Sometimes life feels like a series of chores and obligations. If you want to learn how to be happy again, stop searching outside yourself and look within.
There are times in life where it is easy to get stuck in a rut. When you are there, every day seems like Groundhog Day. One morning you wake up, stop, and look around, and what you find is there isn’t really much that you find joy in or that makes you happy. If you want to know how to be happy again, it is all about retraining your brain, getting out of your funk, and thinking positive.
Happiness is not a static thing. It comes, and it goes. It is found in the small moments in life that you take in and hold with you.
20 ways to learn how to be happy again
The road to hell is paved with negativity. There is nothing that squashes someone’s happiness more than being negative in your thoughts, your anticipations, and your relationships. Like a cancer of the mind, you always expect the worst, and it leads to a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Because, no matter what reality is, all you see is negative in any experience. The key to life is whether the outcome is what you expected or not, to always find a silver lining.
If you want to know how to be happy again, it is about making these 20 simple changes that get you past your nay saying, move you closer to your goals, and make you realize that, even in the bleakest of times, there is a light shining, and you can learn how to be happy again. You may just have to look a little harder for it.
#1 Think positive. If you want to be happy again, then start thinking positively. We create our own reality. If you believe that only good things can come to you, then you perceive life in a completely different manner.
When you only think in positive terms, then there is no such thing as roadblocks or things that can get in your way. Your life’s journey is all wide-open paths to getting what you desire and what makes you happy. Thinking positive means never quitting or taking “no” for an answer. [Read: Positive vibes: 17 ways to welcome positive energy into your life]
#2 Always look for the silver lining. Even in the worst situations and outcomes, there is something positive to learn. Life is all about the experiences that we have with the world around us.
If you want to know how to be happy again, then always look for the good that comes from the journey. See all situations as fate and the way that it is supposed to be. Find the purest of joy in situations even when they don’t go how you want. That is the way to find happiness again.
#3 Take pride in small victories. Sometimes we focus solely on the big prize and negate the awesome victories along the way. For every two step forward, there may be one step back toward finding your happy place. But, the real happiness is found in each step and the incremental change that it creates in us and in our lives.
#4 Enjoy the journey. We get so fixated on the end game that we don’t stop to enjoy the excursion getting there. Life is like a road trip. It isn’t about getting to the destination alone, but the trip getting there.
Stop trying to rush through life to get to the end and relish in the time it takes, and the experiences you take with you all the way along the path. [Read: How to live in the now: 20 positive ways to live in the now]
#5 Don’t stay stuck. Nothing makes you unhappier than being stuck. The only one who keeps you stuck in a bad situation or something you don’t want to be in, is you. Even if you are in something that you don’t want to be, you always have two choices.
You can change things and make them better, or you can get out and move on. Staying stuck by not doing anything to change your circumstances is a sure-fire way to bring about unhappiness. If you want to be happy again, then only you alter things in your life to be the you, you want to be.
#6 Change those things that make you unhappy. Being happy isn’t about having everything you want, but wanting everything you have. If something is making you unhappy, then it is time to ditch it. Whatever it is, it isn’t worth holding onto or having it if it makes you unhappy.
If you want to know how to be happy again, it is about letting go of those things that don’t make you happy and finding those things that do.
#7 Dream again. If you are asking yourself how to be happy again, then you recognize that there was a time in the past when you were happy. Likely, somewhere along the way, you either forgot what the goal was or lost your dreams.
Dreams are the things that keep us going, make us feel alive, and give us hope that things can and will be what we want, if we hold on and make the best of things. If you have stopped dreaming, it is time to remember what your dreams were and start shooting for them again.
#8 Get rid of toxic relationships and friendships. Toxic relationships or friends are the biggest happiness killers that there are. The best way to be happy again is to ditch that person who is a negative force in your life or let go of the relationship dragging you down and making you unhappy.
