33 Most Common Dating Deal Breakers for Women Every Man Must Avoid

Ever wondered what puts off a girl and makes her lose interest in you? Let’s have a look at these dating deal breakers for women.

dating deal breakers

Have you ever wondered what makes a good guy a really great catch for any girl? It’s not easy to recognize common dating deal breakers for women, especially if it’s something you do subconsciously. And it’s even easier to focus on the wrong things, and wonder why your dates aren’t working the way you imagined them to be.

Expectations are a big part of the dating game. All of us have them. And as a guy, you probably have your own list of desires and likes that you’d want to see in the girl you date seriously.

While physical attraction plays the biggest part in the game of attraction for a guy, there are a lot of other things that come to a girl’s mind when she wants to date a guy exclusively.

What is a deal breaker

According to Cambridge dictionary, a “deal breaker” is something that is important enough to prevent you from agreeing to something. For example, when you’re looking to buy a house for your entire family of four and find one with almost every feature that you like, except that it only has one bathroom. That would be the deal breaker that makes you change your mind and not buy the house.

It’s the same for a relationship: A deal breaker is the one red flag that determines this isn’t the one for you. It’s something that you should not choose to ignore or tolerate. [Read: 31 red flags in a guy who’s fake-nice & will only break your heart]

The ideal guy that all girls want

To really appeal to a girl and come across as the perfect knight in shining armor, it’s more often the little things that matter more than the big things that you think make a difference.

[Read: 12 Prince Charming traits that make every girl swoon]

Every girl wants a nice guy. But beyond that, they want a man who can be more than just a friend. So all the nice guys who just got friendzoned, well, there’s a good reason why that happens to you all the time!

[Read: The real secret – Good guys vs. Bad boys and the kind of guys girls really like!]

Now you may assume you’re a great guy because you’ve followed all our pointers for being a great guy to the tee. But if you’re still having a hard time getting the girl of your dreams interested in you for a serious commitment, perhaps it isn’t the good but the bad you need to focus on, and get rid of!

[Read: How to stop being a nice guy who’s always walked over by girls]

33 biggest dating deal breakers for women

While there may be good qualities about you that make you great boyfriend material, there could be a few traits of yours that could be putting off the girls you meet. [Read: 25 qualities that make a guy the perfect boyfriend material]

Here are 33 of the biggest dating deal breakers for women that could raise a red flag in your dating game, and make you appear less than appealing after a date or two.

And these dating deal breakers would probably hold true for you if you don’t have a hard time getting women interested in you, but are having a difficult time keeping her interested in you!

[Read: Husband material: What makes a guy a good life partner?]

1. Bad hygiene

If you’re ungroomed or just plain dirty, it’s obviously something no girl would want to put up with. What’s worse? Bad breath before a first kiss! Uggh!

2. Braggart

Are you the cocky guy who loves talking about how awesome you are, without really having any proof to back up your achievements? Talking about your grand plans and sheer awesomeness is definitely good, but remember not to overdo it. [Read: 16 really important first date tips to charm a girl]

3. Baggage

Do you have an eccentric lifestyle, messed up sleeping habits, or a weird family, perhaps? If there are some big issues that a girl has to deal with just to date you and talk to you, she may think you’re not worth the trouble.

4. Player

Talking like a player may help you snag that first conversation with the girl of your dreams. But if you’re the kind of guy who just wants attention from every girl because you’re a serial cheater or a seasoned player, you’ll only find the girl who’s looking for a one-night stand with you.

5. Control freak

Are you a control freak? Do you always have to know where your girl is or what she’s doing at all times? Do you ask her to dress the way you like? Do you love doing things a particular way, and get annoyed if it’s done any other way?

This unhealthy obsession over control is one of the biggest dating deal breakers for women! [Read: 20 signs you’re a control freak and don’t even know it!]

6. Male chauvinist

Do you think you’re a part of the elite breed because you’re a man? If you are disrespectful towards women, or even show a hint of male chauvinism by behaving like women are beneath you, you can kiss any self-respecting girl’s backside goodbye!

7. Ignorant and adamant

A lot of guys fall plump in this category. They argue on every point and don’t give up even if everyone around them knows this person is wrong.

If you’re the ignorant guy and believe you’re always right and that you win every argument all the time, chances are, people around you are giving up on the argument because they think they’re arguing with an idiot!

