Attractiveness can sometimes be a mysterious thing. It’s difficult to define! So, if you want to know how to turn someone on, here are some guidelines.
We all want to know how to turn someone on. If you thought you were the only one asking how to turn someone on just by spending time around them or talking to them, well, you’re not alone!
But, turning someone on consists of more than physical attraction. Have you ever seen someone very attractive, but the minute they speak, you’re turned off?
See, attraction is more than just physical appearance. That’s probably not what you want to hear. Of course, it would be so much easier to know all you had to do is wear Gucci sneakers or talk about dogs to turn someone on.
But the thing is, whether you like it or not, we’re emotional beings.
Physical attraction can only do so much. Though physical attraction can work for short-term attraction, if you want to develop something long-term, you must figure out what turns people on emotionally. [Read: How to ask someone if they like you without embarrassing yourself]
There’s no other way around it. If you want to turn someone on, they need an emotional response to your actions. We’re attracted to others who arouse us on a multitude of levels.
Now that you understand the basic requirements of arousal, if you really want to know how to turn someone on, you’ve come to the right place.
Before we go any further, are you looking for specific sexual turn ons only?
If so, here’s what turns guys on sexually – 34 sexual turn ons that arouse men in seconds and what turns a girl on sexually and emotionally – The 25 irresistible traits of sexy men. While these features focus exclusively on sexual turn ons and physical assets, this feature is all about the traits that go beyond just physical attractiveness.
The most important qualities that turn someone on
While everyone has their own preferences for what turns them on, there are some universal qualities that most people like, according to research.
So, before we get into some of the behaviors you can do to catch the object of your affection, consider some of the personal qualities and how many of them you have.
1. Hygiene
This might sound like an obvious thing, but most people like others who keep themselves clean. And being “clean” goes beyond just taking a shower regularly.
For example, if you are a guy with a long bushy beard, you might think it looks cool, but maybe some women find it unhygienic and icky. Or if you have dirt under your long fingernails, that could gross some people out too. [Read: How to be sexy, look sexy and feel sexy without ever trying too hard]
Beyond just your body, people also look to other surroundings too. For example, if you went to a date’s house and it looked like they were a hoarder with dog poop everywhere, would you be turned on by them? Of course not! Or if their car smelled and had rotting food in it? Yuck! Enough said.
2. Sense of humor
Life is serious enough. We all can get bogged down with our own personal woes in life. So, when people come into our lives and they make us laugh, that is a major turn on!
Now, you don’t have to be a professional standup comedian in order to become attractive to other people. But if you can find humor in normal, everyday things, that is a great quality and most people love that.
For example, if you are the type of person who laughs their way through a horror movie, that could be a huge turn on. Or simply not taking themselves or anything else in life too seriously. That is a characteristic that many people find irresistible. [Read: How to be funny – 28 must-know tips to make everyone love your humor]
3. Sound of the voice
There is a reason that most of the voice-overs in a movie trailer or a TV commercial all sound alike. They are usually deep, booming voices. The reason for that is because most people find that sound to be very authoritative, and even downright sexy.
That’s not to say that if you don’t have a sexy voice, you will be unattractive to people and won’t know how to turn someone on. And it’s also not to say that only deep male-sounding voices are desirable. But, there is some sort of animalistic instinct when it comes to people’s voices.
Unfortunately, that’s not something you can control. But it does remain a fact that someone’s voice can help turn other people on. [Read: How to have a sexy voice – 17 ways to make everyone love listening to you]
4. Social skills
We live in the kind of world where charisma and charm are two huge qualities that turn people on. For some reason, a lot of people are attracted to the outgoing type personality. It kind of just pulls people in.
But you don’t need to be a big extrovert in order to have good social skills. If you are comfortable talking to anyone and can fit into any social situation, most people find that quite attractive. But don’t fret if you’re an introvert. Many people like that too! [Read: How to not be boring & get people excited to talk and be around you]
5. Kindness and empathy
Going hand-in-hand with social skills, most people are attracted to kindness and empathy.
Think about it. If you went out on a date with someone and they were rude to your server, would that turn you on? Probably not! Rudeness is not attractive at all.
Empathy is something people love as well. When a person can put themselves in another person’s shoes and see their perspective on life, it’s something that people can really relate to. Especially when that person has empathy for them, that is a huge turn on. [Read: How to be more empathetic and 16 steps to make anyone feel understood]
6. Financial responsibility
Financial responsibility is different than being rich, although it does sound similar to it. You may not have a lot of money, but if you handle it well, then that is attractive.
Let’s say you started dating someone you like, but then you find out they went bankrupt and had their house and car repossessed. And now they are living in their parents’ basement. Would that be an attractive quality? No, probably not to most people.
Financial responsibility indicates that they take personal responsibility in their life in general. You can see it as a result with money, but usually, that extends to other areas of their lives too.
7. Takes an interest in other people
People like other people who take interest in them and their lives.
For example, have you ever been to the doctor or dentist, and every time you see them they seem to remember you? They ask you how your last vacation was or how you’re doing in school? It makes you think, “Oh! Dr. Smith remembers me and likes me!”
The same is true for people in general. If you want to turn someone one, learn to take a genuine interest in other people and their lives, and others will definitely find you attractive. It is a huge turn on when someone finds us interesting. [Read: How to be way more interesting – 21 steps to go from boring to totally loveable!]
