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How to Fantasize about Someone Else and Not Feel Guilty

Now this isn’t for the stubborn minded. But if you’re willing to learn how to fantasize about someone else in bed and have better sex, use these tips.

fantasize about someone else

With a bigger brain and an active imagination, nothing is really unthinkable for us.

We constantly look for ways to have a better life, and at times, a better sex life.

Have you been in love long enough to know how sex is going to feel like, even before you have sex with your partner?

When sex becomes more of a pastime instead of an exciting exploration, things can start to slow down at the hips.

It doesn’t mean you love your partner any less.

It only means that the exciting sex has started to get repetitive, and dare we say it …boring.

There are always ways to bring the excitement back into the bedroom, and as with everything else, you need to use what works for you and skip what doesn’t.

How to fantasize about someone else in bed

Now all of us fantasize in bed. It may not always be intentional, but we’ve all been there and enjoyed it.

You may be in the middle of a long sexathon with your partner, and without preamble, you may remember that sexy guy who rubbed shoulders with you as you danced at earlier night’s party, or you may think of that woman in the short skirt who brushed against you often in the crowded elevator.

It may be a passing thought about anything, but at the moment, it excites you and heightens the pleasure.

Fantasizing isn’t a bad thing

These thoughts are not unusual, but most lovers take these libidinous thoughts to their grave and never talk about it with their partner.

And that’s where they go wrong.

All of us fantasize, and it’s about time every lover accepts that. Both of you may truly love each other, but that doesn’t really mean you can’t get sexually excited by someone else. You’ve had these thoughts in bed. What really makes you think your partner hasn’t?

Instead of shoving it deeper into your head, accept it that both of you indulge in it and talk about it with each other. [Read: How to handle jealousy in a relationship]

How to fantasize with your partner

Can you remember the last time you fantasized about someone else? Well, if you’re in a seasoned relationship, there’s a good chance you thought of someone else the very last time you had sex. Perhaps, if you’re only a few years into a relationship, you may not really need this. But you could give it a shot and see if you like it.

Do you have a good relationship?

Before you even think about how to fantasize together, you need to ask yourselves if both of you feel secure and completely in love with each other. You can’t have a terrible marriage and use a good fantasy to hold the relationship together. Instead of bring you both closer, it may even anger one of you and lead to a break up. So if you want to work your courage to fantasize in bed, you need to respect each other and love each other, a lot.

Improve the communication in the relationship

Fantasizing together in bed doesn’t start off in the bedroom. It starts off with communication at all other times.

Do you and your partner share intimate details and almost all secret, naughty thoughts? When you find a guy attractive or a girl sexy, can you tell your partner that you think that person looks good? If you’re secure enough to talk about each other’s crushes and even other little naughty incidents, it’s a definite sign that both of you love each other a lot to feel awkward about sharing these little details.

[Read: Public flashing confessions]

If you’re insecure or not open to accepting that your partner could have a crush on someone else or think someone else is gorgeous, even if both of you are in a committed relationship, this is definitely not for you. You’re probably insecure or the relationship may be too fragile to try fantasizing together. It takes a lot of trust and love to try something new in bed, especially if it’s this intimate and risqué.

[Read: How to build trust in a relationship]

Talk about the sexy things

Before you even get to bed, be willing to talk to each other about the little naughty things that happen in your daily life.

Did you almost kiss a cute friend as you cheek-kissed each other goodbye?  Or did you graze a woman’s breasts at the supermarket while trying to pick a few oranges? So you liked it?

If you’re truly secure in your relationship, talk about these little naughty things that excite you now and then. A lot of sexual things happen all around us all the time, be it a sneak peek at someone changing or a flirty conversation with a sexy person. And yes, it happens even if you’re deeply in love.

Of course, anything taboo or sexually unexpected in a pleasant manner is bound to excite anyone. Even your loyal partner.

If you want to know how to fantasize about someone else in bed, ask yourself if both of you share such an intimate relationship where you can honestly share your sexual thoughts with each other. If you’re in the slot, well, here’s what you need to do to have some of the sexiest nights of your life.

[Read: Top ten female fantasies]

[Read: Top ten male fantasies]

Click here to continue reading about fantasizing about someone else with your partner and find out how to do it the right way. After all, understanding how to fantasize about someone else in bed too has its own rules.

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The editorial team of LovePanky comprises relationship experts and real-life experts that share their experiences and life lessons. If you want the best love ad...