8. Wandering eyes

No girl would ever, ever want to date a guy with a lecherous wandering guy. So if you catch yourself gleefully checking out another girl’s blouse or her short skirt in the middle of a date, brace yourself for a dirty stare or worse, the last goodbye. [Read: Men who stare at women and what women actually think of them]

9. Cruelty

This is a dating deal breaker for anyone, not just women. Some guys think they have a great sense of humor when they go picking on other people’s flaws. Perhaps, no one’s ever taught you manners, but that’s the residual trait of you being a bully during your formative years.

If you are cruel and unkind to others around you, or if you take pleasure in others’ misfortunes or flaws, it’s a clear sign that you’re an unhealthy person to be around with.

10. Extremely touchy

Good for you if you’ve snagged a smoking hot date, but try to keep it in your pants for the first hour or so, will you? If you try running your hands against her or try groping her discreetly even when she shows no sign of reciprocation, you’re probably creeping her out!

Always ask for consent before touching someone, not only women. [Read: 13 lusty signs of sexual attraction to watch out for before you touch her]

11. The overly dominating male

Do you think being an alpha male directly translates into a grand display of domination and authority? You may assume that dominating and controlling behavior brings you respect, but in reality, it’ll make you look like an arrogant prick to any girl. [Read: 30 alpha male characteristics of a  real alpha]

12. Unreliability

Would you call yourself a reliably and trustworthy person? If you don’t have respect for time, or can’t be trusted with the simplest of tasks, the girl you date may just find your childish behavior completely inappropriate for a long-term relationship.

[Read: 41 rules to be a gentleman every girl would secretly dream of dating]

13. Addictions

Are you guilty of harboring any uncontrollable addictions? If you’re one who’s addicted to something the girl you’re dating can’t understand or tolerate, it’ll definitely turn out to be a big deal breaker for her in the relationship.

14. Selfish men

Selfishness is a very common dating deal breaker.

As subtle as a selfish guy may try to behave, it’s very easy for everyone else around him to see through his selfish attitude. So if you’re a guy who keeps only your own interests in mind before you do anything, be it plan a date or a day out, you’re risking the chance of losing a great girl even before both of you can get to know each other. [Read: 12 signs you’re being a selfish lover in the relationship]

15. Possessive and jealous

Jealousy and possessiveness may be cute in small measures. But an overdose of jealousy and insecurity is something that’ll push anyone away from you instead of bringing them closer to you. [Read: 17 signs you’re a jealous and possessive guy]

16. Bad manners

While the lack of it may not be a deal breaker, chivalry can definitely be a bonus that can win you quick brownie points. On the other hand though, bad table manners and ungentlemanly behavior will surely be a big put-off to any girl you date. [Read: Chivalry is dead because men are lazy]

17. Clumsy guys

Clumsy and sluggish guys who can’t carry themselves with grace, and worse, don’t know where their body starts or ends while brushing across other people on the street are just a big put-off for anyone, let alone the women they date.

18. Arrogance

Being confident about who you are is a trait that’s definitely seen in a positive light. But if you’re arrogant and vain, conceited and full of yourself, to the point of annoyance, you’ll come across as a braggart and a bore to any girl you meet. [Read: Confident or cocky? 16 subtle signs that split an arrogant & modest man]

19. Social filter

Do you blurt out any thought that comes to your mind without really thinking your thoughts through? Being vulgar and rude, and saying things without thinking may sound funny on the Family Guy, but it’s extremely unfunny and would make you seem like a nutter in real life. [Read: A guide to the right things to say to a girl to make her like you during a conversation]

20. Clingy men

Some guys don’t understand the concept of space and distance between a couple. They’re extremely clingy from the word ‘hello’ and they just come across as creepy weirdos who need to get a life. [Read: 10 things a guy does that makes him a really creepy guy]

21. Abusive men

Don’t ever abuse a girl. Period. Not emotionally, physically, or in any other manner. She will leave you eventually, however hard you try to hold her back.

22. Opinionated men

Don’t be too opinionated and argumentative in your discussions with the girl you like. Communicating with a guy who only wants to convince everyone else that he’s right and the world is wrong, even if it’s for the most trivial of matters, is something no one likes to indulge in. [Read: The 15 worst kinds of toxic relationships you could get into]

23. Timid

Can you take a stand for the woman you love? Are you a man of principles? When you can stand up for the woman you love, and be her strength and support, she’ll only love you more for it. On the other hand, if you’re meek and timid, you’ll only embarrass her. [Read: 15 traits that make a guy a real man!]

