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Signs of a Good Relationship: The Lucky 13 that Define a Happy One

Sometimes, we question ourselves, wondering if it’s actually healthy or not. Well, these are the signs of a good relationship.

signs of a good relationship

You’re going to have your fair share of crappy relationships, it’s just a part of growing up. Focus on making sure that your bad relationship doesn’t end up as a permanent thing. Knowing the signs of a good relationship helps you realize how your current relationship makes you feel.

It’s easy to get stuck in our heads and not see what’s really happening in our own lives and the relationships we have. So, take a look at these signs of a good relationship and see if your relationship fits in this. If not, it looks like you’re going to have to do some serious thinking about your choices. [Read: Know what makes a healthy relationship healthy so you can end the shitty ones]

The signs of a good relationship

Don’t get me started on shitty relationships. I used to be the queen of them. It seemed that every single piece of trash on the ground stuck to me. But let’s be honest, I liked the drama. I really liked it.

When you’re in an unhealthy relationship, you’re never bored but that’s not how it should work. You shouldn’t just be with someone because it keeps you entertained.

You should be with someone because they make you feel good and vice versa. Because really who wants to be in a shitty relationship?

#1 You can be yourself around your partner. This is huge. If you can’t be yourself around your partner then who can you be yourself around? Listen, I know you’re thinking it’s going to get better once they get a job or you finish school and get married, but it won’t.

It won’t get better by adding life-changing events into the picture. All it will do is mask it for a short period of time. You need to be able to not shave your legs for weeks or burp in front of them without worrying if they’re going to dump you. [Read: 13 ways toxic love can harm you permanently]

#2 You’re happy, most of the time. You can’t be extremely happy in your relationship all the time, it’s just not realistic. There are going to be some moments where you’re not going to want sex or you’re stressed from family or work, and that will affect the relationship. But on a grand scale, you’re pretty content with your partner, and they’re happy being around you as well. [Read: The steps you can take to tell your partner you’re not happy]

#3 You have sex. I know this sounds shocking, but it’s essential. Are you having sex? But when I mean sex, I don’t mean you’re pushing yourself to get aroused. But are you actually enjoying the sex you’re having together?

If you hear someone tell you that sex isn’t important, ignore them because it is important. It’s not the most important thing, but it symbolizes connection and bonding, something that a healthy couple needs to have.

#4 You trust each other. If you can’t trust your partner then who can you trust? A good relationship develops from a foundation of trust. If you feel that you cannot trust your partner, there’s no point being with them. I know it sounds harsh but it’s not. Trust is everything. If you’re worried they’re going to cheat you, well, it’s time to look for someone new.

#5 You both make decisions. If your partner is the one calling all the shots, then this isn’t a healthy relationship. If anything, it looks like you have no say. You can’t be the only one calling the shots and neither can they. It needs to be mutual.

I’m not only talking about big decisions, but I’m also talking about all decisions whether it’s what movie you’re going to watch to the flavor of chips you’re going to buy. [Read: 10 decisions you should never let your partner make for you]

#6 When there’s a problem, you talk it out. You’re going to have arguments and disagreements about little and big things. We’re only human. But when you do have a problem with something, you’re able to safely talk about it and resolve it.

Sure, you may have a fight about it, but that’s normal. Your problem doesn’t become physical, it’s not based on emotional or mental abuse. You can just talk it out. [Read: How to fix a lack of communication in your relationship]

#7 You feel safe. There are going to be times when you’re camping or sitting on the couch with your partner, and these will be moments where you want and need to feel safe. When you’re with someone, you’re with them for a multitude of reasons with one being that you feel safe with them. You don’t feel like they’re going to hurt you or that anyone else can hurt you. 

#8 You guys have fights. Yeah, I know what you’re thinking, I thought healthy relationships don’t fight? Oh yes, they do. But it’s not about the fights, the sign of whether your relationship is healthy depends on how you recover from the fights. Do you know where the line is and when to apologize? Can you let go? You’re going to fight, but how you end it and how you fight matters.

#9 You both know when to apologize. You may say or do things that aren’t right or your partner doesn’t like. We all have pride, but you need to know when to apologize and recognize that you were wrong. The same goes for your partner. If you both can do this, this is one of the signs of a good relationship that many couples are jealous over. [Read: How to apologize and say sorry to a lover]

#10 You laugh together. Oh god, if you don’t laugh together then it’s going to be a long relationship for you. You need to be able to laugh when they fart because it’s going to happen. When you have giant booger, they’re going to need to giggle as they point it out. That’s just the way good relationships function. If you can’t laugh together, you won’t last.

#11 You don’t feel suffocated. There’s nothing worse than being with someone that makes you feel like you can’t breathe. Not because they’re choking you, well, if they are *in a non-consensual sexual way* then it’s not a healthy relationship.

But if they’re constantly messaging you and you can’t stand it, that’s not healthy communication. Why do they feel the need to suffocate you? [Read: How to fix a smothered relationship and reignite the sparks]

#12  You enjoy spending time with them. If you can’t stand spending more than one hour or two days by their side, let me tell you something, it’s not going to get better once you’re serious with them. You have to enjoy spending time with them.

Of course, there are gonna be moments where you can’t stand the sight of them and that’s fine, but overall, you need to like them. [Read: From crush to companion: The 12 stages of intimacy]

#13 You can see the future with them. This is crucial, but not something that you need to visualize right away. But after spending enough time with them, you need to seriously think about them in your future.

Are they someone you can actually see spending your future with? Do you see yourself happy with them in the future? Things can always change, but deep down, you can figure out what your future would be like with them.

[Read: Understand these 30 things to have a good relationship]

You’d think finding a healthy relationship would be easy, but it’s not. You may have to go through a couple bad ones to learn the signs of a good relationship.

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Natasha Ivanovic
Natasha Ivanovic is an intimacy, dating, and relationship writer best known for her writings on Kiiroo, LovePanky, Post Pravda, and more. She's the creator and ...
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