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11 Fourth Date Tips to Really Play Your Cards Right

You’ve already gotten through the first three dates. Now what? If you’re not quite sure where to go from here, we’ve got you covered for the fourth date.

fourth date tips

If you’ve been in the dating scene for a while now, chances are that you already have a good idea of what there is to know about dating. By the time you get into the fourth date, you probably have a dating routine going with the person you’re seeing. You’re comfortable with each other and have already agreed, though not explicitly, that you like each other’s company.
After a while, you get to know them better: what they do, where they work, what they do on their free time, and whether or not they’ve been following Game of Thrones *a conversation topic that, by the way, may make or break your relationship potential*. If you’ve played your cards right during the first three dates, then you know what to expect on the fourth date… or do you?
It’s during this critical fourth date that the magic usually happens. And by magic, we mean S-E-X.
So if you haven’t had sex with your date during the fourth date, it could mean a few things. You may need to speed things up because you’re not going anywhere near your date’s pants, or one of you may not be that interested in moving from dating to being in a relationship.
Fourth date tips to play it right
Now, if you’re still looking forward to that fourth date and you want to make it special so that you can hit the home run, then you might want to take a look at these tips.
#1 Preparation is still key. So you’ve gone through three dates already and they’ve all went well. You’re now very comfortable that you can be yourself without feeling too self-conscious. And, of course, it’s obvious that you like each other a lot. However, that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t shave your legs tonight, or that you can go without your breath mints this time. Prepare for the fourth date as if it were your first date and anticipate it with the same excitement. [Read: How to be a good date every single time]
#2 Make it special. Now that you know each other pretty well, you can plan your date based on what he or she likes. If she’s an audiophile, you can take her to a concert or a record store on your date. If he’s into basketball, maybe you can score some tickets so the two of you can watch a live game. [Read: 20 fun and unconventional date ideas you can try]
#3 Maintain your manners. Knowing the other person so well can make you so comfortable that you forget your manners. Even if it’s the fourth date, continue to arrive on time. Let your date choose what they want from the menu, and please don’t fart or pick your nose. If you find that you have common friends, don’t make your whole date night full of gossip. [Read: 20 texting etiquette tips and tricks for classy dating]
#4 Remember: this could be the start of something good. Now that you’re onto the fourth date, don’t take it for granted. While it’s all about first impressions, don’t be hard on your date or yourself. Give each other a chance to make a few boo-boos here and there. Don’t act like a jerk. The person you’re dating may leave a significant mark on your life, and may even be the person you’ll marry and have kids with. So don’t ruin it.
#5 Learn to listen. Don’t make your dates about you. If you don’t know much about your date, make the fourth date the perfect time to listen and ask questions. And just because you know some things about them doesn’t mean it ends there. Continue to get to know them better, listen attentively and genuinely, and show interest in the things that they like. [Read: 10 ways to be a better listener in your relationship]
#6 No need to hurry. Different people have different preferences about how they want dates and relationships to progress. Some can be fast and aggressive, while others prefer to take things slowly. By this time, you already have an idea about how your date prefers to take your relationship. The important thing here, however, is to just go with the flow and don’t do anything that might scare your date away or cause you regret. [Read: Falling in love fast and why you need to slow down]
#7 Have sex by not wanting to have sex. One good strategy for not scaring off your date by coming off as sex-hungry is by making it clear to your date that you’re just not in it for the sex. By letting them know that you like them for much more than their sexual appeal, you’re making them feel comfortable and in control.
#8 Try to go for the lips this time. So while sex doesn’t necessarily have to be a priority at this point, you can show your attraction and affection for your date with a romantic kiss on the lips. However, don’t just do this at any given time. You have to make your first kiss memorable by strategically planning your date and planting that pucker at the perfect moment. Usually, this happens by the end of the date, so be ready for that goodnight kiss. [Read: How to kiss passionately and romantically]
#9 Don’t pressure for sex. If you’ve been kissing and making out on your earlier dates, then you may be progressing at a relatively fast pace and sex may be just around the corner. However, manage your expectations. For some, making out on the first few dates doesn’t necessarily mean that they’re ready to get into bed with you. So just go with the flow and don’t let the sexual tension pressure you to drop your pants.
#10 Be sensitive and respectful. On the fourth date, you want to make sure that you get to know your date so much better to find out if you’re really compatible. Learn to ask the right questions and don’t be too pushy when it comes to things that they don’t feel comfortable sharing. Don’t brag about your sexual exploits, and try to steer clear of talking about your past relationships.
#11 Keep things light. Come on, it’s still just a few dates—it doesn’t mean you’re off to marry each other. So remember to just have fun. Keep the mood light. Inject some well-meaning and witty jokes to keep the atmosphere from being too serious. Don’t be afraid to make mistakes, and don’t try too hard to impress your date. In the end, if it’s meant to be, then it will happen.
So there you have it, the 11 tips to remember before you go out on your fourth date. Now that we’ve got that out of the way, just remember this: just because the kiss or the lay didn’t happen on the fourth date doesn’t mean that a budding relationship with that person is doomed.
[Read: 12 important dating rules for classy men and women]
Remember to manage your expectations, keep an open mind, and just enjoy the company you have with your date.

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Tiffany Grace Reyes
Tiffany is a wordsmith who has played with words ever since her letter-to-the-editor was published nationally at the age of 9. Since then her writing has gone f...
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