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How to Tell If Someone Likes You Without Asking Them Directly

Crushes are exciting but super frustrating! You want to know how to tell if someone likes you, so you can cut to the chase and get on with the good stuff! 

how to tell if someone likes you

More often than not, full-grown adults turn into teenagers when they have a crush. We get friends to bring it up, go out in group settings, and use flirty texts in a joking way. But, you can avoid all of these games by simply learning how to tell if someone likes you.

The truth is that finding out if someone likes you is pretty straightforward if you know how. You don’t have to ask at all, you can just tell.

Hiding your attraction for someone is pretty impossible. Even if you don’t say much, the other signs will give you away. The things you do and say around the person will be in careful consideration of their presence, even subconsciously. [Read: How to know if YOU like someone – 30 signs you should be feeling right now]

The confusions of dating

That confusing time when you realize that you actually really like a person is both exciting and downright terrifying. You wonder if they like you back because they’re not asking you out directly. And you’re not completely familiar with the major signs someone likes you, so you can’t decode their real intentions.

Of course, you want to try and make a move, because let’s face it, you want to move things along! The problem is, what if they don’t feel the same and you’re left red-faced and embarrassed?

Oh, the joys of dating! [Read: What is dating? The full modern day culture guide to dating]

It’s very easy to listen to words and not really focus on the things people are doing. The problem with that is, people lie.

Sorry, it’s true. People also say things to make others feel better. You would be far better not listening to words and instead look more toward the things they can’t help – their physiological signs.

The good news is that when you know what to look for, learning how to tell if someone likes you is actually quite easy. [Read: How to ask someone if they like you without embarrassing yourself]

Why do you want to know?

That might sound like a very obvious question, but it’s important to decode your intentions before you go opening a can of worms you can’t put the lid back on.

Do you like this person? If not, why do you care whether they like you romantically or not?

However, if you do like them, you have to be prepared for the possibility that you won’t get the outcome you desire. We don’t want to be negative here, we just don’t want you to be disappointed if it doesn’t work out.

But, of course, we hope that you do get the answer you want. In that case, you have to be serious about taking things forward, because otherwise you’re just going to be stranded in awkward land. [Read: 28 secret signs to tell if a girl likes you even if she’s playing it cool]

How to tell if someone likes you without asking them directly

If you really want to know if they’re digging you as much as you’re digging them, it’s time to get medical.

Physiological signs are things you just can’t help, the things you do instinctively without trying. These are our instincts, and you can’t avoid them happening in certain situations.

For example, when you’re in a situation that scares you, you’re going to automatically react in a set way. You’re probably going to become nervous, your heart will race, you might go hot, you might start shaking, etc. This is your survival mechanism, and it has evolved from the days of the rather hairy cavepeople.

The same can be said for attraction. When we like something or someone, we automatically show physiological signs of attraction. [Read: How to tell if a guy likes you – 75 signs to instantly know for sure]

So how can you tell if someone likes you? Well, you just have to watch out for a few of these signs, some physiological and some simply behavioral.

1. They gravitate toward you

Even in a group setting, they’ll gravitate toward you. Think of it this way: when you go out and there’s a mixture of people present, you end up hanging out with people you already know and like, or with new people that you’re starting to befriend.

The same goes for attraction. You’re going to gravitate toward that person because you want to spend time with them. [Read: 15 obvious signs of flirting between a guy and a girl]

2. They seem nervous for no specific reason

The best way you can learn how to tell if someone likes you is by whether they seem generally nervous or not. When they talk to you, they may seem shy, or awkward. This is not always the case, but if the person gets shy around you, then it means you make them nervous, in a good way.

They may be trying too hard not to mess anything up, or they may be wondering what to say. They want to get the conversation going because they want to leave a lasting impression on you.

3. They don’t want to be made fun of in front of you

When someone jokes about them around you, they’ll try to derail the friend making the comments.

No one wants to be made fun of in front of someone they’re attracted to, even if it is just a joke. If someone doesn’t legitimately get upset, but jokingly tries to stop the conversation from continuing, then they’re clearly trying to stop their friend from putting them in an awkward position in front of you. [Read: Who are cock blocks and why do they do it?]

4. They’re often in touch with you

They’ll find a reason to text you, whether it be a joke, plans, or even just emojis. When someone likes you, your presence is always welcome.

However, if you’re not around, they’ll still try to get a hold of you. It could be a simple joke, a cute smiley face, or a “I’m bored, what are you doing?” text. Even if it isn’t something important, they’ll make up a reason just to talk to you.

