The Prince kissed Sleeping Beauty to wake her up from her slumber. But what if Sleeping Beauty is doing the kissing while she’s still asleep?
Have you ever gone to sleep on your bed, only to wake up on the couch with no knowledge of how you got there? Or have you ever had roommates tell you that they saw you walking and tried to talk to you the night before, but you weren’t responding, and you have no recollection of it? You might be sleepwalking. Count yourself fortunate, for it’s a whole different ball game if you’re suffering from sleep sex!
Has it ever happened to you where your partner swears that you initiated sex the night before or that you masturbated beside them, and you have no idea what they are talking about? Or have you ever woken up in another bed, apparently having had sex with another person, with no memory of it whatsoever, add to the fact that your last memory is of lying down on your own bed? You might have sexsomnia.
Sexsomnia is a very bizarre disorder. People who suffer from sexsomnia might not even know that they are suffering from it, or if they do, they are completely clueless about its symptoms, causes, and treatment. It is best to learn everything about sexsomnia as soon as possible, as nocturnal sexual activities can lead into potentially dangerous situations, and even illegal activities. You might force yourself on someone against their wishes without you knowing!
What is sexsomnia?
Sexsomnia is a sleep disorder that results in the sufferer having sexual activity during sleep. Sexual activities can range from masturbation to sexual intercourse. It is one of a set of sleeping disorders called arousal parasomnias. The sufferer is aroused from a deep sleep state by some trigger, but the brain doesn’t fully wake up, resulting in a half-asleep/half-awake state. During an episode of sexsomnia, the sufferer’s eyes are open, and they can stand up and walk.
What are arousal parasomnias?
Arousal parasomnias are sleep disorders that disrupt a person’s normal sleeping process. They are presumed to arise due to abnormal arousal mechanisms in the brain, resulting in the person being awoken without the brain being fully alert or conscious. Arousals happen from the non-dreaming, deep-sleep stages of sleep. Other arousal parasomnias include sleepwalking, sleep talking, night terrors, and sleep paralysis.
Who are at risk?
Studies suggest that sexsomnia affects approximately 8 percent of people with sleep-related disorders. Fortunately, only four percent of the population sleepwalks, so those with sexsomnia are an even smaller percentage. Studies suggest that sexsomnia affects persons past their puberty stage, compared to sleepwalking and sleeptalking that commonly affect children and pre-pubescent teens.
Nonetheless, sexsomnia is not an isolated affliction. Sexsomniacs are shown to suffer from other sleep-related disorders including insomnia, sleep talking and sleep walking in their childhood or even in adulthood. Sexsomnia also tends to run in the family.
Sexsomnia triggers
Sexsomnia’s triggers are similar to those of other sleep disorders. A person suffering from sexsomnia falls asleep as any other person. However, as they enter into deep sleep, something wakes them up, but the brain wakes up only partially. Triggers can be a sudden noise, such as a loud bang or the phone ringing. It can also be triggered by an event, such as an accidental pat or touch.
Causes of sexsomnia
There is no known cause yet for sexsomnia. However, studies suggest that anxiety and stress may have a hand in the frequency of sexsomnia episodes. It can also be prompted by another sleep disorder such as sleep-related epilepsy or sleep apnea. Drinking alcohol and taking sleeping pills are also said to increase the risk of having an episode. However, sexual libido or sexual activity before sleep show no connection to the risk of having a sexsomnia episode during the night.
Effect in men vs. effect in women
Sexsomnia affects men and women differently. Men afflicted with sexsomnia typically stand up or sit up, and act out. They kiss, caress, and fondle another person. They may also initiate sex with their partners. It may be a friend sleeping beside them or in extreme cases, even a stranger. In some cases, the other person is an unwilling partner, resulting to possibility of criminal prosecution.
In women, the effect is different. Women typically just make aroused noises, like they are dreaming of having sex. Sometimes, they also touch their genitalia and masturbate.
Sexsomnia and mild amnesia
Similar to sleep walking or night terrors, the person suffering from sexsomnia has no recollection of the experience when they wake up. They wake up utterly clueless that they had done any sexual activity during the night or had inadvertently forced themselves on someone. However, there is one type of sexsomnia that doesn’t have amnesia as a side effect—that caused by sleep-related epilepsy.
Symptoms of a sexsomnia episode
A person with sexsomnia typically has no clue that they are going to have an episode at any given night. Thus, it is important to recognize the symptoms of an episode as it is happening. Partners of people with sexsomnia observe that sufferers appear to be awake when they perform the sexual act.
However, they are unresponsive to communication such as talking or getting their attention. They also appear glassy-eyed. Once the partner recognizes the signs of a sexsomnia episode, it can be easier to assist the person to wake up.
Treatment for sexsomnia
As yet, there is no known cure for sexsomnia. However, there are ways to adapt to sexsomnia:
#1 Awareness. Familiarize yourself with the causes and triggers of a sexsomnia episode. Keep up to date on recent studies regarding the disorder.
#2 Safe environment. There may be no cure yet, but there are ways to prevent harm to yourself or another person during an episode. If the sexsomnia is triggered by loud sounds, it may be best to wear ear plugs. If you are prone to sleep walking, as well as sleep sex, it may be advisable to have your partner lock the doors, so you won’t get out of the room or the house.
Install alarm systems in doors, windows, and gates to alert others if there is an episode. Some people opt to stay in separate bedrooms to prevent any untoward incidents.
#3 Medical treatment. Sexsomnia is a very rare disorder and as such, there has yet to be a medical cure for it. Some doctors prescribe mild sedatives to lower the risk of sexsomnia. Some doctors also use anti-depressants, as it is shown that the frequency of sexsomnia episodes increase when the person is suffering from anxiety or having trouble sleeping. However, with these options, the patient is closely monitored to ensure that the drugs are working and are not abused.
#4 Community support. When suffering from sexsomnia, it can be hard to deal with the disorder by yourself. You need a support group that understands what you are going through. Enlist the help of your family so they can provide support.
There are also online platforms that allow sexsomniacs to meet and talk about the disorder. Likewise, there are medical centers and clinics that cater exclusively to sleep disorders.
Sexsomnia as a criminal defense
Sexsomnia episodes can cause a lot of harm not only to the patient, but also to the sexual partner. When the partner is unwilling, a criminal prosecution for rape follows.
In Sweden, a man’s conviction for rape was overturned on appeal on September 2014. The man’s defense was sexsomnia—that he was unaware that he was committing rape, because he was still asleep at the time. His appeal was bolstered by the testimony of a doctor specializing in sleep disorders, as well as the testimony of his previous partner.
However, this issue is still highly controversial. Some argue that it can be difficult and nearly impossible to determine whether a person is really having an episode or merely making an excuse. However, medical experts in the field of sleep disorders countered that there are signs when a person is really having an episode, one of which are brain wave patterns that are peculiar to people in REM sleep stage.
[Read: Is it sexomnia or do you just wake up really horny in the middle of the night?]
No matter how bizarre it sounds, sexomnia is a very serious condition that can greatly affect both the sufferer and the people around them. However, no matter how unmanageable it may seem, there is hope in support groups, medical professionals and loved ones who can help the sufferer.
