Just as there are several red flags to spot in men, there are also relationship red flags in women. Spot them and avoid a mistake!
She looks perfect. She’s everything you wanted in a partner, but some things about her make you second-guess yourself. You’re picking up on some of the relationship red flags in women and it’s setting off your internal alarm system.
When you know how to spot the significant red flags, you save yourself a lot of drama and toxicity in the relationship. It prevents you from making a huge mistake and dating the wrong person. [Read: These signs of disrespect in a relationship reveal a lack of love]
Why is it important to spot red flags?
Knowing how to spot red flags saves you a lot of trouble in your relationship. We often end up in toxic and manipulative relationships because we fail to spot the warning signs early on. We’re so blinded by their good qualities that we ignore the red flashing lights completely, even if they’re obvious.
These red flags don’t just go for men but also women. When you know to spot relationship red flags in women, it prevents you from being in the wrong relationship. For instance, having different values is already a red flag you should never ignore.
Many guys get into a relationship, thinking they can change her mind, but that rarely happens. Most often, it’s the guy that ends up changing for her because of those contrasting values. [Read: 15 BIG red flags in a relationship you should never explain away]
20 red flags in women that truly spell danger
There are some things you shouldn’t accept in a relationship. Of course, there will be some things she does that may annoy you, but they’re not harmful to you or your relationship – like if she snorts when she laughs or always forgets where she puts her keys.
Those aren’t things to worry about. But if she’s rude to her family, never apologizes for her bad behavior, or belittles you on a daily basis, then this is something you need to take a look at. In other words, those are some serious red flags. [Read: 17 relationship red flags that most people completely ignore]
1. You don’t share the same values
Now this doesn’t make her a terrible person, but it definitely will lead to a dead end in your romance eventually. If you want to have a healthy and happy relationship, you should aim to find someone who shares similar values. They say that opposites attract, but this isn’t entirely true.
When your values and beliefs reflect the essence of who you are, it’s crucial to find someone who at least shares some of those beliefs. If you value family and want to have children one day, then look for a woman who wants those things.
If she’s told you she doesn’t want kids, then you two aren’t on the same page. You can’t change her mind, and it’s not your responsibility to do so. [Read: The signs she’s not emotionally ready to be in a relationship with you]
2. She’s violent when upset
Maybe you had an argument. It’s not something unusual; every relationship has its moments. But instead of talking things out with you, she’ll hit you or throw things at you. The scary thing about this is you don’t spot this red flag right away.
If she tends to be highly aggressive when angry, it’s an automatic red flag you should never disregard. [Read: 10 ways to handle dating someone with anger issues]
3. You have completely different lifestyles
It’s not an unhealthy red flag, but it matters just as much when dating someone. So if you’re seeing this girl and you both happen to have contrasting lifestyles, it rarely goes the distance. One of you will end up sacrificing and adjusting for the other.
But if you are both concrete with your lifestyles and aren’t interested in changing, then this isn’t going to work. If she doesn’t want to live a similar life as you, then there will be a constant struggle. [Read: Do opposites attract or do they push each other apart?]
4. She just left a serious relationship
This is one of the biggest red flags in women guys tend to ignore, but it’s a massive one. Regardless of if it’s a man or woman, when it comes to fresh breakups, do not attempt to get into a relationship with them. She didn’t move on – it’s only been a week.
She needs time to heal, so the fact that she’s already dating means she’s either using you as a rebound or a fling. Even if you end up successfully dating, she’ll just end up projecting all her issues and heartbreak on you.
If you’re dating a girl who’s dealing with a fresh break *and they talk about their ex a lot*, don’t push the relationship further. [Read: Dating a girl on the rebound – How to date her and not get hurt]
5. She says all her exes were jerks
This is equivalent to men saying all their exes were crazy. How could all of someone’s exes be either crazy or jerks? Maybe they were all jerks, so it should make you think why she goes for those types of men. This could also mean she doesn’t take responsibility for her actions and shifts blame onto others.
It could also mean that her exes weren’t the jerks, but she was. We never really admit our faults in a breakup, right? It’s much easier to blame the other person, even when it takes two for a breakup to occur.
6. You’ve caught her lying
Honesty is a crucial factor in relationships. If you’ve caught her in a lie, this isn’t something you should overlook. Of course, we all say white lies, but even those are tricky. Lying will always be a red flag, no matter the excuse.
The fact that she had the audacity to lie to you *assuming it’s not something minor like how you look or your outfit*, then it’s a red flag you shouldn’t ignore. This might even mean she’s that used to lying, and she feels no remorse whatsoever for it. [Read: 15 ways a pathological liar hurts and confuses you with their lies]
7. It’s her way or the highway
When going into a relationship with someone, you want to be with someone who can compromise for the good of the relationship. This also means you should be willing to compromise as well. This is one of the red flags for women that’s such a deal-breaker in relationships, especially since compromise is everything.
If she never meets you halfway or comes up with a lame excuse to always get things her way, she might be incapable of compromise. [Read: Selfish people: 20 ways to spot and stop them from emptying you]
8. She’s disrespectful to her parents
Our parents aren’t perfect, but that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t respect them. If she’s anywhere near rude and disrespectful to her parents, that’s an obvious red flag. If she’s disrespectful to them, just think about how she’ll be to you in the future.