That’s how to tell if someone likes you! [Read: 17 modern dating terms that help you master the evolving dating game]

5. They show a keen interest in you

Rather than asking simple questions like anyone else would, they’ll actually try to get to know you more.

Questions about your education, goals, accomplishments, interests, musical taste, and hobbies are a dead giveaway. We mean, really, who wants to know so much about you all at once? [Read: Does he like you? 18 signs to decode his body language]

6. The “it’s not a date” move

AKA the fake date. They will legitimately invite you out, even if it’s not an actual “date” at first.

It could be them inviting you out to a movie with their friends, or to eat out at a casual place *not a date place*. It could even be them meeting you somewhere, like a local bookstore one of you loves.

None of this classifies as a date, but they’re feeling out whether there’s chemistry, and working their way to asking you out. This is one of the major points on how to tell if someone likes you. [Read: Is it a date or are the two of you just hanging out?]

7. Goody two shoes

They will always be on their best behavior around you. This means all the usual, obnoxious jokes and commentary they may say on a regular basis will be toned down, if not completely avoided, around you.

It isn’t them lying about who they are, it’s just a natural response to someone you’re attracted to. Everyone wants to shine in a good light. The skeletons will come out of the closet eventually, but for now, it’s how to tell if someone likes you!

8. There’s a slightly split personality going on

It will seem like they’re more open around other people, than they are with you. It sounds contradictory, but if they seem more open around other people, then they obviously don’t care what these people think of them, or they already know these other people.

Meanwhile, with you, things are a bit different. This person may care what you have to say, because they’re attracted to you, so they’ll be on their best behavior. [Read: 27 signs he likes you as more than a friend and wants to date you]

9. They notice and do the little things

They will go out of their way to do nice things for you, even small things. For instance, they’ll offer to buy you a drink if you’re hanging out, or they’ll make you something. Maybe they’ll help you set up for an event, if you’re planning one.

Even something as simple as holding a door open can mean so much more coming from someone who’s attracted to you. For sure, they may just be really helpful and polite, but it’s also how to tell if someone likes you. [Read: How to show your appreciation to someone and express your gratitude]

10. They’re clearly in the infatuation stage

This is also the most reliable they will ever be, so enjoy it.

Not to be negative, but realistically, anyone you date may let you down at some point. No one is perfect, and sometimes, your expectations might be a little too high, setting the stage for disappointment.

You’ll both be more reliable during the time before you date to the first 6 months of dating. This person will go out of their way to be there for you, talk to you, spend time with you, help you when you need it, etc. [Read: The talking stage – what it is and how to progress to the next one]

11. There’s plenty of touchy-feely flirting going on

It may happen right at the beginning, or build up to it, but at some point, there will be a ton of flirting. Some people are great at flirting right from the start, and can pull it off in a non-creepy, non-sleazy way. Others like to get to know you first, and build up a hint or two that you like them back, before they flirt.

Either way, flirting is a dead giveaway that they’ve at least considered your chemistry together, and they’re interested to see where it goes. It could be flirting over text, in person, over the phone, or all the above. [Read: 15 signs someone is flirting with you and not just being friendly]

12. They’re on a mission to impress you

One way or another, they will try to impress you. This tends to be a masculine thing, at least that’s what society tells us, but the truth is, women want to impress guys too.

If someone is telling you about their career path, and what they’ve accomplished toward success, then they’re trying to impress you.

They might make a really good drink, or bake a really nice cake, or even show off their intelligence, and general knowledge about a variety of topics. This is certainly up there on how to tell if someone likes you lists. [Read: How to impress your crush]

13. They seek to bond over common ground

You will bond over common ground. It could be music, books, movies, video games, or your love of spaghetti and meatballs. Literally, your common ground can be anything, as long as you’re both passionate about it.

If this person is excited over your mutual love for whatever common ground you have, then there’s a chance they’re attracted to you. [Read: 50 easy questions to test your compatibility instantly]

14. They notice everything

Even if they’re the quiet type, they will still laugh at your antics and sit somewhere close to you at social events.

If a person is attracted to you but they’re really quiet, chances are, they’ll make up for it by sitting somewhere near you, if not right next to you, and observe your dynamic at the event.

They’ll notice everything about you and what’s going on, because they’re so invested in the moment. [Read: How to be better at dating]

15. Listen to the nosey people

Usually, someone will point this person’s behavior out to you, wanting to know what your stance is on the whole situation. Basically, they’re being nosey!

