A busty girlfriend. You either want one or can’t get your hands off one. So here are the pros and cons of having a buxom babe to call your own.
With great racks come great responsibilities. And if you are gifted with a busty girlfriend, then you’re in luck. You have one—no, two—of nature’s masterpieces, a big pair of boobs, at your disposal.
And it’s completely normal to be over-the-moon about having a busty girlfriend. After all, an ample bosom embodies everything that is woman: softness, nurturing, curves, maternity, and sexuality.
However, big boobs also come with their own set of problems to make you think: Is it really worth it?
Well, here we weigh in on the pros and cons of having a busty girlfriend. You decide.
Pros of having a busty girlfriend
There are many advantages to having a girlfriend with a bra size like those of Sofia Vergara, Christina Hendricks, and Pamela Anderson. Here they are:
#1 Best hugs. Having a busty girlfriend means you get the warmest, tightest, softest hugs because those jugs are so comfortable that you can just sink into them forever.
#2 Looks great in a t-shirt. A busty girlfriend can also fill out a shirt pretty damn well. In fact, they can wear practically anything and look hot in it, since an ample bosom can make any girl look more feminine and proportionate.
#3 Even better in a tank. While t-shirts look great on your busty girlfriend, she looks even better in a tank top. The tank hugs her body even more, giving her a curvier shape that you, and other onlookers, will appreciate for sure. [Read: Why do guys like breasts like crazy?]
#4 She can make bikinis look illegal on her. Shirts and tanks are nothing compared to when your buxom lady wears a bikini. Va-va-voom. Need we say more?
#5 What about in lingerie? While there’s no doubt she’ll be looking hands-down hot naked, there’s still something to be said about those jugs being covered gingerly by lace and silk. Every time she shows up in lingerie, it’s like you have a pinup model all for your viewing—and touching—pleasure.
#6 Respect nods from other guys. Another perk of having a beautifully endowed girlfriend is you’ll get nods of approval, if not admiration and envy, from other guys as you walk around with her in your arms. Talk about ultimate arm candy. [Read: How to touch a woman’s breasts on a date]
#7 Soft cushion. You have a pillow when you cuddle. After some nookie, you hug each other and it just feels comforting to lie on one of her big breasts. Like a little boy coming home.
#8 Something to tickle and squeeze. Of course, compared to skinny, small-breasted girls, having one with big bumpers means more to love. Those lovelies are something to jiggle, tickle, touch, tease, fondle and squeeze.
#9 Boob slaps. Ever get boob slapped before? If not, you better have one *or two*. You’ll love it. [Read: Men love staring at a girl’s breasts]
#10 Wardrobe malfunctions. A busty girlfriend means her clothes will struggle to cover her, especially as she leans and moves about. And as her boyfriend, you are witness to these sexy wardrobe malfunctions.
#11 Hours of fun. Big bumpers are big bags of fun as there’s really more to touch, and there’s more of your girlfriend to love. Your eyes and hands will have more to enjoy with a well-endowed frontage.
#12 Motorboat. Nothing can break the ice more effectively *especially after a fight* than laying your girlfriend on her back, straddling her between your legs, and motorboating her amble bosom. Her frowns will turn into laughs, and instantly, you have a go-to move to stop her from getting angry at you.
#13 Spillage is sexy. If she spills her drink on herself, it just looks so damn sexy. Just looking at how the quid trickles down her cleavage and getting lost under her low neckline is enough to turn you on. [Read: How to tell if your girlfriend’s breasts aren’t real]
#14 Perks. She can get into any crowded club, get free drinks, and basically just have her way in life because she’s got her ta-tas for tickets. If she plays her cards right, she might even get you out of some traffic trouble with her bust and her charm.
#15 Big tits never take a day off. Having a busty girlfriend means you have an eat-all-you-can-buffet of boobs, a sky-is-the-limit-type of enjoyment, especially if you are indeed a boob guy. You have something some other guys only hope to get their hands on, but you are all over those puppies 24/7—and you love it.
Cons
Still, big boobs also come with their own set of disadvantages. Here goes:
#1 They can get in the way. Big boobs, especially the DDDs to the JJs *bigger than those is really just absurd* can render your girlfriend unable to perform certain things in the bedroom.
Those puppies can get in the way of missionary, and you can’t be as close to her as you want because it would feel like there’s two baby heads getting squished between you two. [Read: Is it bad to stare at a woman’s breasts?]
#2 You’ll have to buy her a bra. Getting her a bra can be a tad bit more expensive, if not hard to find. This is true especially for those with incredibly huge ones. But really, it’s gonna be worth it so it’s not really a disadvantage…
#3 When you don’t want the world to see it. Having a busty girlfriend can also be a disadvantage if you’re the jealous type. You just want to keep all those glorious jugs to yourself and you don’t like other guys lusting after the sight of your well-rounded girlfriend.
#4 Attracts too much attention. Those big boobs don’t fold up and get tucked away whenever you or she wants to. The best thing you can do is talk to your girlfriend and ask her to wear something less revealing, or even employ some optical illusions on her clothing so her chest wouldn’t look so big.
However, big is big and those ta-tas will really have a way of getting noticed. [Read: Fun and fascinating facts about breasts]
#5 The “Are those real?” looks. Among the approving and envious looks will be those who will think her breasts are fake. Your family might even see her for the first time and accuse you of spending your hard-earned money to get her implants. [Read: Fake boobs alert: How to tell if a girl’s boobs aren’t real]
#6 Guys will flirt. If it hasn’t happened yet, trust us, it soon will. When alone, your girlfriend will be approached by guys who are interested in her, or more specifically, her curves. Guys would tend to flock around her thinking she’s single, and even if you’re there, they may even flirt—which can get you in a lot of trouble.
#7 You’ll get paranoid. Since so many guys are into her, you might catch yourself thinking some paranoid/jealous thoughts: “Is she seeing other guys?” “Did she flirt back with that guy?” “Why does he keep looking at her?” “Why is her office mate always talking to her?” These are enough to make you go cuckoo if left unchecked.
#8 She can look slutty even in the most modest clothes. Even for the most conservative woman, looking the part can be hard because she just has the body of a porn star.
Even if she dresses in the squarest getup that would make even the Brady Bunch proud, she’d still look slutty. [Read: 12 signs you have a slutty girlfriend – Be proud of it!]
#9 Can’t see past the boobies. Unfortunately, for some people can’t see past the cleavage to what really matters. Some people won’t even talk to your girl straight in the eye because they’re fixated on her breasts.
So even if she has two master’s degrees, 5 Ph.D.s, an empire, and an awesome personality, people will almost always prejudge her to be a bimbo.
#10 Back problems. Be prepared for after-work to late-at-night complaints about back aches. She’ll be having lots of those, especially since those jugs aren’t balloons. They can weigh a lot and walking around with them can be tiring. So be prepared for crankiness, and be prepared to give back rubs.
#11 Expect stretchmarks. If you’re really into her *and not just her boobs, bless you human*, then it might also mean you’re in it for the long haul. You may want to have kids with her, and even grow old with her.
We won’t sugar coat this: there will be stretchmarks, and her once-glorious boobies will sag. Expect gravity to do its work, my friend.
[Read: How to stare at a woman’s breasts without getting caught]
Now that it’s all been said and done, it looks like having a busty girlfriend rocks, 15-11. So give yourself a pat in the back if you already have one. If not, then you better make it part of your bucket list to get yourself a well-endowed chick, even if just once in your life.