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Will My Ex Come Back? 26 Reasons & Signs They Regret Leaving You

You just went through a breakup, and how you are wondering – will my ex come back? While only you can determine that, there are some signs that they could.

Will My Ex Come Back

Haven’t we all wondered, will my ex come back? Many people have, and sometimes it takes them years to move on. People even debate with themselves—wondering whether or not they made the right decision. Of course, sometimes people go back and forth, breaking up one day and getting back together the next.

In the moments where people feel alone, they constantly worry about whether or not their ex will come back to them. Sometimes, it’s because they might have been in a destructive relationship of game playing, but that’s not necessarily the case with everyone.

You may have broken up with your partner or taken a break and realized that your relationship is something worth fighting for.

[Read: Dumper’s regret – The timeline and stages of regret when you leave someone]

Why do people break up?

Every couple is different, however, there are some things that contribute to couples breaking up. And whether or not your ex will come back to you depends on some of these factors.

You may not even know the real reasons you and your ex broke up. So, if you are wondering, “will my ex come back?” then you have to start with examining the real reasons you broke up in the first place.

Here are some common reasons that people break up:

1. Different personalities

As the saying goes, “opposites attract.” But is that really true? Sometimes that can work, but sometimes it just can’t. Let’s say you are an extrovert and love socializing and partying all the time.

If you are in a relationship with an introvert who is a homebody, that probably won’t work out very well. [Read: 16 lessons to recover from a breakup one day at a time and move ahead]

2. Different lifestyles or world views

Maybe one of you is very religious and the other isn’t. Or one of you is conservative and the other is liberal.

There is nothing wrong with having different ways of looking at the world, but if the way you look at it is TOO different from your partner’s, then the chance of long-term survival is pretty low.

3. Finances

You don’t have to be married to fight over finances. Maybe one partner makes more money than the other and starts resenting paying for everything.

Or one person is a saver and the other is a spender. Those types don’t mix well together. So, both people need to be on the same page about how to spend money or else it could lead to a breakup. [Read: How to talk about money with your partner without fighting about it]

4. Sexual incompatibility

Let’s face it – sex is important in a romantic relationship. Sure, some people are asexual, but most people like to have physical intimacy with their partner.

So, if one partner wants to have sex a lot more than the other, this could contribute to deep dissatisfaction on one or both of your sides.

5. Toxicity and conflict

Unfortunately, some people wouldn’t know what a healthy relationship is if it came up and bit them on the you-know-what. If there is constant yelling, fighting, name-calling, hitting, emotional/verbal abuse, then your relationship is toxic.

Constant conflict with your partner is extremely unhealthy. And if you’re wondering, will my ex come back to me, then you might not want to get back together if you were in a toxic relationship. [Read: How to stop thinking about your ex – 21 ways to forget them for good]

6. Cheating

Cheating is part of a toxic relationship. In a loving, healthy relationship, there is no cheating or infidelity of any kind. Yes, people can move on and/or get back together after a partner cheats.

But the chances are, they might do it again. So, cheating is a major contributing factor to a lot of breakups.

7. Falling out of love

When you first meet someone and fall head-over-heels for them, it feels like the love will last forever. But when you are newly in love, your brain is acting as if it is high on cocaine *this is a proven fact*.

But when that chemical in your brain wears off, people could fall out of love if they don’t work to stay together. [Read: The honeymoon phase – How to calculate how long it would last for you]

8. Trust issues

Obviously, if there is cheating involved, then there will be trust issues as a result. But even beyond actual cheating, there are many reasons one partner might not trust the other. It could be gambling, drinking, drugs, financial infidelity, or even a traumatic experience in your past that you emotionally bring to each relationship.

Regardless of where it comes from, trust is the foundation of a healthy relationship. And without it, the couple is probably doomed.

9. Lack of communication

You have to have quality communication – not just quantity. In other words, yelling and screaming is technically “communication,” but it is toxic. The kind of communication you need is the type that involves active listening and empathy.

You both have to feel safe to talk about your problems and work them out together as a team. Without that, the relationship could fall apart quite easily. [Read: How to know if you should break up – 22 signs that will guide you]

10. Growing apart

If you are together for a long time, sometimes people just grow apart. Maybe you met when you were young, but as the years went by, you grew into two totally different people.

And maybe you aren’t compatible with each other anymore, even though you were when you first met. People change – that’s a fact. It’s not a bad thing, but it doesn’t always keep a couple together.

11. Lack of empathy

In order to have a healthy relationship, you BOTH need to have empathy for each other. Empathy is not the same as sympathy.

Empathy is literally being able to mentally and emotionally put yourself into the other person’s shoes and see a situation from their perspective – not just your own. In other words, you can’t be selfish! [Read: How to be more empathetic and 16 steps to make anyone feel heard and understood]

12. Neglect

Sometimes people just get lazy in relationships. They spend too much time playing video games, on social media, on their phones, or watching TV.

Whenever you are engaged in an activity that does not involve your partner, you are neglecting them and the relationship as a whole. Relationships need to have constant love and attention to thrive.

