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Man Crush: 20 Signs & Why It’s Okay to Crush on the Same Gender

You’ve heard of a bromance, but what is a man crush? And, do you have one? Don’t worry, it’s nothing to be too concerned about in most cases!

man crush

What is a man crush? It is when another man has a crush on another man. You might panic when you read that definition – does having a crush on another man make you gay?

Probably not, although for some, it could be the case. There are always people we meet in our lives who make our everything much more fun. They just get us and are super fun to be around.

After all, a crush isn’t always about having romantic feelings. Sometimes it just means you can’t get enough of being around someone. [Read: Who is your main squish? 15 signs you’re squishing on someone]

The key differences between a man crush and a bromance

You’ve no doubt heard the term ‘bromance,’ so what is the difference between a bromance and a man crush, exactly? They’re similar but have one very key difference.

When a bromance is going on, two guys are enjoying spending time together, can’t get enough of being around one another, and people jokingly say “oh they’re in a bromance”.

When you have a man crush, it’s totally one-sided. You look at a particular guy and you want to be around them more, or maybe you want to be more like them. Again, both bromances and man crushes don’t necessarily have to be about romantic feelings or anything beyond platonic.

In some cases, they could end up going that way, but that’s just something you have to go with if or when it arises. [Read: Male bonding vs female bonding – What are the main differences?]

It’s possible to have a man crush on a celebrity, someone in authority, a person you’ve never met but only seen online or from a distance, or someone you work with, someone you’re friends with, the list goes on.

The subtle signs you have a man crush on a guy and don’t realize it

How do you know if you have a man crush? When you are crushing on someone, it means they bring excitement into your life that you don’t normally feel with other people.

If you get tingly feelings inside when one of your friends comes around, that is just one sign you have a man crush. However, there are many additional signs you might be crushing. Let’s check them out. [Read: Why do men need male friends?]

1. You get all giddy when they’re around

Sure, guys night is fun, and you look forward to it all week. When you have a man crush, then you are just excited about hanging out with your one “bestie.” It is specific and one step up.

When you see them, see their text message, or just think about them, it gives you butterflies in your stomach. [Read: Queer platonic relationship and 25 signs you may already be in one]

2. You worry if they approve of what you wear

Like fitting in, you want your man crush to think you are the trendiest and coolest guy around.

If you change your outfit about ten times and fidget with it while you wait for him to arrive, then there is a good chance you have a man crush.

3. You text them, like, all the time

If you can’t seem to find enough reasons in the world to text, then you probably have a man crush. Sending images to make them laugh, funny antidotes, and just “hey” all day long.

If you can’t put your phone away, or worse yet, wait to see the dots that mean they’re answering you back, you’re in deep. [Read: Texting your crush: A step-by-step guide to doing it right]

4. You stalk their social media

With a man crush, you want to make sure they like you as much as you do them. Stalking their social media to make sure that they aren’t hanging out with someone else and leaving you in the lurch is just a part of what you will do to spy on them.

5. You get jealous when they talk to other guys

If you do uncover a third wheel, then it doesn’t make you happy. Worse yet, if they do something super cool and you find out that you weren’t invited, that is grounds for being pissed.

It’s okay if they have superficial conversations with other “friends,” but the serious talk should be left for the two of you. [Read: Jealousy vs envy – How to tell them apart when they feel the same]

6. You try to look and talk like them, to some degree

When you have a man crush, you want to look just like them, dress just like them, and talk just like them. Why? Because there is nothing cooler than your “it” guy. If you can’t date him, you might as well be him. [Read: How to be a good friend – 49 traits and friend codes that make a true pal]

7. You dress up whenever you know they’re coming over

If they come over to hang out and play video games, and you shower and put on some cologne, that might just be a sign that you have a man crush. Trying to look nice for a guy’s night isn’t a thing when it is just guys.

8. You clean your apartment when they’re coming over

Again, if you go above and beyond guy duty to impress another man, that might just scream man crush. Guys are supposed to be laid back and not give a shit.

If you are typically one of them but find yourself scurrying around to pick things up, you are crushing. [Read: What is peacocking? Why men instinctively indulge in peacocking]

9. You care what they think of you

Another cute thing guys do to one another is call them out, razz them, and make fun of one another. If your man crush says something to you and you get all butt hurt, then you might consider that you have some pretty special feelings for someone.

