Relationships aren’t always easy, and they take a lot of work. So, if you’re wondering how to keep a girl interested, we have all the answers you need.
There is nothing greater than falling in love. In reverse, however, there is quite arguably nothing worse than falling out of it. If you want to know how to keep a girl interested, it will take a little work on your part. But it’s worth it.
Too often, guys get way too comfortable believing that a girl is going to love them forever, and so they stop putting in the effort. Sure, you shouldn’t need to put on a suit and tie and take your girl out to a fancy restaurant every night, but that isn’t what most girls want anyway.
If you want to make sure that she adores you for a lifetime, you have to hold her attention, make her feel special, and do those little things that mean so much. Learning how to keep a girl interested is about caring for her, not tricking her.
[Read: How to make a girl think about you and miss you all day]
This feature is all about learning how to keep a girl interested in you when you’re dating or in a relationship with her.
If you’re looking to catch a girl’s attention when you’re not yet dating, and make her get interested in you, check out this guide on how to get a girl’s attention and her interest even before you say a word to her!
But if you’re wondering about your girlfriend’s interest in you, read on, because we have everything you need to keep a girl really interested in you and happy to be with you as well!
Is she losing interest?
Since you came seeking answers, there’s a good chance you are already doing a lot of these things. Are you worried your girl is losing interest? Does it seem like it? Is she really? Or are you dealing with low self-esteem?
If things have recently changed in your relationship, you may be right. Is your girlfriend backing away? Is she distant? Perhaps things just feel off?
If you care enough to search for ways to keep her interested, you are probably doing many great things already. Yet, there is always room for improvement. Good on you for wanting to be even better. [Read: How to make your girlfriend feel lucky and loved by you]
How to keep a girl interested and happy to be with you
Learning how to keep a girl interested in you doesn’t have to be all that complicated. Usually, if you’re a good guy and you two have a good connection, your risk is pretty low.
But, there is a fine line to walk. If you are too nice, you run the risk of losing her interest. No one likes a doormat. If you play too hard to get, she may find it just too exhausting, always trying to get your attention.
If you want to know how to keep a girl interested, then you have to treat her right and have fun.
1. Don’t let yourself go
Even if you got here and you have professed your love for one another, it isn’t cool to let yourself go. When you don’t take care of yourself, it says you’re losing interest. You don’t want to stop bathing and taking care of general hygiene just because you know she likes you.
Sure, looks shouldn’t be a priority in a relationship, but this isn’t about looks. Taking care of yourself is about putting some effort into yourself. You get dressed, brush your hair, put on cologne, not to impress her but to put your best foot forward.
It shows that you care about yourself. She will see that and remain attracted to the effort you put into yourself. [Read: 21 things you do that’ll make your girlfriend adore you a lot more]
2. Bring her gifts
Gifts don’t have to be expensive. In fact, they don’t have to cost anything at all. Anything from a post-it note saying “you look hot today” to a single beautiful flower that you picked up on the way home tells her that she is always on your mind and makes her feel appreciated.
Never stop trying to make her happy, which includes bringing her surprise gifts from the heart.
Remember, this could be anything from some fast-food french fries to a silly t-shirt you thought would make her smile. Gifts aren’t about the money but about the thought put into them.
3. Be mysterious
When you become a couple, it is easy to let your guard down and get comfortable with each other. Comfort is great, and it doesn’t mean you should leave the bathroom door open or leave your beard shavings in the sink. The mystery isn’t about being secretive, but just not giving away everything.
Regardless of how long you have been together, there are just some things that you should keep to yourself and remain a mystery. [Read: Do girls fart? This and 15 other mysteries demystified!]
4. Don’t be selfish in bed
As time goes on, it may take a little more to turn each other on. That may mean that you have to put in some creative effort to satisfy her sexually. What you did the first few times may become routine.
Of course, you want to enjoy sex, but make sure that you are making her pleasure a priority as well.
If you can’t come up with something new and original yourself, ask her. A great way to keep a girl interested is by caring enough to ask rather than assuming you know what she wants. [Read: 18 sex tips for men to make her crave for a lot more]
5. Be a gentleman
Just because you are a couple, that doesn’t mean that you don’t have to open the door for her, pull her seat out for her at dinner, or pay for her. Some courtesies shouldn’t ever be overlooked.
