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How to Know if Online Dating Is Right for You: Is It Your Match?

It seems like everyone meets online nowadays. But online dating is not right for everyone. Learn how to know if online dating is right for you.

How to Know if Online Dating Is Right for You

Online dating is wonderful for a lot of people. It is time-saving and adds a sense of convenience to the otherwise rather inconvenient world of dating in modern times. But how to know if online dating is right for you is important to understand.

I am just guessing here, but I would imagine that you know at least one couple that met online. And when I say online, that could mean a dating site like eHarmony or a dating app like Tinder or Bumble.

People adore online dating and all it has to offer. With that being said, it is not for everyone. Just like blind dates and speed dating are not for everyone neither is online dating. [Read: Reasons to ditch online dating and go old school]

Have you tried online dating?

Before we get into learning how to know if online dating is right for you, let me ask you this: have you tried online dating? That is a great way to answer this question for yourself.

Have you downloaded an app? Made a decent profile? Have you actually gotten off the app and met anyone in the real world?

If your answer to one or all these questions is no, then try it. I can certainly help you figure out if you should even bother later on in this article. But, the best way to figure out if online dating is right for you is by trying it.

Sure, you could chat with a few people and realize this is not for you. Or you could go on a couple of dates and end up meeting your soulmate… or at least enjoy a good meal. [Read: Why you should meet your online date in person real soon]

Do you enjoy online dating?

For those of you who have tried online dating and are still asking if it is right for you, what is your end goal? Are you looking for a commitment? Is your goal a relationship or marriage? Do you just want to meet people and have fun?

You can get all of these results with online dating. Depending on your preferences, online dating might not be the way to go about it.

For instance, if you are looking to meet people and just enjoy the dating scene, online dating may be ideal for you. It is a great way to meet lots of different people and try new things. And if that is what you enjoy, there is an endless supply of people online dating. [Read: How NOT to online date – What every online dater must avoid doing]

If you are looking for commitment, you can do the same. It may not be as enjoyable. Hoping to meet the “right person”? You may have to weed through a lot of wrong people.

If you get nervous meeting strangers and can’t find the balance between getting to know each other virtually or meeting in real life, online dating will be a struggle for you.

But with that, if you have online dated and enjoyed the process of it, keep doing it. If you have tried it and felt doubtful, uninspired, or just blah about it, you may want to try other dating methods.

Sure online dating is about making matches, but you should be able to enjoy yourself while looking. If you’re not, then it may not be for you. [Read: 14 important do’s and don’ts of online dating]

How to know if online dating is right for you

Whether you have tried online dating or not, and still aren’t quite sure if it is the best method of dating for you, I am here to help.

As someone who has tried online dating on and off for years with some success and some nightmare situations, I hope I can help to guide you in the right direction for you. This is how to know if online dating is right for you.

#1 Are you a social butterfly? Online dating is ideal for those who maybe don’t meet people all the time offline. It is great for people who maybe have a small group of friends, so it is hard to meet new people.

But, if you have a large group of friends and love meeting new people, online dating may not be right for you. Sure, you can never have enough friends, and meeting more can’t hurt, but online dating is a way to open up doors that would otherwise be closed. If all your doors are open already, you may not need more. [Read: 30 effective tips to help you win at online dating]

#2 Are you active and adventurous? This is something I find interesting. Hear me out. I am a pretty lazy person. I hang out at home a lot, so it isn’t easy to meet like-minded people, or at least it won’t be until Netflix creates a dating app. But I digress.

I constantly see people on dating apps saying they are spontaneous, adventurous, and active. If that is true, I wonder why they haven’t met anyone on all these active and spontaneous adventures they go on.

I know I don’t meet people because no one is hanging out in front of my TV, but if you are out doing things all the time, chances are there are tons of people for you to meet that way. [Read: 15 Tinder tips you mustn’t ignore if you ever want a date]

#3 Are you embarrassed or ashamed of online dating? Even though online dating has taken the world by storm, some people still find it embarrassing. The stigma attached to online dating implies anyone who needs the internet to find a date is desperate and has no other options.