But then again, sometimes the best way to know if someone likes you or not is to just wait for someone else to point it out. It always happens – people notice when there’s a special dynamic forming on the horizon. [Read: Girly things – What your girlfriend’s really gossiping about]

16. They smile a lot around you

It’s hard to be sad and frown around someone you really like. You’re automatically going to smile, because you feel joy, and your face simply can’t help itself! In terms of how to tell if someone likes you, a constant smile is a pretty good measure.

17. They often make eye contact or you notice them staring when you’re not looking

Eye contact is a definite sign of attraction. If you notice that the person you’ve got your eye on literally has their eye on you, especially when they think you’re not looking, you can put it down as a definite ‘yes.’ [Read: The best subtle eye contact flirting moves that always works]

18. Or, they can’t look at you

Confusing, right? Some people are a little shy naturally, or they might suddenly become shy around the person they like.

If you’re noticing that they look at you and then quickly look away, perhaps like they’ve been caught doing something they shouldn’t, that’s how to tell if someone likes you! But, of course, it depends on the person and the way they react to what is a slightly embarrassing situation. [Read: Is he shy or not interested? 26 signs to decode a guy’s behavior]

19. They display open body language … or it might be closed

Yet another completely confusing contradiction is the subject of body language. Generally speaking, if someone likes you and wants you to know about it, their body language will be open and not at all defensive.

This could mean that their arms are by their sides, and not over their body, their shoulders are where they should be and not hunched up out of stress, and they look generally quite relaxed around you. [Read: 15 body language cues a girl gives away if she likes you]

On the flip side, some people *shy types again* may actually display very closed body language around you for no real reason. This means they may cross their arms over their body, as the main example.

The best way to figure it out is to see if they do the same thing with anyone else and that should give you your answer. [Read: How to tell if a shy girl likes you – 22 signs and ways to open her up]

20. Their body is angled toward you

We tend to unknowingly lean towards the things we like, so if you’re noticing that his or her body is angled towards you, and not away from you, that’s a pretty clear sign too.

Even if someone is showing closed body language out of shyness, they will probably still lean into you a little. This won’t be a move that looks forced, it will also be quite subtle, but it’s definitely there. [Read: 18 signs to decode a guy’s body language and read his feelings]

21. Their cheeks are flushed

One of the clearest ways on how to tell if someone likes you is flushed cheeks. It’s not particularly hot, but they’re certainly going a little pink!

The reason for this is thought to be the release of adrenaline, which causes an increase in blood flow. As a result, you get that pink tinge on your cheeks!

22. They might be shaking slightly

Isn’t it great when your mere presence causes someone to lose all control and start shaking a little!

Take it as a compliment, because if you see someone with flushed cheeks who has the slight shakes, it’s a very clear sign that they’re nervous and crushing on you! [Read: Signs a woman is intimidated by you and your assertiveness]

23. They stumble over their words

If someone is stumbling over their words around you and they normally don’t have an issue with it, it’s a clear sign you either terrify them or they like you!

Hopefully, it’s the latter, but it’s a good indicator on whether someone’s crushing or not.

24. They fidget a lot

Another common sign someone likes you is fidgeting. This can be messing with their hair, touching their neck, tugging on their lip, or pulling on their sleeves. It can basically be any type of fidgeting motion that they wouldn’t normally do. [Read: How not to be nervous – 18 calm ways to eliminate nerves instantly]

25. Their pupils dilate

Okay, you’re going to have to look pretty closely to see if this is happening, but when we like someone, our pupils get larger in size.

This can also be a reaction to light, so if you’re in a pretty dark environment, don’t take this is as a certain sign. However, if it’s in conjunction with other signs and it’s a normal lighting kind of situation, you’re in there! [Read: Friendly vs flirty – 12 subtle hints to stop reading the wrong signs]

26. They mirror your posture

The same kind of thing as leaning into you, when we like someone, we tend to mirror their posture and movements to a small degree.

If he or she is standing in a similar way to you, that could be a clear sign on how to tell if someone likes you. [Read: 13 lusty signs of sexual attraction to keep an eye on]

27. They have a strong posture

This is more likely to be a man, but it can sometimes be a woman too. In this case, the posture is strong, because they’re trying to impress you with their strength, and in this case, manliness. A woman could be doing it to exude confidence.

28. Their heart is beating faster

Again, pretty difficult to identify unless you get very close, but if someone likes you, their heart is likely to beat a little faster when you’re around.