It isn’t the ’50s, but she still deserves that special treatment. Offer your sweater if it’s cold, help her carry anything heavy. These things shouldn’t disappear because you’re committed. She will appreciate the effort and remain interested. [Read: 15 courteous ways to be a gentleman and keep her happy]
6. Challenge her
Not every woman wants a “yes” man. Of course, it is okay to agree with her, but she also needs someone in her life who challenges her. If you disagree with her, don’t just nod along. Have deep conversations about things you disagree on.
You want to encourage each other to be better. You want to challenge her and ask tough questions. Without this, things can get boring really quickly.
7. Be there for her
In reverse, when she needs a shoulder to cry on, be hers. There is a time to push, and then there is a time to pull her in and make her feel loved and secure. If she needs to vent or just cry something out, simply hold her.
She isn’t always looking for someone to fix her problems. Sometimes, she wants an ear to listen without judgment. If you want to keep her interested, be her friend too. [Read: How to become a better person in your relationship]
8. Compliment her
If you think that she looks beautiful, let her know. Don’t assume you said it enough. Each compliment makes a difference.
A simple “you look sexy today” will brighten her world and make her feel like you still see her as special as you did when you met. It isn’t too hard to pay attention. Also, compliments should go above and beyond her looks. [Read: 20 genuine compliments she will love to hear and always remember]
9. Never stop flirting
Remember those sexual innuendos that you used to make about the way she looked in her jeans? Or, how you brushed up against her just to feel her shoulder against yours?
How long has it been since you treated her like you were still trying to catch her eye and flirt with her? If you want to know how to keep a girl interested in you, never stop flirting with her and letting her know that if you had to choose someone all over again, you would still choose her.
10. Make her your priority
It is easy to get comfortable with each other and to start taking one another for granted. If you want to keep her interested, make sure she always knows that she is your priority.
That doesn’t mean that you can’t go out with the guys or you have to put her first, just show her you care. If you do care, it isn’t hard to show it. [Read: How to treat a woman right – 15 ways to make her want to stay]
11. Don’t let her take advantage of you
There are some girls out there who will test the outer limits of your relationship. She may want to see how much control she has over you. If you always let her win, do what she wants, never voice your opinion, or do whatever she says at her whim, then she’ll use you and get bored.
Learn how to say no and stand up for yourself. If she is disrespecting you, call her out. You both deserve to be treated well. Letting her know you won’t be treated poorly may be what she needs to keep her on her toes and make her that much more interested in you. [Read: 20 signs of a bad girlfriend who’ll make your life a living hell]
12. Continue to surprise her
It isn’t hard to start getting bored with one another. If you want to keep her interested in you, you have to continue trying new things to keep the relationship fresh.
Get a new sex toy, plan a surprise vacation, or make a big deal out of her for no reason at all. The art of surprise is undeniably the best tip for how to keep a girl interested in you. [Read: 20 sweet ways to make your girlfriend incredibly happy]
13. Appreciate her
In relationships, we often start to take on roles and expect things from each other. Those things, however, should never be taken for granted. If she continues to wash your dirty underwear and clean up the dishes, don’t take her for granted. Make sure she knows you appreciate all she does for you, no matter how routine.
If you stop appreciating the things she does or take them for granted, she will likely start to look around for someone else who will appreciate the many things she does. Saying “thank you” goes a LONG way! [Read: How to know if you’re the selfish one in your relationship]
14. Ask her about herself
It doesn’t matter how long you’ve been together. There is always more to learn about each other. Keep asking her questions. Ask her about her day, her friends, how her sister’s new job is going.
Showing her that you’re interested in all aspects of her life and want to know what’s going on with her will keep her interested.
15. Plan dates
The burden of planning dating often falls to the girl. If you want to know how to keep her interested, plan things yourself. Schedule a night out, make reservations, take her somewhere she has never been. You can even plan a double date.
It isn’t that hard to take her out and make sure she isn’t working on the plans. She will really appreciate a night off from planning. [Read: The best 50 date ideas to wow and amaze your girl]
16. Open up
Don’t shut down. Sure, you want to be a little mysterious, but you need to be able to open up to her. If you shut down your emotions or stop opening up after a certain point, she will feel like you’ve hit a wall in your relationship.
She wants to understand you better and needs you to talk to her in order to do that. [Read: 30 things to talk about with your girlfriend]
17. Stay in touch
Text her throughout the day. You don’t need to be talking 24/7, but ask her how her day is going. Send her a funny meme. Let her know you’re thinking about her.
A lot of women lose interest when their guy stops putting in that effort. They think they don’t need to keep trying because they’re committed, but you need to let her know your interest is still there just as you want hers to be.
