.

But then you’re wrong—there’s no right woman for this guy, and there never will be. He’s fully committed, all right—committed to being eternally single. [Read: 10 casual relationship rules to keep it just casual]

13. The man-child

He may be in his 30s or 40s, but he’s still acting like a frat boy. He’s into keggers, jerseys, beer pong, and video games. He might bring out the kid in you, too, because he’s a kid himself.

But if ever you get into serious trouble, you can’t expect him to be around. He’ll have hopped the fence with the underagers. [Read: Immature men – 27 man child signs and why you should stay away from him]

14. The needy guy

He shows up with flowers on every date, texts you morning through night, cooks for you from scratch, and is just all around perfect… until you realize that he’s actually clingy.

Deep down, he’s insecure, so he needs you to constantly assure him that he’s worth something. Sure, the gestures might be nice, but can you really imagine yourself having to coddle your man 24/7 for the rest of your life?

We can’t, either. [Read: 11 easy ways to deal with needy people in your life]

15. Mr Know-it-All

He turns every conversation into a debate just so he can hear himself talk. He tells you he’s read every book you ever mention, and he’s studied this and that.

But if there are things he’s yet to learn, he’s not going take it in stride. He’ll put up his best fight to assure you that he, indeed, knows all.

And if he loses? Prepare for the tantrum to follow. [Read: Confident or cocky? 16 subtle signs that split an arrogant and modest man]

16. The married guy

This is absolutely, plainly, utterly a tremendous “NO!” Bad idea.

Firstly, he’s already taken. He made a commitment to someone through thick and thin, till death do they part. Secondly, how exactly do you think this will pan out for you? And what if his wife finds out?

There’s just too much drama that you really needn’t be a part of. [Read: Are you dating a married man?]

17. The procrastinator

A guy that puts off everything until the last minute is not just doing so at work. He pays his bills at the last second or even late. He is generally irresponsible, not to mention, he cannot make you a priority.

This is the type of guy that promises you will do something great for your anniversary but continues putting it off until you are too old to leave your front porch.

You do not want to end up with this guy. So, why date him now? You want a man that can keep his promises. [Read: Manchild alert! Don’t fall for the immature prick]

18. The charmer

A charming guy is great. He makes you less nervous. He knows the exact right thing to say and exactly when to say it. And that is what makes him so dangerous.

Before getting sucked into the charm of a man like this, remember you don’t want a guy who is perfect. If he is, he is hiding something. You want a guy that is real. 

He may have some quirks and woes, but he cares and is there for you. [Read: How to be charming – 15 adorable habits of really likable people]

19. The generalizer

This is the guy that sort of says the right thing. You like him, and you think he likes you but are never quite sure.

He gives you just enough hope to stick around, but never enough to feel confident in the relationship. He doesn’t call you his girlfriend or introduce you to his friends or family, but he does show signs he likes you. 

If he cannot be straightforward with you one way or another, it will never go anywhere past his confusion. Get out now, before you are too hooked. [Read: 16 common relationship tips that ruin your love life]

20. The love bomber

A love bomber is dangerous. This is someone that rushes into things really quickly and probably says “I love you” early. They spoil you and treat you how you always wanted to be treated.

Sound great, right?

No. A love bomber is on the hunt for someone looking for acceptance and wants to be validated. They love bomb you and smother you with amazingness so that you crave that feeling. And they do it just long enough to trap you. [Read: What is love bombing and 5 ways to spot the signs early on]

Then another side of them comes out. The bomb goes off so to speak and this love bomber can become controlling, abusive, and even violent. This is a master manipulator.

So, look out for a guy who loves too much, too fast. He cannot love you if he doesn’t know you.

21. The avoider

Much like the procrastinator this man is emotionally juvenile. He may like you, you may have a great time together, but anytime you want to take a step forward he avoids it like the plague.

Then, he will make excuses not to meet your friends or family. He won’t make room for your toothbrush and extra set of underwear at his place. Basically, he is pretty much avoiding commitment. [Read: 20 downright strange but true phobias about love]

22. The secret keeper

A guy who keeps secrets cannot be trusted. Relationships are not just about communication, but honesty. And if he is shady, there is a reason for it.

Instead of second-guessing your gut feeling, second guess him. Do not go through his drawers or his phone. Instead, confront this guy. Ask him for straight answers to the things he has been hiding.

If he cannot be upfront with you, you can do better. [Read: Keeping secrets in a relationship – 42 must know rules and exceptions]

23. The pathological liar

This isn’t someone who lies about cheating necessarily, but about everything. 

If someone lies with no purpose, they have no problem lying to anyone. You’ll find that he lies about the smallest things to the biggest things, so how can you ever trust him?

You can’t. Time to move on. [Read: How to easily spot the pathological liar]

24. The regular cheater

This person has a track record. You wouldn’t take a job with a CEO that has a history or embezzlement, so why date a man that has a history of being dishonest?