Look at their neck if you get the chance, can you visibly see their pulse? You might also notice they’re a little breathless as a result. [Read: Body language and attraction – How it works, 10 signs and how tor recognize it]

29. They might be a little hot or sweaty

Attractive, right? If you’re noticing that they seem a little hotter than is necessary, it could be a clear sign that they’re feeling hot under the collar due to your presence in the room! [Read: What does sexual attraction feel like – Here’s how to know for sure]

30. They’re instinctively protective over you

Exhibiting protective behavior is another sign that someone likes you, because we tend to want to protect those we care about.

This could be sticking up for you verbally, either when you’re around or not around, or it could be stepping into a fight. Either way, it’s a good sign. [Read: How to ask someone if they like you without embarrassing yourself]

31. You feel it

We’re all about intuition. Most of us ignore our gut instinct, but you should never ignore what your body is trying to tell you. If there’s something inside of you saying, “this person likes me,” you’re probably right.

At the same time, if your body is saying, “this person is creepy,” then you’re also right. Don’t deny your feelings.

32. They get rid of the barriers

If you’re sitting together for lunch, they’re going to try to remove any obstacles between you. Whether it’s the salt and pepper shakers or a cup, they’re going to make an open space.

Now, if they don’t do this, it doesn’t mean they don’t like you. It just means you haven’t built a bond yet. [Read: 13 signs of strong physical attraction that reveal a mad attraction]

33. They always laugh at your jokes

And it’s likely that some of your jokes aren’t funny! But when someone likes you, they’ll always laugh at jokes.

If they’re not laughing at your jokes, it shows you they didn’t like the joke. And if they’re into you, they don’t want you to think that.

34. Watch their feet  

This isn’t about having a foot fetish. This may sound a little weird, but if someone likes you, their feet will point in your direction. It’s a subtle sign, but body language is a huge indicator of how someone feels about you.

Whether they’re sitting down or standing, their feet will be pointed in your direction. [Read: 10 clearly noticeable signs of body language attraction]

35. Drunk dial, anyone?

Have you received a drunk dial from them? Come on, you know what that means.

If they’re calling or texting you after a couple of drinks, we think it’s safe to say you’re on their mind. And you know the saying, “drunk man’s words are a sober man’s thoughts.” 

36. They’re all over your social media

Whatever picture you post or story you make, they’re all over it. Social media isn’t just for communication. You can also use it as a way to see who’s watching you *in a non-creepy way*.

If they’re commenting on your posts and sending you private messages, they like you. [Read: How to tell if someone likes you without asking them]

37. Their friends like you

Obviously, their friends know about you. And this is something you should pay attention to. If they’re cracking jokes about the two of you or letting you into their circle, it’s a good sign they have given the thumbs up and approve of you. [Read: These intense signs of chemistry reveal an instant connection]

Putting the signs into context

We know that you’re keen to get a positive answer when learning how to tell if someone likes you, but you do need to be a little cautious. Some signs can be out of context and not be about crushing at all. For instance, if someone laughs at one of your jokes, it might simply mean they found it funny.

If you only notice one or two signs, that could simply be them being friendly. You have to look at the border picture and get a full interpretation of the situation. It’s very easy to try and make a situation into something simply because you want it to be that way.

Basically, you want to have a handful of signs over a period of time. That should give you a general indicator of whether they’re crushing in your direction or not. [Read: 28 signs he wants to make a move and is getting ready to ask you out]

They like you, now what?

So, let’s assume it’s a big ‘yes’ to them liking you. Now what?

If you’re sure they like you and you like them, you need to make a move. That doesn’t mean literally jumping on them or telling them your feelings straight out. It means upping your flirting game and making it pretty obvious you feel the same way.

You could start suggesting you both meet up a little more frequently. Then, when you do, try a few flirty touches or remarks. They should start to pick up on your signals and hopefully they’ll react in kind.

However, at some point, one of you is going to have to just bite the bullet and go for it.

Will it be you? [Read: Where to go on a first date – The 84 best first date ideas ever]

How many signs can you identify?

Remember, just one or two signs doesn’t really tell you a huge amount, but more than a handful, especially when they don’t do it in anyone else’s presence, and you’ve got a very clear answer coming your way!

For sure, asking if they like you directly may lead to some awkwardness, but thankfully we have these signs to fall back on!

After all, when someone likes you, they can’t hide it – they’re programmed to do something about it, even if they only show as tiny hints.

[Read: 23 signs your friend has a crush on you and can’t wait to date you]

So the next time you’re wondering how to tell if someone likes you, look out for the signs! If you like them back, don’t question or ask, just go with the flow of things, and watch your story develop naturally.

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The editorial team of LovePanky comprises relationship experts and real-life experts that share their experiences and life lessons. If you want the best love ad...