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Aphrodisiacs and Food Hell: A Lover’s Guide to Eating Well

Food can be an incredibly important part of the lovemaking process, from the aphrodisiac properties of some, to the downright turn off provided by others.


Lovemaking, sex, if you prefer, is something very few of us would wish to exist without. Not only is it an incredibly potent relaxant, reducing stress levels, promoting feelings of closeness, and providing a healthy and effective form of exercise, but it’s also bloody good fun!

And what we eat can make a huge difference as to whether our lovemaking is a resounding success or an utter and humiliating flop. Two lists have been compiled to put the reader on the right road to food heaven and extra sexual enjoyment. The first of these is a list of aphrodisiacs; those foods that aid us in our sexual activities. The second list is of foods that don’t aid the sexual process and for a whole host of reasons – as you soon shall see.

Food heaven: the aphrodisiacs

#1 Fish. Fish contains the all-important omega-3 oil which, in addition to many other benefits, improves the elasticity of blood vessels and thins the blood. This results in improved blood flow, which is an important constituent in the act of physical arousal.

#2 Fruit. Lots of different fruits have different qualities which aid the lovemaking process. From the general vitamin intake and its contribution to your overall health to such nutrients as zinc which are important in promoting fertility. An added bonus, is how fruit makes you smell and taste good: and, yes, we are referring to your most intimate body parts. [Read: The step-by-step guide to making your vagina smell good and taste even better]

#3 Nuts. Again, the word nut covers a lot of ground with many different contributing nutrients, but, most importantly, it often contains oils which are especially effective in promoting virility.

#4 Chocolate. High cocoa-content chocolate is the best source of phenyl ethylamine, a real powerhouse when it comes to aphrodisiacs. A sensible dose of this food stuff will have your libido shooting through the roof. [Read: 10 sexy benefits of being a chocolate lover]

#5 Oats. Oats stabilize the nervous system which allows your other bodily functions to perform normally and healthily. As a bonus, it also regulates the taste and consistency of seminal fluid.

#6 Oysters. Oysters have an age-old reputation for having aphrodisiac qualities, chiefly a result of the high amount of zinc present; and key in the production of sex hormones. There are other foods found to be higher in zinc, such as certain nuts, but that doesn’t stop oysters from remaining a very popular choice in matters of the bedroom.

#7 Avocado. High levels of vitamin E are present in avocado, which give a quick, sharp boost to energy levels. The benefits of an energy boost before lovemaking should be pretty obvious, but if you need it explained to you; perhaps, you need a slightly more basic guide to sex than this one!

#8 Pine nuts. Another source of zinc, one of the kings of aphrodisiac nutrient, pine nuts are one of the most zinc heavy of foods on this list. They are also easy to grind up and introduce to meals of either sweet or savory varieties. [Read: 10 dishes that’ll get your sex drive to skyrocket in no time]

#9 Chiles. Because of the rather acerbic qualities which chili peppers possess, they stimulate the body’s production of endorphins, the famous *feel good* chemical. Don’t overdo it! Strong chilies have an equal capacity to debilitate when used incorrectly.

#10 Honey. Not a commonly known aphrodisiac, honey is nonetheless a major player in the pursuit of sexual satisfaction. This is mainly due to the presence of boron which regulates hormone levels and also gives the body a much needed energy boost, far more effectively than other sources of sugar.

Food hell: the inhibitors

#11 Coffee. Recent research suggests coffee is actually an aphrodisiac due to its role as a stimulant. However, there is far more research showing it has a detrimental effect on blood pressure and flow – neither of which is of any use to lovemaking.

#12 Alcohol. A little alcohol is a good thing. It helps overcome inhibitions and puts us in the mood for a little sensuality. Too much, makes us tired, sweaty, and downright unattractive – not to mention, in the case of men at least, physically unable to perform. [Read: 10 sober reasons why drunk sex is never a good idea]

#13 Meat. Meat causes lethargy and bloating and dampens the mood. Moreover, greasy or fatty meats can cause residual traces in sweat, making it stain your clothes. Not attractive in any sense.

#14 Beans. “Beans, beans are good for your heart, the more you eat them the more you…” Well, you know the rest. Beans might be a great source of a number of nutrients, but their propensity for producing intestinal gas doesn’t do anyone any favors in the bedroom!

#15 Dairy. Cheese, butter, and milk can cause a feeling of heaviness and a lack of energy, but, most importantly, they make you smell – quite badly. Which doesn’t qualify it as an anti-disiac but does ensure no one wants to come near you!

#16 Soda. Another smell factor nine, refined sugars cause bacteria to breed which in turn can kick up a bit of a stench. One to avoid.

#17 Pasta. Pasta is one of the most commonly consumed sources of simple carbohydrates, along with white rice, and these are downright dampeners between the sheets. Why? Because not only is the energy boost from simple carbs short-lived, but they also produce an insulin surge which makes you bloated and tired.

#18 Popcorn. Referring to the microwave variety only, the plastics which are used to contain the corns contain certain acids which reduce both fertility and virility. Seriously not worth the trade off!

#19 Onions. The reason for this is obvious – they make you stink, and do so for days. Onions are good for your heart, but they won’t do anything for your love life.

#20 Mashed potatoes. Pasta multiplied by ten, mashed potatoes is fantastic if you’re having trouble sleeping, but it is the ultimate passion killer. All those simple carbs combined with all that broken-up starch doesn’t do anything to improve your love life.

[Read: 10 sexy ways to take your sex life from Vanilla to OMFG!]

Try a few of these tips regarding the food listed above to turn your perfunctory and stilted love life into an explosion of sensual excitement.

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David Cullen
David Cullen
David Cullen is frequently described as erudite, insightful and witty – but only by himself and only after several large glasses of Rioja....