We all hope we can be the one that he will stay with and won’t cheat on. We even tell ourselves we are the real deal and the other girls are just for sex. But do we really believe that?

If you know he cheated before, calculate your risk. If he cheated once in high school or college and regrets it, go in with caution. But if he has cheated in the last three years, turn the other way. [Read: What is cheating in a relationship? The truth most people ignore]

25. The misogynist

If he doesn’t treat women equally, he won’t treat you equally. If he is only respectful to women he finds attractive and not anyone else, he is a misogynist.

No matter how much good you see in him and how successful or funny he is, a misogynist will never let you soar. He will never let you do better than him and will never consider your feelings or opinions.

The truth is, he may be damn good at pretending, but a misogynist is not a man, he is a coward. [Read: 18 ways to immediately identify an misogynist]

26. The green-eyed monster

Jealousy is ugly. We all get a taste of envy once in a while and that is normal, but when it gets out of hand, you shut it down.

If they are jealous, you do not need that in your life. Jealousy doesn’t just drive them nuts, but it drives you nuts. You want to prove you are honest and loyal, but shouldn’t have to.

Jealousy means there is no trust, and you cannot date someone that doesn’t trust you. [Read: The full guide to turn a jealous boyfriend into a not-so-jealous one]

27. The Hulk

A man who has anger issues is the type of man you shouldn’t date. This is a man that cannot control himself. Whether he punches walls or gets in fights in bars, there is no saying if or when that anger will make its way back to you.

Save yourself the trouble. There are plenty of non-violent men out there that are still passionate. [Read: 10 ways to handle dating someone with anger issues]

28. The ghost

This is the man that disappears without a trace. Maybe you chatted for a week, maybe you went on a great date, maybe you have been dating for months, then he just dropped off the face of the earth. 

No one is unreachable in this day and age. He is making the choice not to talk to you and not to answer you. Whether he haunts your Instagram or keeps up on your Snapchat, he is not interested in you at the level you deserve.

Even if he comes back to life and messages you, he does not deserve your attention. [Read: 15 reasons why guys ghost and turn into cowarldy pricks]

29. The selfish guy

Relationships should be two-ways streets. Hell, even friendships and general encounters! If you meet this type of guy, you’ll quickly come to realize that everything is about him.

If it’s a guy you’re dating, he’s selfish in bed and outside of it. He wants everything his own way and he’s not pleasant when he doesn’t get it.

Don’t put your own needs aside for a guy like this; your wants and desires matter too. This is definitely one of the types of guys to avoid dating. [Read: Selfishness in relationships – 15 tips to do the right thing]

30. The self-pitying ‘nice guy’

Okay, firstly, this guy isn’t nice. If he was, he wouldn’t be self-pitying it up everywhere.

There are different types of narcissists out there, and one is a covert type. This is the guy who makes everyone feel sorry for him and loves to act the victim. Then, you start saying, “awww, I’m so sorry you feel that way, what can I do for you?”

Boom! He’s got you right where he wants you. Self-pity isn’t attractive and most of the time it’s nothing but an act. [Read: Covert narcissist – What it is, 34 signs, and how to see the games they play]

31. The racist

Do we really need to explain this one?

The moment you see any hint of racism from a guy, run away and don’t look back. Without a doubt, the racist guy is one of the types of guys to avoid dating at all costs.

32. The sexter

Okay, sexting in a relationship can be a good thing, but not with someone you’ve just met and barely had a deep conversation with. Basically, he’s only after one thing and he’s making it very clear from the start.

He’ll get your number, you’ll have one pleasant conversation where you get the vibe that he’s not really into it. Then he’ll start bombarding you with sexts. Go along with these at your peril and he’s one of the types of guys to avoid dating! [Read: How to sext your boyfriend – A naughty guide to leave him yearning]

Why you should stay away from these guys

There are plenty of fish in the sea. There still are good, honest, smart, ambitious, hard-working, and socially *as well as mentally* balanced men out there. So don’t lose hope.

It might take time to find these good ones in the vastness of all the lazy, cheating, self-absorbed, needy, greedy, lying jerks that you see.

But don’t settle for any of the latter-mentioned guys, because you deserve so much more than what they can offer. That one good guy is out there waiting for you, even if he comes into your life when you least expect it.

All of these types of guys to avoid dating will cause you heartache to some degree. Some may drive you crazy in the process. Seriously, it’s not worth it.

[Read: 25 signs and qualities that make a great boyfriend]

There are good guys, there are bad guys, and there are guys who you really shouldn’t even bother getting to know. Now that you have a hold on the types of guys to avoid dating, remember to steer clear and save yourself the trouble.

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Tiffany Grace Reyes
Tiffany is a wordsmith who has played with words ever since her letter-to-the-editor was published nationally at the age of 9. Since then her writing has gone f...
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