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Chemistry in Love & My Shitty Experience with Sparks in Love

Do you believe in love chemistry and sparks in love when you like someone? Most people wouldn’t be able to recognize a romantic spark even if it hit them full-on on their face! Matthew Rhodes was one of those men who didn’t believe in chemistry in love until it was a tad too late…

Love Chemistry and Sparks in Love

My tryst with love chemistry

Last night, I was watching this sappy, schmaltzy movie on television. Now I’m still nowhere near my story about sparks in love and chemistry in love, but this is a good start.

I was watching The Princess Diaries II. It was a good movie, and I think Anne Hathaway is really hot, which is why I actually watched the movie in the first place.

Surprisingly, most girls I know don’t think she’s hot, which is weird, but anyways, that’s another story, to be told on another day.

But FYI, in that movie she’s made to hook up with a artsy-gay boyish suitor whom she doesn’t like but is forced to woo, if she has to become the Queen of Genovia. Whoooo! The plot thickens to the echelon of a thick tomato soup.

In one particular scene though, the artsy boy and our cute-as-a-button Princess kiss each other in a moment of haste, to see if there is a chance to find true love chemistry between them.

They kiss. They part. I waited with bated breath, and Anne Hathaway looks at him with a blank deer-in-the-headlights expression and tells him that she couldn’t find that spark!

Sparks in love and love chemistry

Wait a minute now! Whatwusthat? She couldn’t find the spark in love? I hate it when women say that. Why does everything have to revolve around that blooming spark?

Girls get scared of lightning sparks, but need the same when they fall in love? In the movie, the good groom-to-be takes the comment as a gentlemen and tells her that he too didn’t feel the spark in the kiss. And they hug and decide to marry anyways. Seriously, WTF?!

Chemistry in love and my life

Spinning around to my world now, my story has a bit of a cheese twister in it. I liked this girl for several months and we used to hang out. We were great friends, and we had so much in common. She was really hot too, and I, like all guys with really hot friends, had a crush on her.  [Read: Falling in love with a friend]

On the other hand, she, like all hot friends who don’t think along the same lines, didn’t know that!

She was seeing someone already since granny’s years, which was all fine because we weren’t really falling in love fast. We work together in the same office and everything was grand. The months flew, and the two birds, that’s me and her for the less informed, started liking each other. She was in love with her guy, but there was something between us that was really sweet, fun and mushy at the same time.

The plot thickens with the love chemistry

And then came the plot thickening, tear jerking story line. I moved on to another job because of the designation and the pay check. We missed each other and we kept in touch through phone calls, mails, snaps and a bit of text flirting. [Read: How to text flirt with a friend] And then, a few months into the phone calls, we both realized that we liked each other. A lot.

We used to do all the corny little chick-flick stuff like watch the same DVDs at the same time, and call each other during the movie to chat. Long distance dating, baby! We were on a date, long distance, watching the same scenes and talking to each other with popcorn and cola. Now, that’s hi-tech dating, I tell you.

We wanted to meet each other but time just wouldn’t permit. And each time we decided to meet up, there was always something or the other that got in the way. The daily calls shifted to mush and sweet love, and we spent long hours talking to each other. There was mush every day, and on those days when the love was low and the minutes were few, we ended up missing each other all the more.

One fine day earlier this month, we finally decided to meet up and planned the whole day out. It was a movie and coffee date, which was great as it had been several months since we had seen each other. The day before the date, we were all excited and happy to see each other. I wanted to kiss her on the date [Read: How to kiss a girl on the first date], and I mentioned it aloud to her. Her bubbly blush almost had me melting in my couch. At that time, there was nothing in the world to bother me. Life is beautiful. I love my city. O๠il fait bon vivre!

Setting the sparks in love on fire

The next day, as planned, we both skipped work and met up at a mall. We watched a mushy movie and held hands the whole while. We whispered and giggled, and we just cuddled. The perfect way to watch a movie. After the movie, we went to a café and the mush was at an all time high. The sparks in love were ready to explode.

At that point, she was my girlfriend, and I, her boyfriend. There was so much tension between us, and the chemistry in love was incredible. Soon, it was late in the evening, and time for the inevitable parting. I wanted to kiss her, and she knew that, but we never had the opportunity. The movie hall was crowded and she wasn’t very much into public display of affection, not at least with some guy who wasn’t ‘her boyfriend’.

That’s what I presumed anyways. We sat down in my car, and headed to her place. A little something in my head squirmed inside me. Maybe, just maybe, there was still a chance to kiss her. The whole way, my lips were extra-dry and my throat was parched.

I was panicking, and the drive seemed exceptionally short. We got to her place, and she didn’t have her keys. And her sister who was supposed to be home was out. Rats! There isn’t any privacy on the streets anymore.

Hoping for another chance

She phoned her sister and apparently, both of them were supposed to go over to their cousin’s place for dinner that night. She smiled and asked me to drop her off at her cousin’s place. My heart was beating, and fast. I was running out of luck big time. We drove over to her cousin’s place, and thankfully the streets were dark. Little rays of light every now and then.

