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How to Tell if Someone Wants to Hurt You Because They Don’t Care

Unfortunately, some people have bad intentions. Here is how to tell if someone wants to hurt you, so you can them avoid like the plague!

how to tell if someone wants to hurt you

Some people go into flirtations, and even relationships, with something else in mind other than good intentions. The good news, there are a few red flags. Knowing how to tell if someone wants to hurt you is all about looking for those warning signs and paying attention.

The chances are that you’re a kind-hearted person without negative intentions towards anyone. If you’re in a relationship with someone, you’re crushing on someone, you’re enjoying a flirt, you almost certainly have fun intentions in mind, not negative ones! But not everyone is like that.

Of course, it can be hard to extract yourself from someone you’ve grown close to. That is why so many people end up staying in relationships which make them unhappy. Some of these relationships even turn abusive. It’s certainly not a road you want to go down voluntarily.

Now, you’re reading my words, but I don’t know you as a person. What I do know is that nobody deserves to be hurt for no specific reason. It’s important that if you see these red flags, you pay attention to them. That doesn’t mean spotting one red flag on one occasion and running away because you’re scared a hurtful situation is on the horizon.

The chances are that if you simply notice one issue on one occasion, your partner is just being a little inconsiderate. We’re all a little inconsiderate from time to time! [Read: How to know if your relationship was toxic and how to get out of it fast]

How to tell if someone wants to hurt you: The 8 red flags to look for

So, here’s how to tell if someone wants to hurt you emotionally. First, remove yourself from the situation. Then, look for the person who will treat you right.

#1 They withhold information and act elusive. Someone who isn’t around when you expect them to be, and someone who doesn’t really tell you anything about what is going on in their lives doesn’t expect you to be in their life for long. It’s that simple.

If you’re always trying to guess what’s going on, putting two and two together and usually getting ten, or if you’re constantly on a mind-reading trip, it’s time to put down the questions. Find someone who is open and honest with you. [Read: 15 ways to spot selfish people and stop them from hurting you]

#2 They never make you a priority in their life. If you’re important to them, they’ll make time for you, even if it’s a small amount of time. If they’re not making you a priority, they aren’t taking you seriously. You don’t have to put up with that behavior.

Nobody is too busy to make time for people they care about or want to make happy. If you’re always begging for time and attention, raise your hand in a goodbye wave and walk away.

#3 They’re never wrong, and you always take the blame. One of the biggest ways to tell if someone wants to hurt you is that they always turn everything around and make you take the blame.

In this case, they don’t care that you’re hurting or that they’re causing you confusion. They simply want to shrug their way out of the blame and make you feel bad about everything instead. This is not someone you need in your life, for sure! [Read: The traits of toxic people that can hurt and damage you]

#4 They’re very jealous, and often try to make you jealous too. A person who wants the best for you would never want to make you feel insecure about your place in their life. If you’re with someone who always tries to make you jealous and worry about whether you’re the only one or not, they’re not bothered if they hurt you, or how you feel in general.

In addition, if they’re super-jealous of the other people in your life, that’s probably a reflection of their own behavior, mirroring back on them.

#5 You don’t feel you can trust them. If, when you really think about it, you don’t trust them as much as you want to, there’s a good reason for that. The chances are that this person isn’t giving you much of a reason to trust them. Put simply, there is no future for a relationship which isn’t built upon trust.

#6 Your intuition is screaming at you. You should always listen to your gut. It’s one of the best ways on how to tell if someone wants to hurt you. You will simply feel that something isn’t right, and you’ll see through most of the things they do, enough to give you a gut feeling in that direction.

Not everyone finds it easy to listen to their intuition. Simply sit and think about how you feel, taking into account any uneasy feelings in the pit of your stomach. Your gut will tell you all you need to know! [Read: 15 signs of a bad friend to always be on the lookout for]

#7 They don’t seem to care about your feelings or what’s going on in your life. Another sign to look for is someone who doesn’t seem to have much empathy in terms of your feelings. If you’re obviously down or upset about something that happened at work, and your partner or friend just doesn’t seem to care about it, they aren’t showing much respect for your feelings.

Also, if you’re excited about something and they don’t bother about hearing all about it, they’re not serious about you. Therefore, they have intentions to hurt you instead. Someone who leads another person on, put simply, doesn’t have good intentions. [Read: Stop from being played by learning the signs of a player]

#8 They’re not there when you need them. This one sounds odd, but trust me, it’s a sign someone is out to hurt you. When you’re developing feelings for someone and they’re not there when you need a shoulder to cry on, it hurts. Someone who is serious about you or starting to have feelings for you, will be there when you’re upset, down, angry, or sad. That’s just human nature when we have a connection with another person. If that red flag is waving high in the sky, it’s a definite sign to take  seriously.

These signs are pretty clear. These are all things we do on occasion, simply because we’re feeling a little selfish that day. But when these are shown over time, repeatedly, pay attention. We all have off days when we focus on ourselves and forget everyone around us. But it should not be an ongoing thing.

Learning how to tell if someone wants to hurt you really centers around the way they show their presence in your life. If they’re nowhere to be found unless there is something in it for them, seriously consider whether you want this person in your life at all.

[Read: 18 emotions you shouldn’t feel in a healthy relationship]

It can be hard to wave goodbye to someone you care about. If you want to know how to tell if someone wants to hurt you, that means you have slight doubts about the person in your life. 

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Nicky Curtis
Nicky Curtis
Having stumbled from one relationship drama to another throughout her 20s, Nicky is now somewhat of a guru in the crazy world of life and love. Telling it how i...
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