If you are still wondering, will my ex come back to me, you really need to spend some time thinking about the factors above. Which ones were a contributing factor to your breakup?

Are you willing to change? Is your ex willing to change? These are some important questions that need to be answered before you get back together. [Read: Regretting a breakup? 15 signs you should give it another chance]

Now let’s take a look at some signs that your ex may come back.

Will my ex come back?

If you want to give the relationship another try, it’s never too late. And if you’re wondering, will my ex come back, you don’t want to live with the big “what if” question and regret not giving the relationship another shot.

Now, if your partner is abusive, then you should move on and definitely not try to get back with your ex. But if the breakup was based on something else: not enough alone time, needing to find yourself, etc., then why not give it another try?

Who knows what will happen? And if you end up breaking up again, at least there’s no regret. You can get back together with your ex… if you want.

[Read: How to get your ex abck and convince them it’s the right thing to do]

14 clear signs your ex will come back to you

While all couples are different, if you see any of these signs, it might be a good indication that your ex wants to come back to you.

1. You feel it

It might sound a bit “hippy-ish,” but your intuition isn’t lying. If you feel they want to get back together with you, you’re probably right.

Your gut can tell you what’s going on; all you need to do is listen. We’re usually able to feel people who are close to you, and this includes your ex. [Read: When your ex wants you back – Is it what you want and need?]

2. They stay in contact with you 

When we’re over a relationship, we cut all ties. This is the only way we can move on and heal from the breakup. But if your ex is still keeping contact with you, they’re trying to see if they have another chance. There’s no other explanation unless they want to torture you.

3. Your ex wants to spend time with you 

Come on, if this happens, you know what’s going on. Of course, unless they just want to have sex. If that’s the case, they don’t want you back; they want sex – big difference.

But if they want to hang out, watch movies, go for walks, or grab dinner, they’re not looking for just a bang. They want you back. [Read: Why slow and steady is the key when getting back with an ex]

4. They’re nostalgic

When you bump into them, they talk about the good times they shared with you, almost as if they miss those moments. And that’s because they do; they miss you.

The memories they have of you are positive, and now they’re figuring out whether breaking up with you was a good idea in the first place.

5. They ask about you 

You don’t ask about people unless you care about them. If they’re asking your friends about you, they want to know what’s happening in your life. Of course, they’ll try not to be too obvious, but asking about you already blew their cover.

6. They ask if you’re seeing anyone 

Well, you know they wouldn’t be asking you this if they didn’t care. But they’re asking you because they want to know what’s going on.

If you’re single, they’ll make a move. If you’re in a relationship, they’ll probably poke and see how long the relationship has been going on; wagering their odds of getting you back. [Read: 15 reasons why your ex still texts you and stays in touch]

7. The breakup wasn’t concrete 

You decided to go on a “break,” but there was nothing concrete about your breakup. In fact, you didn’t even break up, there was just a long pause. If there was no closure, there’s always a chance for things to start up again.

8. They tell you that they’ve changed 

There may have been some issues you couldn’t work out because you both weren’t able to handle them.

But, time apart has given you the opportunity to grow as people. Your ex has noticed this positive change, and now you two are more mature to enter the relationship again.

9. You both didn’t want to break up

Maybe school was too much, or work was taking over your life. And though you didn’t want to break up, you didn’t see any other option. If you both didn’t want it, but did so out of an external force, then the love you share is still there. That’s the love you can’t forget. [Read: 15 signs your ex isn’t over you and is subtly trying to win you back]

10. They see you’ve changed

When you broke up, it’s possible you weren’t in the best of places. But with some much-needed space apart, they see how much you’ve grown and changed. They see the breakup helped you grow as a person, and now they’re ready to give it another shot.

11. It feels natural to be together 

Whenever you see each other, it just feels right. You can’t explain why, but next to your ex, everything feels secure and comforting.

Your ex also feels the same way and doesn’t hesitate to tell you. If you feel “right” being together, your ex will come back. [Read: How to date your ex again and get second time lucky]

12. You’re both single

Well, this is a pretty important factor. Most people won’t try to get back with their ex if they’re in a relationship. But if you are both single, there’s a high chance they’ll try to weasel their way back to you.

This is the moment where everything is laid out nice and neat. They don’t need to fight your partner or sneak around and send you DMs.

13. You were together for a long time 

Long term relationships always have a high chance of patching things up and reuniting. You were together for a long time, so it’s natural to want to get back together with someone who knows you like the back of their hand. [Read: When does an ex start to miss you? The bittersweet truth you must know]

14. They’re getting close with your family again 

Ah yes, this is a pretty subtle sign your ex will come back to you.

If they’re trying to get close to your family again, it’s not because they love hanging out with your parents. They’re trying to reconnect with the people who are the closest to you in an effort to get you back.

[Read: Does my ex miss me? 23 signs they’re clearly not over you yet]

Do you have an answer to, will my ex come back? You now have all the signs you could possibly want. After reading the signs, what do you think? 

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