There are times when two people just aren’t meant for each other and are nothing but toxic. It is okay to let go. Sometimes you must turn people loose, if they stand in the way of you being happy. [Read: How to recognize and end toxic relationships]
#9 Be present. Being happy means being present in your own life. That means not just going through the motions, but feeling all the emotions. If you want to find your happiness again, it might just be about taking the time to stop and look around and enjoying the little moments instead of letting them pass you by because you are continually on autopilot.
#10 Get your priorities in line. When you have your priorities all messed up, it is easy to become unhappy. Focusing your efforts or all your energy on the wrong things leaves you feeling empty and falling short.
If you want to be happy, then it might be time to look at where your priorities lie and find out if you are working toward what makes you happy or what you think others want. Prioritize what is important to you and make your happiness your number one goal
#11 Stop trying to control everything. Life is not to be controlled. It is wild and unpredictable, scary and overwhelming, and sad and happy, all at the same time. Unhappiness comes when you try too hard to control your life and what happens in it. Always thinking with your head and trying to anticipate outcomes leaves you feeling out of control and helpless. Those are two feelings that never lead to your happiness.
To find happiness, stop trying to control things and just let them come as they do. You can’t change everything. So, instead of fighting against life, work with it to get what you want and to find your happy place. [Read: 20 glaring signs you have a control freak in you]
#12 Stop comparing what you have to others. If you always look at what other people have that you don’t, then you won’t ever recognize your blessings. There is always going to be someone who appears to have more than you do, be happier than you are, and outwardly appear to have it all.
But, the truth is, you have everything you need inside of you to be happy. Stop comparing yourself to others or trying to live up to what they have, and be grateful for the things that you have.
#13 Give back. Giving back and volunteering for those around you who need help is a sure way to find happiness. It isn’t just that you recognize that people are much worse off than you, it just makes you feel good inside to help those less fortunate than you.
#14 Recognize your blessings. Everyone has been given blessings in life. Sure, some people have had a hard road or lost more things than others. But, if you have loved then you are blessed. Try to look at all the things you do have and forget about the things that you think are missing.
#15 Do what makes you happy. Taking time to do the things that make you happy are important. It is easy to get caught up and stop doing those things that make you happy. Life is too short to live it never doing what you want. If you want to find happiness, then find those moments and experiences that bring out your happy side. [Read: How to cheer yourself up: 21 ways to find your inner happiness]
#16 Make time for you. Stop living for everyone else and live for yourself. If you find you always have a little extra time to help everyone but never have alone time to make yourself happy, then start putting your own needs above others. You will find that being “selfish” is a good thing for your happiness.
#17 Learn to say no. Stop saying yes to everyone who needs you or your help. Saying yes might feel good if you are a pleaser. But, chances are that you don’t feel so happy when you would rather be doing something else. Or, you are not doing what you are supposed to because you are too busy doing things for other people. Learning to say no to others can be one of the best things to gain freedom and find happiness again.
#18 Unleash your mind. Stop thinking that things aren’t possible. Anything is possible if you set your mind to it. Think outside the box to get what you want and never convince yourself out of something. Go all in to get what you want and to make yourself happy.
#19 Unplug. Happiness is not found on a computer screen. It is found in the faces of those you love. If you want to find happiness, stop building a life and friendships on Facebook and create a real life and connections around you. Put your electronics away and start living in this world, that is the best way to learn how to be happy again. [Read: Sabotaging your happiness: 12 ways you can ruin your life]
#20 Exercise. Exercise helps you chase away any feelings of depression or moodiness that may be keeping you stuck unhappy. Keeping physically strong contributes to keeping you the same mentally. Healthy goes hand-in-hand with happiness, so hit the great outdoors, or the gym, to find your smiley face.
[Read: How to feel happy: 13 proven strategies for instant happiness]
If you are asking how to be happy again, then you were happy at one time. That is a good thing. All you have to do is find out what changed and find your way back. Happiness doesn’t come from outside; it comes from within.