18. Talk about where things are going
Talk about the relationship. A lot of people hate this talk, but without it, she may be so confused she loses interest.
If you really want to keep her interested, you need to be willing to have a possibly awkward conversation about how you’re feeling, what you want, and what she wants. [Read: The 25 best relationship topics to talk about if you want to keep your girl happy]
19. Maintain respect
You both need to demand respect and offer it. This is so important. Without respect, every part of a relationship crumbles. The second some women are disrespected, they will lose interest.
If it feels like you are being mean or things just feel less than right, talk about it openly and honestly. Make sure you know what respect means to both of you and how to show it.
20. Keep up the intimacy
Intimacy is more than sex. It is putting your arm around her when you’re watching a movie, brushing her hair out of her face, and kissing her goodnight. Those small touches are important to keep her interested.
When you stop touching her with those sweet intentions, she will feel like you’re pulling away and will pull away herself. [Read: 20 types of physical touches and what each touch means]
21. Keep focusing on you
Don’t let the relationship absorb all your attention and focus. To keep a girl interested, you have to be amazing as you’ve always been. If you let the relationship define you, you are no longer who you were when you met.
Be sure to keep working on yourself. Focus on your career and your dreams. This is what she sees in you that is so attractive. Letting go of that and focusing solely on her will not keep her interest.
22. Give her space
Do not smother her. Just as you like to have alone time or time with your friends, give her the same. Let her have time alone. You are both independent people and need space away from each other no matter how much love is there. [Read: Turn offs for women – 25 things that guys do that girls absolutely hate]
23. Don’t get absorbed in something else
A lot of guys have a passion or hobby that they really like doing. It could be playing video games, hunting, work, or going out with his buddies.
Regardless of what it is, don’t let it consume your life too much. If you do, she will feel ignored and definitely lose interest in you and the relationship.
24. Have empathy
Many people in the world are not good at expressing empathy. So, what is empathy? It is putting yourself in another person’s shoes and seeing a situation from their perspective. Women love when a guy has empathy. [Read: How to show empathy and learn to understand someone else’s feelings]
It tells her that you really care and that her point of view is important to you. Don’t get wrapped up in seeing life only from your side. Try to see hers too.
25. Listen to her
Men and women listen differently. Women listen to connect with another person and bond with them. Men listen to solve a problem. So, sometimes she just wants you to be there so she can vent.
She doesn’t need you to solve any of her problems. And that’s good for you because it’s easier to just lend a thoughtful and caring ear to her when she wants to talk. [Read: Conversational narcissist – do you love talking and hate listening?]
26. Put her needs first
Selfishness is the kiss of death in a relationship. We all have needs, and they all matter. So, if you’re not considering what she needs and wants in the relationship, then she will get resentful.
You have to have a balance. The objective is to put her needs at least equal to – if not before – your own. She will appreciate you for it and reciprocate as a result.
27. Talk about the future
When girls are in a relationship, they are always looking to the future. Whereas guys are more living in the moment. But if you’re not thinking and talking about the future with her, she might think you don’t want one. [Read: The 10 stages of a relationship by months that predict your future]
So, if you eventually want marriage and/or kids with her, then tell her! She needs to know that you’re thinking about those things just like her.
28. Be her hero
Contrary to what a lot of feminists say, women want a man to be a man. They secretly *or not so secretly* want you to take care of things so she doesn’t have to.
It can be changing her tire, standing up for her when someone says something disrespectful, or just helping her out with opening a jar, she loves it when you act as her hero. [Read: What makes a man attractive? 38 traits that make women desire you]
29. Do housework
No, housework is not just a woman’s job. You live there too, right? And you make a mess just like her or anyone else living there. She doesn’t want to be your mom and clean up after you.
You have to act as an equal partner. That means cooking, cleaning, vacuuming, and whatever else needs to be done. But don’t wait for her to tell or ask you to do it. Be an adult and take initiative before it gets to a point where she will resent you for not noticing.
30. Fit in with her family
Family is important to most women, and they really want their parents and siblings to like you. Even if you don’t like them very much, you really just need to just fake it and get along with them.
It’s not that difficult. Be friendly, ask them questions, and try to act like you are a part of the group already. It’s never easy to have a relationship when her family doesn’t like you!
[Read: The 16 best ways to show your appreciation for someone you love]
Relationships are so much fun at the start, but it isn’t that hard for both partners to start taking each other for granted. If you want to know how to keep a girl interested, it takes some effort, but it’s well worth it.