Men can be really bad at asking for what they want. That’s why it helps to do a bit of research and find out what men truly crave in bed.
The typical guy is a man of very few words. Most aren’t likely to overly share information about their personal lives, even to their girlfriends, and especially not about something as private as sex. So it can be quite difficult to decipher what he does and doesn’t want from you in bed. But not to worry, we’re here to help!
Why guys won’t tell you what they want in bed
It can be adorable when guys seem shy about what they want to do in bed, but it can also be exasperating when you end up doing the same stuff over and over because you have no idea what either of you want.
It is true that men can be simple beings with primal tastes, but some are willing to think out of the box. This becomes a problem when all they do is think, and not act, or at least ask.
It’s hard to imagine that guys, who are often predisposed to be the dominant player in a relationship, can have reservations about telling girls what they want in bed. But the truth is that it all boils down to ego.
Some guys are confident enough to tell their girls what they want. Others, not so much. This also depends on the level of intimacy and trust in your relationship. If a guy feels that his advances will be rejected, he won’t even attempt to try something new in the bedroom.
If, however, he gets some sort of clue that you might be willing to do something a little out of your comfort zone, that’s when he may put in the request for something like that new Kama Sutra position he’s heard about. But some men won’t tell you what they want for fear of being judged or rejected, so it’s up to you to ask, or in this case, find out what men really want in bed. [Read: 9 ways to get your man to start communicating with you]
So what do men really want in bed?
If you’re getting frustrated or bored in bed because he’s not telling you what he desires, give these 20 foolproof guy-pleasers a try. He may be craving:
#1 To pleasure you. Shocking? Not really. Guys are very sensitive when it comes to their egos. One of the easiest ways to feed that is to let them see you writhe in ecstasy.
#2 To make you want him more. Men like to be appreciated. They can be just as insecure as women, so it helps when you show them that you’re just as excited to get into bed with them as they are with you. [Read: How to please your man in bed and every other place]
#3 To feel you without a condom. Let’s admit that no latex company has ever come close to inventing a condom that feels exactly like human flesh. Just be sure you have other methods of contraception available before giving him the go-ahead on this one.
#4 To come while you’re on top. Lying down with their arms behind their heads and having an orgasm without lifting a finger? Duh. Let him be the king of the bedroom every once in a while. [Read: 19 ways to own the cowgirl position and make it hotter]
#5 To give you multiple orgasms. This is like a consecutive winning streak for them. It’s very good for their competitive side.
#6 To hear you moan loudly. Moaning elicits a primal response, not just in the body, but also in the brain. It gives your partner a sense that what he’s doing is pleasuring you, and that makes him feel oh-so-manly. [Read: How to sound sexy in bed and arouse your partner]
#7 To come in your mouth. No man has ever rejected the idea of coming inside a woman’s mouth and watching her swallow every last drop.
#8 To see your primal reaction to what they’re doing. Your face when you come, the sound of your voice, the feel of your body spasming under them—he wants to feel and see it all.
#9 A surprise once in a while. Everyone loves a surprise. But for those who don’t, doing something you’ve never done before can be just as exciting as standing in the doorway without any clothes on. [Read: How to keep a guy interested in 30 super sexy ways]
#10 A random blowjob. Since he’ll probably not be expecting it, this’ll feel like hitting the jackpot. [Read: 11 secrets to give good head and blow his mind every time]
#11 For you to take the reins. Some men don’t like it when women play the dominant role in the bedroom, but most will agree that it’s often such a rare occurrence that the novelty will never wear off.
#12 For you to volunteer doing something new. This is almost the same as taking the reins in the bedroom, except this time, you’ll be the one suggesting something that you or your partner have never considered. Or maybe they have, but they were just too shy to ask. Either way, it’s a win for both of you.
#13 For you to suggest new positions. Guys are all about the novelty when it comes to sex positions, but it blows their minds when you suggest something a little raunchier, like the pile-driver, perhaps? [Read: 30-day sex challenge: 30 positions for 30 days]
#14 To watch you pleasure yourself. A lot of women are still reluctant to show their partner how they pleasure themselves, but once you do, you’ll see that it brings your intimacy to a whole new level. Bonus points when you see your guy drooling and panting, even when he’s not touching you.
#15 For you to talk dirty. Some people may feel uncomfortable about dirty talk when they first try it, but as soon as you get used to it, your sex life will never be the same again. [Read: 23 tips to dirty talk and say the sexiest words]
#16 To keep the lights on. Girls are often iffy about having sex with all the lights on. Most of the time, you’re lucky to have the dimmer at medium power. But sometimes, guys want to see your body in its full glory, flaws be damned.
#17 The risk of getting caught. Public places, with your bedroom door unlocked, in the car—you have dozens of legal options. No matter which ones you choose, prepare to have the best quickie of your life.
#18 To see his fantasies come to life. Fantasies are activities or scenarios that are toeing the line between reality and imagination. They can be realized using foreplay, costumes, role play, toys, and different locations. [Read: The top 10 sexual fantasies for men]
#19 To do something kinky and taboo. The list is endless with this one, but you can still start small with things like mild spanking and hair pulling. Once you and your partner have discussed it, you can increase the difficulty and naughtiness of your props and activities. [Read: The sexual role play guide for beginners]
#20 Your appreciation for his effort. Who knew that simply saying “thank you” could elicit a boatload of affection from guys? It’s true. All they want is a little loving for their loving. [Read: What men like in women more than anything else]
It can be frustrating to try to read his mind in the bedroom. If your guy is shy about asking for what he wants in bed, give these surefire suggestions a shot. We promise, he’ll love you even more for it.