Although that is entirely untrue, you may still carry those thoughts around. If you feel like you can’t tell your friends you’re online dating or would want to make up a false story about how you met someone so no one knew it was online, just don’t do it. Either lose those judgments or go back to traditional dating.

#4 Are you too busy to keep up with it? A lot of people think online dating is for people who are too busy to meet people in other ways. Sure, you can swipe and chat while in a meeting, but that doesn’t mean you have time to date.

If you don’t have time to commit to dating offline, what makes you think you will have time to do so online? A lot of online dating apps have 24-hour limits. If you do not interact with a match in 24-hours, it disappears. This weeds out those that aren’t on the app enough to make a real connection.

If you are too busy to use the app, you are probably too busy to put effort into a relationship. [Read: Questions to determine if you’re ready for a relationship]

#5 Are you naturally an anxious person? Do you overthink everything? If so, online dating will be a minefield for you. There is so much that is left unsaid. And if things are going well, working up the nerve to meet offline can be too much for you.

Sure, you can work on your anxiety and be able to meet people, I did. But if you are struggling with anxiety so much you cancel dates regularly, online dating may not be right for you. Instead, ask friends to set you up and go on double dates so you have extra security. [Read: Why online dating can be more terrifying than a horror film]

#6 Do you get attached to people quickly? Online dating is not like high school dating where you meet someone, catch feelings, and that is it, you’re a thing. With online dating, you can talk to someone every day for a week and share all your darkest secrets, and then never hear from them again.

I am not saying this is normal or right in any way. If you tend to get attached to a date or even someone you are just chatting with easily, you have to be able to move on from that to make online dating work. If you get attached quickly, you will go through a lot of heartbreak with online dating. [Read: How to not get attached to someone who will never be good for you]

#7 Can you handle rejection and ghosting? Although online dating offers you immense options for success, it also introduces you to everyday rejection. You can get angry messages from people that disagree with something you said. But, more likely, you can be ghosted regularly.

Online dating leaves responsibility and blame on the floor. If someone doesn’t want to continue speaking to you for any reason, they will do just that with no reason or explanation. If you cannot handle that *I don’t blame you*, online dating is not right for you. [Read: Ghosted after the first date? 13 calm steps to quell the rage]

#8 Do you feel like online dating is fake? This is something I have personally struggled with a lot when it comes to figuring out if online dating is right for me. Online dating is sort of like the comments section of Twitter or YouTube. People can say or do whatever they want because they are hidden behind a screen.

Someone can tell you everything you want to hear but not mean a word of it and not feel bad about lying ’cause they never met you face-to-face. Although most people who use online dating are decent and honest, this fear can really mess up your mindset and make you be negative about the whole process. [Read: How to spot the liars in an online dating site]

#9 Are you blindly swiping? This is a problem with modern online dating. Legit websites like eHarmony give you a questionnaire and match you based on that. This breaks down the thousands of faces you have to swipe through.

But, with dating apps, you are essentially the matchmaker. You have to choose if someone is right for you. You can sit there and swipe on faces with just a small amount of information for hours without ever messaging anyone.

If you just swipe all day, you are not making a real connection. If you fall into that pattern, get off the apps and into the real world of dating. [Read: 16 exciting ways you can meet new people]

#10 Are you hopeful? This is a question you should ask yourself whether you are looking into online dating or any type of dating, honestly. If you are bitter and planning on joining online dating with a cynical mindset, it won’t be right for you.

If you are hopeful, or even neutral, about online dating it could work out great for you.

[Read: Annoyingly common misconceptions about online dating]

You can ask yourself all these questions to learn how to know if online dating is right for you, but even if it doesn’t seem to be, you can always try it out.

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Samantha Ann
My name is Samantha Ann. I am 28 years old. It was always my dream to become an advice columnist, so after years of off and online dating and eventually finding...