Sexual fetishism can make or break a relationship if you’re not careful. Are you in a relationship with a fetishist partner? Find out how fetishes start and how you can explore them or deal with them.
Click here to read the introduction on sexual obsessions and sexual fetishes.
Are you obsessed with sexual fetishism or have a partner who is a fetishist?
It’s not unusual to be a fetishist, and it’s not something you should be ashamed of.
Just as long as your partner is comfortable with it, and it doesn’t hurt anyone. [Read: Happy ending massage]
Sexual fetishism can make or break a relationship
Unlike random fetishes like interest in shopping or being addicted to talking over the phone, sexual fetishes cover a broad spectrum of the world’s population.
Almost every second person has a unique interest when it comes to sexual fetishism.
Some people become fetishists to add zing to their nightlife. But many others go overboard and indulge in sexual fetishism as their only means of satisfaction in bed.
People with disturbing or strange obsessions in bed are often ostracized in any society, which label them as disturbed people. [Read: Dark secrets of rainbow parties]
Sexual fetishism and your life
It’s always better to keep the kink within the bedroom. This is something anyone with an interest in a fetish should always remember.
Unless your fetish is accepted by society at large, it would be advisable to keep it low profile. Avoiding attention is always better than inviting it, unless you’re an exhibitionist, that is!
If your interest in sexual fetishism makes your partner uncomfortable, you better avoid it. No obsessive sexual fetish is worth more than your partner. A couple can preferably indulge in their fetishes only if both of them consent, and are comfortable with it. [Read: Taking nude pictures of your partner]
Just because you’re a fetishist with an obsession, it really doesn’t mean your partner should enjoy it too. It could turn out to be your worst nightmare.
Incorporating a fetish into your love lives, if both of you are comfortable with it, is the best way to keep that sexual energy on a high. Sexual fetishism can increase your satisfaction, just like talking while having sex, and help you keep the magic alive. Experimenting always helps! [Read: Dirty talking in bed]
At times however, a few accepted sexual fetishes are questionable, especially when they are disturbing in character. As long as such obsessions are kept to yourself, nobody can question you.
They become ethically and morally wrong once they affect someone else who does not want to be affected. Just because you like pain… not everyone’s going to like it!
Fetishists and sexual fetishism – How it starts
Like the normal interests of a person that depends on various genetic, environmental and social factors which usually influence the person during childhood and puberty, sexual fetishism stems from similar varied factors too. Sigmund Freud, the psychologist who came out with his theories in the last century, claimed that all fetishes and obsessions were neurotic in nature.
He believed that every fetishist and fetish stemmed from thoughts and interests formed during one’s childhood. He explained fetishes such as podophilia (an interest for feet), and related obsessions claiming, infants obsess about feet as they usually crawl around their parents’ feet for a larger part of their infanthood.
Similarly he claimed sexual fetishism related to sucking breasts and oral sex stemmed from fixations people had with their oral stage, a stage characterized in infanthood by excessive dependency on the mouth. [Read: Why men love staring at breasts]
His explanations could not explain the causes for most other fetishes, and so his theories (as sensible as they sometimes seemed) were ignored.
Today we have tried to stop understanding where sexual fetishes and fetishes originate. Instead, we are trying to understand people who seem excessively dependant on them. It’s not important to know what causes it, how to deal with it makes more sense! A fetishist with an intense sexual fetish, is not one by choice, and shouldn’t be judged by his or her seemingly abnormal preferences in bed.
Do you have a fetishist partner? Or do you think you like a form of sexual fetishism? It really doesn’t matter, just as long as the business is private and involves a person who shares the same taste. Click here to read about the different types of fetishes.
