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How to Break a Narcissist’s Heart: Why It’s Almost Impossible to Do

If you’ve ever wondered how to break a narcissist’s heart, you probably picked your brain. The truth is, it’s not really possible.

How to Break a Narcissist's Heart

Unfortunately, we throw around the word narcissist like it’s nothing. In truth, having a true narcissist in your life is troublesome to say the least. Many people wonder how to break a narcissist’s heart, and I’ve been giving this some serious thought.

Honestly, everyone has slight narcissistic traits, and it’s normal to be a little self-centered occasionally. However, a narcissist takes this to a whole other level.

A true narcissist is suffering from a personality disorder called Narcissistic Personality Disorder, or NPD. There is no known cure, and the only way to see any improvement is to undergo cognitive behavioral therapy. Of course, for this type of therapy to work, the participant has to be totally on board. They must understand what their problem is and want to solve it.

A narcissist isn’t likely to ever believe there is anything wrong with them. They’re certainly unlikely to take this type of therapy seriously as a result. Truth be told, there’s no curing a narcissist.

[Read: How to handle a narcissist without falling apart and losing yourself]

If you’ve ever been in a relationship with a narcissist, you’ll know how hard it can be to have someone like this in your life. By nodding along to that sentence, I hope that you managed to break free from the relationship and find someone who actually deserves you. If you’re still in the union, consider leaving. Understand that there is no future, and you really need to get away. Hard? Yes, but not impossible to do. [Read: 16 clear signs you’re deep in a narcissistic relationship]

 How to break a narcissist’s heart

There are many who would argue that a narcissist’s heart is completely broken already. They cover up their total lack of self confidence and low self worth with an ego that is so inflated it can hardly fit into the room. They’re living a lie, basically. However, it’s hard to really believe that when you’ve ever spent a considerable amount of time around a narcissist.

It’s hard to believe that they even have a heart. Their total lack of empathy pushes them to treat people with so little care and respect. So, is it actually possible to cause heartbreak to a true narcissist?

[Read: Narcissist and empath and why they’re a match made in dating hell]

Of course, I shouldn’t generalize and say that every singe narcissist is the same. There are different types and levels of narcissism at play. However, it’s totally impossible to break a narcissist’s heart in the truest sense.

Think back to the last time you felt true heartbreak. It was debilitating, right? You felt pain, loss, and couldn’t stop thinking about the good times. You probably went over everything many times in your mind. And you probably questioned whether you should have done things differently. You probably blamed yourself for a while, before the process wound down and you realized that it was for the best.

I don’t see how a narcissist can experience this.

[Read: How to stop giving the narcissist the attention they crave]

Understanding how to break a narcissist’s heart is really about hurting their ego. But, that doesn’t mean you’ve broken their heart. To experience heartbreak, you need empathy to feel. Narcissists don’t have that.

What do you think? Do you think it’s possible to cause true heartbreak to a narcissist?

As before, it’s less about how to break a narcissist’s heart and more about how to break a narcissist’s ego. That’s pretty easily done, actually. Underneath the bravado, narcissists need a constant stream of validation to make themselves feel good.

They surround themselves with the best of the best, from cell phones to cars, houses to jobs, and the people they have in their lives are always extremely good looking, extremely high powered, very high in social circles, etc. Whoever they allow to be seen by their side is someone who makes them look good. [Read: How to beat a narcissist and win over their game]

Of course, behind the scenes, it’s a totally different story. If someone gets close enough to a narcissist, they won’t experience happiness and joy. In a true and healthy relationship, you should feel happy and safe with your partner or friend, but when you’re with a narcissist you feel the total opposite.

Why stay? Because you can’t leave, or you think you can’t, at least. You’re dependent upon them because they’ve manipulated you into thinking that you can’t function on your own.

[Read: A relationship with a narcissist and what it means to love one]

If you really want to learn how to break a narcissist’s heart think outside of the box, but you first should question whether they have a heart in the same way as you in the first place. If by ‘have a heart’ we mean feelings and empathy, narcissists don’t have a heart. Their ego is their heart, and it’s fragile.

The problem is, by hurting their ego, you will experience backlash. Narcissists do not take kindly to criticism or anyone who questions their superiority. By doing so, you’re likely to be on the receiving end of passive aggressive behavior, manipulation, and cruel retorts. This isn’t likely to go away overnight either. Narcissists don’t forget slights on their ego. [Read: Narcissistic rage and ways to handle the furious backlash from a narcissist]

Is it worth it?

Is it worth it? Ask yourself that.

You’re reading an article about how to break a narcissist’s heart, and that tells me that you’re not feeling in the most loving of moods when it comes to the narcissist in your life. In that case, why not take it as a positive and motivate you to leave?

If you want to break a narcissist’s heart, perhaps the love you had for them is dwindling. Believe it or not, that’s good news.

This isn’t something you can change. A narcissist is not going to suddenly transform into a loving person. Even if they do, it’s an illusion and won’t last. So, why waste your time for a second longer? Use that energy you’ve suddenly developed towards hurting the narcissist in your life, and push it towards your efforts to leave.

Trust me, it will be the single best decision you make.

[Read: Narcissistic victim syndrome: How to get yourself out of a mess]

Many people have tried to learn how to break a narcissist’s heart and failed. It rarely ends well. Don’t put yourself through this and don’t even waste your energy on something which just isn’t going to work. Even if you do manage to put a dent in their armor, it’s not their heart you’re hurting, it’s their ego. What’s the point in that?

It isn’t possible to have a safe, loving, happy, and healthy relationship with a narcissist. You might think you can crack the case and change them, but I’ve heard it all before ten times over. Even I thought it at one point, but I was proven wrong too. [Read: Why do narcissists ignore texts and do the selfish things they do]

The single best thing to do, rather than trying to inflict pain and hurt, is to be the bigger person and make a plan to leave. Walk away. Get out of there. Focus on yourself and the life you deserve. I guarantee the relationship you’re in right now is not serving you well… whether you believe it right now or not.

[Read: What is the worst thing you can do to hurt a narcissist?]

If you’re wondering how to break a narcissist’s heart, stop right there and quit wasting your time. It’s possible to hurt their ego, in fact very possible, but their heart? Nope.

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Nicky Curtis
Nicky Curtis
Having stumbled from one relationship drama to another throughout her 20s, Nicky is now somewhat of a guru in the crazy world of life and love. Telling it how i...
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