8. Positivity and happiness
No one likes to be around a Debbie Downer, right? When you are around people who are always negative, you feel like the life is being sucked out of you. These people are commonly called “Energy Vampires.” Most people try to avoid them at all costs.
On the flip side, if you are always happy and positive, it makes people want to be around you! It’s almost like a drug. You make them feel good, so they want to keep coming back for more. And that is a huge attractive quality to have. [Read: What is an energy vampire? 21 ways to spot them instantly in your life]
How to turn someone on: The 14 most powerful ways to spark the flame
Let’s get started in learning the nuances of how to turn someone on, just with your presence!
1. Engage in conversation
What’s the biggest turn on? When someone is actually engaged in conversation!
This doesn’t mean you’re talking to them while you’re texting at the same time. Being engaged in conversation means having your phone away and your attention completely on this person.
If you want to know how to turn someone on and make them really happy around you, remember that giving someone your attention is a huge turn on. [Read: How to talk to your crush and turn them on to fall for you]
2. Get flirty with the eyes
Most of the way we communicate with each other is done nonverbally. Have you ever looked at someone, and they knew what you wanted to say? That’s nonverbal communication.
If you want know how to turn someone on, tease them with some flirtatious eye contact. Eye contact never fails. [Read: How to make eye contact while making sure you don’t look too creepy]
3. Ask questions on what they find important
If someone is talking to you about a specific subject, it’s important to them. Why would they talk about basketball, for example, unless they enjoy the sport?
If you want to turn them on, ask them questions about the topic they find important. This shows them you’re interested in them.
4. Subtle touching
If you’re too touchy, you run the risk of being suffocating or appearing creepy. The best way to turn someone on without scaring them off is with subtle touching.
Now, keep your hands away from their intimate areas. Instead, lightly touch their waist, lower back, or arms. This will be enough to give them butterflies. [Read: How to flirt by touch and use subtle body language to turn anyone one]
You’ve done the flirty eye contact, but now take it up a notch. If you want to let them know what’s on your mind, give them an intense and prolonged stare.
You know the look. Your eyes will tell them everything they should know… maybe a little bit more. [Read: Eye f*cking – How to master the art and get them to desire you sexually]
6. Give a little sexual touch
Do this only if you BOTH are comfortable touching each other. If this is your first date, take it easy and avoid unnecessary touches.
But if you are vibing and already touching each other, tease them with a gentle smack on their butt or run your hands through their hair. It’ll send shivers up their spine. [Read: When a guy touches you – The different body parts and what they really mean]
7. Point your toes towards them
When you’re talking to someone you’re interested in, point your toes towards them. Shockingly, our brains actually pay attention to people’s foot direction, using it to measure someone’s interest level.
To make them feel appreciated, point your toes towards them while they talk. They’ll subconsciously notice.
8. Don’t be afraid to peacock
In other words, show off a bit. You know, we’re animals at the end of the day.
Just like peacocks, fan your feathers out and show them what you’re all about. Whether you’re a man or woman, don’t be afraid to show yourself off to someone you want to turn on. [Read: What is peacocking and why do we subconsciously do it to impress someone?]
9. The triple head nod
Who would have thought a head nod could turn someone on. But it’s true. In fact, research shows that people will speak three to four times longer if the other person gives three slow head nods.
So, when they finish talking, give three slow head nods. It shows them you want them to continue, and you end up having a deeper conversation. [Read: How to talk to anyone and master the art of a real conversationalist]
10. Give genuine compliment
Let’s be honest; everyone loves compliments. Now, don’t shower them with compliments, that’s not going to turn them on.
Too many compliments will only make them suspicious of your motives. That’s not what you want. If you truly want to give them a compliment, then do it. It’ll come off as genuine, and they’ll appreciate that.
11. Sexting
Ah yes, sexting. This isn’t about flirty eye contact or subtle touching. Sexting is all about words. If you want to get hot and heavy with someone, sext!
Of course, they should give you the stamp of approval. But if they give you the green light, sexting is a great way to get the flame blazing. [Read: 40 sexy and dirty would you rather questions to make anyone horny]
12. Cologne or perfume
Let’s face it – we love good smells! Whether it’s grandma’s apple pie in the oven or the scent of beautiful red roses, our noses give us some good feelings.
Well, cologne and perfume also give you good emotions, too. In fact, a lot of them have pheromones in them, which are hormones that make people horny.
13. Clothing
Everyone has their own “type” and a certain look that they like. One woman may like a man with tattoos on a motorcycle, while another might like a guy in a suit. And a guy might like high heels on a woman, and another might like the athletic look.
Regardless, your clothes can be a turn on. Make sure they’re stylish and clean because that shows that you put in some effort to look good. [Read: How to dress sexy but classy and make them lust without being obvious]
14. How you carry yourself
People tend to be attracted to self-confident people. And you can pretty much tell how someone feels about themselves by how they walk and how they carry themselves.
If a person is confident, then they will walk with their head up high, and project an image that will turn people on.
[Read: Make any conversation sound naughty with emoji sexting]
There’s a lot more to learning how to turn someone on and make them desire you with just your presence. But for starters, if you can master these qualities and use these subtle ways to impress them, there’s a huge chance that you’d get interested, and probably desire you as well.
Now all you need to do learn to take this one step further and learn to seduce them subtly!
Now that you know how to turn someone on in a casual conversation, what are you waiting for? It’s time you used these tips and spark the flame.
Check these out next!
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