10. You find yourself suddenly rooting for their sports teams

It is your duty as a man to have some loyalty to a team. Whether it is your college sports team or your hometown, if you change your team loyalty due to what another man likes, that spells MAN CRUSH. [Read: 43 Things to talk about with your crush & make them think of you]

11. You find ways to see them, like, all the time

Talking on the phone isn’t enough? Stalking is a huge sign of a man crush. Constantly interjecting yourself into their good times, inviting yourself along on every excursion, or just showing up at their house or place of business to see if they want to “hang out.” These are all signs that you have a man crush.

12. You worry a little about your feelings for them

The fact that you are even reading this means you either suspect you have a man crush or you fear someone has one on you. The fact that you acknowledge that something is a little “off,” says it all, man crush. [Read: Does liking a man mean I’m gay?]

13. You prefer being with them over your girlfriend

If you choose your man crush over your girl, even when your girl gets super pissed, then they mean more to you than the lady in your life. That means two things, either you should start looking for a new main squeeze or you have a man crush.

14. You find yourself liking everything they do

If even the way that they puke after they had too much to drink is the best thing in the world, then you might be dealing with a man crush.

Guys aren’t supposed to like or approve of everything other guys do, even if as a friend you pretend to. If you really do, then you might have a bit of a crush. [Read: How to get over a crush and have fun doing it]

15. You use all their new phrases as if it’s a “thing”

Not only do you start to talk like your crush, you two have sayings that only you know, understand, and use. If you have your own “it phrases” then we have good news and bad news.

The bad news is that you probably have a man crush, the good news is that it might be returned. If that’s the case, you move into bromance territory.

16. You feel hurt or pushed out when they want to go out with their girlfriend

If you can’t let them have their own time away, especially with the girl they like or are dating, then that spells jealousy. Where does jealousy come from? Well, your man crush, of course.

17. You hate a third wheel, typically because you don’t know you are it

Hey Dupree, wake up, you might think your man wants you there all the time but either he doesn’t have the balls to tell you he doesn’t. Or, his girlfriend is too polite to tell you she thinks it is weird and you need to step off. [Read: The third wheel – 32 perks, annoyances and the guide to survive being one]

18. The smell of them makes you feel turned on, or slightly tingly

Okay, you may get a little turned on when you walk into an Abercrombie store, but they are designed that way. If the mere smell of a guy makes your mind tingle, that isn’t normal for just friendship and might just spell C-R-U-S-H, or possibly even more.

19. You not only notice but compliment their new haircut

This one is a no-brainer. Even IF you notice a guy got a new haircut, that is something you keep to yourself. And, even if you think it looks nice, again, you keep it to yourself. [Read: The 60 bromandments: Bro code rules every guy should live by]

20. You get every round

If you get every round of drinks when you are out with a guy, it says one of two things. Either you are a tool *’cause you are being used*, or you try to impress them by throwing cash around. If it is the latter, that is a sign you just might be in the midst of a man crush.

What should you do about a man crush?

Typically, nothing. A man crush is generally harmless and you may find that over time, it eases and you start to see them as just another guy friend.

However, in some cases, a man crush can then develop into a bromance. If that’s the case, your friend has seen that you’re just as wonderful as you think they are, and they’re crushing back! [Read: Does he have a crush on me? 20 Signs he just can’t hide]

Generally speaking, having a man crush isn’t something you should worry about at all. Many guys panic and think it means that they’re gay, but most of the time, that’s not the case at all.

If it does prove to be the case in the end, work through your feelings carefully and don’t feel rushed or pressured into making any moves until you’re ready. It might turn out to be a wake up call, it might simply be a transient thing. You never know.

Most man crushes are completely platonic and non-sexual. It can be a little alarming to suddenly start having these slightly over-the-top feelings towards another guy when it’s never happened before. However, you should just embrace them and see it as a positive.

It means you’ve met someone you really vibe with and that means a really deep friendship can develop. Rather than panicking about what it might mean for your sexuality, just go with the flow and allow the truth to unravel naturally. Nine times out of ten, man crushes aren’t a sexual deal at all.

So basically, just go with it and try not to overthink your feelings!

[Read: Platonic crush – What this means and how to proceed platonically]

The good news is that we all have crushes on people of the same sex. Don’t be embarrassed by your man crush; we’ve all been in your shoes before, so stop freaking out about it and go with the flow!

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