This is another one of the red flags people often overlook. After all, it’s normal to have issues with our parents, right? Wrong. How she treats her parents is exactly how she’ll treat you when you get on her nerves. [Read: 14 first date red flags that speak more than your date says]
9. She quickly becomes obsessive
You just started seeing each other, but she’s already calling you a couple of times a day and checking up on where you are. This isn’t a good sign. It might seem cute, but it’s going to be a problem in your relationship.
There’s a difference between checking up on you because she misses you and flooding you with a hundred texts because she’s obsessive. Do yourself a favor and don’t ignore this red flag – you’ll thank us in the long run! [Read: The complete list of warning signs you have an obsessive girlfriend]
10. She doesn’t take responsibility for her behavior
Maybe she was rude to a waiter or she overstepped herself with your friend. She could have apologized and learned from her mistakes, or she could deflect from the situation and place the blame on someone or something else.
You need a partner who knows how to be accountable for their mistakes and takes responsibility for them. So if she always blames anyone but herself, this is one of the red flags in women you should never ignore.
11. She’s unappreciative
You pick her up from work every day or cook dinner for her, and all these actions show you care and appreciate her. But appreciation is a two-way street. It’s already a red flag if she doesn’t know how to appreciate your efforts just because they’re not in the form of grand gestures or material things.
If she never says “thank you” when you go out of your way to do something for her, she’s clearly an unappreciative person by nature and very picky with gestures. [Read: 16 discreet signs you’re being taken for granted in your relationship]
12. She’s already used the “L” word
There’s no standard timeframe on when to say you love someone the first time. But if it’s only been a couple of dates, and she’s throwing out the “L” word like it’s nothing, it’s a red flag.
The word “love” isn’t something anyone should use lightly, ever. It’s a big word to use in a relationship, and the fact that she’s using it lightly means she doesn’t mean it. [Read: What is love bombing and how to spot the manipulation early on]
13. She makes you feel bad about yourself
When you’re dating someone, they should make you feel like you’re on top of the world. Instead, they insult you and poke at your self-esteem. She brings out your absolute worst and makes you feel worst than you already do.
This is one of the red flags in women you should never ignore as a partner should support you, not put you down. She doesn’t want to make you smile; she wants to feel superior. [Read: These 15 types of bad girlfriends will make your life hell]
14. She puts you on a pedestal
While it can feel good initially, being put on a pedestal is never a good thing. When you do something wrong, you’ll feel just why it’s a red flag you should watch out for.
She believes you’re perfect and can do no harm, so when you actually do something imperfect and flawed, you’ll receive her disappointment. In other words, her expectations of you are so high that it puts pressure on nobody else but you.
15. She doesn’t respect your boundaries
No matter what, boundaries will always be significant in a relationship. It teaches the other person how to respect and love you accordingly. So when she doesn’t respect your boundaries no matter what, it’s one of the red flags in women you should watch out for.
The fact that she doesn’t respect your boundaries means she also doesn’t respect you as a person. [Read: How to set personal boundaries & guide other people to respect it]
16. Your friends and family all don’t like her
We love thinking that love can conquer all – that it’s that powerful. However, if your friends and family all don’t like her, then there’s something wrong with her to begin with. It’s easy to be blinded when you really like the person, after all. But if all your friends and family don’t like her, then something’s wrong with her.
There’s something they clearly see that you don’t, and that’s why it’s one of the biggest red flags in women you should never ignore. If they don’t like her, listen to your loved ones.
17. She has no work ethic
If she’s never stuck around in a company or work for a long period, it’s a red flag. This means she gets bored quickly, has no goals and ambitions, or has no work ethic. A person’s work ethic isn’t everything, but you can already foresee how the relationship will go if you date someone without a work ethic.
You need to date someone who shares your level of ambition if you don’t want this to be a big problem later on. [Read: Dating a workaholic: 20 signs and tips to maintain a happy relationship]
18. She cheated on her last partner for you
So cheating will always be a red flag, no matter what. But if she cheated on her last partner to be with you, it’s one of the biggest red flags in women you can’t ignore.
The fact that she cheated on her partner to be with you means she can do it again when the time comes. If you think you’re lucky because she chose you, think again. Cheating is one of the biggest red flags in relationships. [Read: Women who cheat: 10 surprising reasons they’re unfaithful]
19. She always guilt trips you
Guilt is the one emotion used by manipulators and narcissists often because they know it works every time. If she loves using guilt to get what she wants every time, it’s a red flag.
A relationship should never be about manipulation and guilt-tripping, as these things lead to a toxic and abusive relationship in the first place.
20. There’s an apparent double standard
They don’t want to be treated a certain way, but it’s completely okay when they do it. These double standards are never healthy and should never be observed in relationships. This is one of the red flags in women that when you spot, walk away from the relationship immediately. [Read: 12 double standards in relationships & why they’re toxic AF]
Can you spot any of these red flags?
You’ll do yourself a favor by spotting the red flags early on in the relationship. This prevents a lot of heartbreak and devastation on your end just because you dated the wrong woman and wasted your time.
[Read: Loving a narcissist – How to tell if you’ve fallen for a narcissist]
When dating, make sure you look out for these red flags in women. Disregarding these red flags all because you choose to focus on the good in someone will cost you in unfavorable ways later on.