Good. I shut the engine and held her hand. I licked my lips discreetly. She saw that. And laughed! Ouch!! A few minutes in the car, on a dark street, a lonely one. Sweet! All of a sudden, I saw the bright light of opportunity. This was it, I knew it.  The sparks in love will fly any moment now. I was supposed to kiss her. And if I couldn’t seize this moment, perhaps I would never ever recognize opportunity even if it knocks me down on a railroad!

Sparks in love. Ignite!

I moved in for the kiss, and I wrapped my arms around her. She smiled at me and hugged me. It felt so damn good, I wouldn’t know how to explain it even if I tried. I parted slightly from the hug and kissed her cheeks, and then her neck, and got closer to her lips. And finally, I pressed my lips softly against hers, and there it was, bursts of lightning and flashlights. I was falling down, G-Force was on a hundred fold, and it felt ecstatic.

A few seconds of blind maneuvering later, I opened my eyes. And there she was, staring into me like she just saw a ghost! I looked at her, trying to read her mind. She didn’t seem too happy, but she wasn’t going to slap me either.

“Well…?” I asked her.

“I’m so sorry, but I just didn’t feel the spark!”

The balloons burst. Again and again in slow motion. The waves crashed like a typical movie scene. I felt like a Lilliputian. My respiratory system failed. I lost my voice. What was that? It registered!

Omigawd, what had she just said? I was devastated. I just laughed out though, and so did she. She apologized again and told me she was so sorry, but she just couldn’t feel a thing. Well, another try then?

Nope. She just knew it. It wasn’t going to happen! Awww…. Come on! Why worry about sparks of love when I could get fireworks, then? Nope.

A spark? Now, what the hell was that? No one ever told me anything about sparks in love! But then, we were friends too, so we hugged and I thanked her for a nice time and hit the road. The whole way, all I could think of was the damn spark.  And what it had to do with chemistry in love.

Licking my wounds. Hating sparks.

I got back home and we chatted late at night. We laughed about it, and I pestered her to tell me more about our “special” kiss. She elaborated about not feeling the spark, the chemistry in love when we kissed. She told me that she loved me, and that I was very special and cute, but yet, she just couldn’t connect with me when we kissed.

All of a sudden, at that moment, I felt like I was her gay confidante. The same guy who hangs out, talks about panties and boobie sizes, and yet the girls don’t get attracted to him sexually. What? I couldn’t help but feel like I was the King of Loserville!

Ewww! Wait a second, even ewww sounds gay! I should say “Damn!” We talked for a few hours about our ‘Gay Date’, and life was back to normal. My manhood wasn’t, though. I still felt emasculated. I remembered ‘Bedazzled’, the movie in which Brendan Fraser turns into a gay and kisses his crush, and couldn’t find the spark.

Ouch! A further shrink in manhood. Maybe I just rushed it, that’s what I think. Maybe I should have stuck with the Rule Book, moved in 90% and waited for her to move in the 10% so she could have been ready for it. Yeah? Maybe. That’s all she said. Or maybe I should just wear fluorescent pants and a short navel revealing body-fit silk shirt, and get my right ear pierced. Damn!

The importance of chemistry in love

Life was back to normal again for us. We still talk on phone, and I’ve gotten over that incident. I still try and convince her to forget the fact that we kissed that day. I still blame the café though. Maybe they had laced her drink with some kind of “anti-love spark feeler” powder. [Read: Best places to go on a first date]

She laughs each time I say that. Could she give me another chance? I hope so. We still share our Muah’s and I love you’s on phone. I still don’t know much about sparks in love, but I’m hoping the next time we meet, there would be something like that in her head, well, if that makes her feel better when she kisses me!

Moving on with my life

I’ve gotten over my Gay Boy alter-ego, and I’m starting to feel like a man again. Yeah man!  And we’ve been keeping the mushy and lovey conversations going too. I think she would feel that spark the next time I kiss her. Serious! I’m not going to make the first move though, I’ll stick with my 90% and wait for her 10%. Someday, just someday, I think she’ll take that 10% and kiss me back.

But hey, until then, we’re happy to be there for each other. It’s a good life, and in our personal secret love story [Read: Romantic love stories]that’s loaded with chemistry, she’s my beautiful princess and I, her prince charming!

I still hate sparks in love

But you know what? I still think I’m going to hate that damn thing called Spark! It’s annoying, frustrating, and most of all, it made me feel emasculated, for crying out loud!!! And whatever it is, just as long as she feels it, I’m happy about it.

But thinking aloud, if only I knew what the hell that spark thing was, perhaps our first kiss story may have been really memorable. But it still is. So what’s the moral I see in my story? Ahem… In love, maybe you don’t really need a spark to make a kiss memorable. You just need two people who love each other against all odds, and are willing to give each other a second chance. Who needs sparks in love when you really do want a second chance, eh? What say you?

Chemistry in love and sparks in love may not always reveal itself in an obvious manner. But in those unfortunate moments like first kisses, it vanishes just when you need it most. We sure do know a lot of spark haters out there!

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The editorial team of LovePanky comprises relationship experts and real-life experts that share their experiences and life lessons. If you want the best love ad...