24. Compulsive liars

Nobody likes someone who lies through their teeth, especially if it’s something that comes naturally all the time. If the girl you want to date realizes that you’re a liar who finds an excuse to lie even when there’s absolutely no reason to, she’d always be suspicious of you no matter what you say or do. [Read: How to stop lying to yourself and the girl you like]

25. Still living with his parents

If you’re a grown adult who’s still dependent on his parents and can’t take care of himself, it’s time to step up. Women love mature and independent men, not a little boy trapped in a man’s body.

However, it’s common in many cultures, Asian especially, that children stay with their parents, even when they get older and have jobs, so they can take care of their parents. If this is a normal thing for your culture, it’s completely fine, even encouraged.

26. Unemployed

This is touchy, but true. As much as all of us can pretend like we live in an ideal world where money doesn’t matter, you know it does. If you’re not focused in life or don’t have a serious job when everyone else knows exactly what they want out of life, it’s definitely going to impact the relationship negatively.

27. Antiquated views of women

If you’re one of those men who are vocal about their antiquated views of women, such as women should be submissive to men in all aspects of their lives, you need to start educating yourself. Violence against women is rooted in these harmful views, and as long as you’re still known as someone who looks down on women, no woman will ever want you.

28. Pushy about sex

Her body, her choice. If she doesn’t want to have sex with you, there’s nothing you should do about it. Instead of being angry, annoyed, or pushy, be respectful of her decision. Yes, it’s true that two people need to be sexually compatible in order for it to work, so the solution is to go find someone else who matches your needs.

29. Lazy

No matter if you’re lazy about getting a job, exercising, or doing housework, laziness isn’t an attractive trait. In many cases, it’s a dating deal breaker even. Imagine if you’re the breadmaker for the family and you come home to the house being a mess because your unemployed wife has been sleeping all day. You would hate that, wouldn’t you?

Now try to see it from a woman’s point of view. Why would she want to waste her time with a lazy person? [Read: Lazy people: 50 wily ways they manipulate others to work for them]

30. Insecurity

Being humble is different from being insecure. Imagine going into a store to buy a product, then the seller keeps telling you how bad the product is. Would you still buy it? No.

If you can’t even convince yourself that you’re a great partner, how on earth do you expect a woman to do that? So, before you start dating, you must work on self-confidence first. Once you see yourself as this amazing guy, then women will start seeing it as well.

[Read: Insecure attachment: What it is, types, 23 signs & how it affects your life]

31. Doesn’t want to commit in any manner

There’s nothing wrong with not wanting to commit. But if the woman you’re after is a relationship person, this may be a huge deal breaker. [Read: Commitment in a relationship: 27 ways to show it & feel secure in love]

32. Not over ex, still very much in touch with ex

It’s okay if you and your ex broke up in a healthy way and remain friends, but if you’re still obviously not over your ex, maybe work on that before dating again. You can keep lying to yourself, but women can usually tell when a man is still hung up on his ex.

[Read: Does my ex miss me? 23 signs your ex is clearly not over you yet]

33. Fight dirty

Are you the type of man who doesn’t care who he hurts as long as he gets what he wants? Maybe this looks like an attractive trait in movies, it’s definitely not in real life. Nobody likes a man who has to put others down to prove his worthiness. You’ll just come across as petty.

[Read: 25 awesomely bad ways to be a total badass that all girls love!]

Do you have to change the person you really are?

Remember, a girl could still choose to date you even if several of these dating deal breakers are an ingrained part of who you are. But if she dates you, it’s probably because she sees something else in you that’s positive and outweighs the cons of these big dating deal breakers. [Read: 25 qualities in a guy that makes a girl find him sexy and desirable]

If you can take a few moments to understand these 25 biggest dating deal breakers for women, you won’t just be a gentleman and a better man, you’ll also have a woman in your arms who feels immensely lucky to have you! Now isn’t that worth the effort?

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Elizabeth Arthur
A mom of two who’s currently working on a novel, Elizabeth Arthur lives in Cornwall. And when she’s not chasing her boys around the house, she enjoys sittin...
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