Whether you like being in a relationship or not, you might be wondering, are some people meant to be alone? Read on to see if you might be one of them.
Sometimes there are people you meet that just make you ask, are some people meant to be alone? There is this one show on the Discovery Channel where people survive in the wild by themselves.
From one episode to the next you hear about all of their “struggles,” and all you would probably think is, “Well, it was your choice, idiot, who wants to live out in the middle of nowhere?” But, when you get into a fight with just about everyone in your life and think, “now I get that living alone thing.”
If you ask if some people are meant to be alone, you probably don’t mean out in the wilderness, Naked & Afraid, or any of the other dumb things people do for reality shows. You probably ask whether there are some people who just don’t meld right in relationships.
[Read: Unpopular opinions – I really don’t want a relationship anymore!]
Are some people meant to be alone: 18 revealing characteristics
We all know that person on their way out of a third marriage, and we think to ourselves, “Dude, just stay single.” In reality, do those types of people ever learn to get along? Seriously, what is their issue?
We’re not saying that relationships aren’t hard work, but most of them are worthwhile enough to get through the rough spots, even when they get super rough.
If you are the one that can’t seem to find a happy medium or even a happy in a relationship, then yes, there are some people who are meant to be alone. How do you know if you are one of them?
1. You believe that it is better to be right than happy
It takes most people a lot of time in relationships to realize it is not better to be right than happy. A hard lesson to learn. Sometimes it is better to just keep your “rightness” in your head and acquiesce instead of holding out for the win.
If you worry about being right, then you likely spend a good chunk of your time proving it. What a waste of energy. If you can’t give in, you might as well give up finding someone. [Read: The most important ways to stop being a self-centered person]
2. You believe there is no surrender in a battle
If you are a “fight to the death” type of person, then you aren’t going to be in a stable relationship. If all is fair in love and war in your head, you constantly wage battle.
At some point, your partner will get tired of the cheap shots, anything to win attitude, and complete lack of empathy you display.
If you always go in for the kill, you kill any relationship you could potentially have. Relationships are about finding solutions together, not a “me vs. you” mentality.
3. You like things a certain way, period
We all like things a certain way. Some people might like to make the bed and then get out of the shower, put on socks, and make sure that their feet are completely clean when they enter.
But, if their significant other gets off of work and barely has enough time to shower, then they might say what the hell. If you always have to have things a certain way, then you are going to be very tiresome to someone who isn’t as into “the right way” as you. [Read: How to be independent and balance seeking help and being stubborn]
4. What’s yours is ours, what’s mine is mine
If you keep secrets or things to yourself or act selfishly, a relationship is not going to be easy.
You put your own things aside for the good of a relationship, and if you can’t contribute or share, ever, then you are someone who is best solo. [Read: 19 signs you’re being really selfish in the relationship]
5. You aren’t willing to compromise, ever
Compromise is the cornerstone of any good relationship. Trust us, if you are a strong-willed person, then compromising is not a thing that comes naturally. But, it should come.
People never willing to meet someone halfway will always be on the opposite end of a good relationship, which means they might just be meant to stay single. [Read: Compromise in relationships and the art of giving without losing]
6. No one will control you
If you think contributing to a relationship is tantamount to someone “controlling” you, then you might definitely be one of those people who are meant to be alone.
When someone cares about you and your wellbeing, they make suggestions about how you should live your life, where you should be, or require you to join the team effort. If that is equal to control, then don’t let someone control you. But, that negates a successful relationship.
7. You like your “alone” time way more than having any “together” time
If it isn’t just about your belongings, but your finances and time that is all yours, then you are meant to be alone.
We all enjoy some time alone *at least you should for a healthy sense of self*. But, if you enjoy being alone far more than being next to someone, then it is time just to call it and realize that it is okay if you are meant to be alone. [Read: Time apart in a relationship – 21 signs, reasons and how to bring it up]
8. You don’t need anyone and prove it
We all like to be independent and figure things out on our own. If you have a chip on your shoulder and don’t need anyone and prove it time and time again, then there is no reason anyone wants to be in a relationship with you.
There is no “I” in team, so let someone help you once in a while even if you don’t like it for a successful relationship. Or, stay single. Some people prefer to be alone, and that is okay and your choice! [Read: What you need to know for how to live a happy life]
9. Other people’s problems irritate you
If you don’t even want to deal with your own issues, let alone someone else’s, stay single. When you share your life and bed with someone, you share some of yourself, which means being there when they need support or a sounding board.
If you are one of those people who prefer being alone and aren’t interested in being in anyone else’s entanglements, welcome to the club, who does? But, unless you want to be in a club of one, then you should care about someone else’s problems every once in a while.
10. You are controlling
If you think you must control every aspect not just of your life but the person you are with too, then you won’t have a successful and happy relationship.
Controlling people are difficult to live with because they are the only people that make decisions. Sooner or later, the person you are with will want to have a say. When that day comes, if you don’t give in, they will give up on your union. [Read: 20 glaring signs you have a control freak in you]
11. You are a loner, always have been, always will be
If you grew up all on your own and that is the way your role models lived too, then it is hard to turn that part of yourself off. Loners don’t need anyone.
But, to be in a successful relationship, you need someone. If not, they don’t feel invested in the relationship. You don’t have to handle everything alone, that is one of the perks of having someone else in your life. [Read: Why it’s normal to not be interested in dating]
12. You don’t like chaos or company
If the only schedule you want to deal with is your own, then you probably aren’t meant to be in a stable relationship. When you live with someone, you work around not just their schedule but people important in their lives, too.
That means a lot of chaos and interruption in your schedule. If the slightest thing throws you into a tizzy, then you are better off staying on your own and doing your own thing. [Read: Selfishness in relationships – 15 ways to do the right thing]
13. You’re too scared to date anyone
Some people are just very shy and introverted. They think that they want a relationship, but they also secretly hope that Mr. or Ms. Right will just magically walk up to their house and ring the doorbell. But of course, it doesn’t happen that way.
If you’re shy or very introverted, then it’s probably difficult to put yourself out there and date people. You can’t be in a relationship if you don’t do that. So, if meeting people and going on dates makes you feel terrified, then you’re probably one of those people who are meant to be alone.
14. You don’t like answering to anyone
When people are in a relationship, they have to compromise. If one of them wants to make plans on a Saturday night, they have to check with their partner to make sure it’s okay with them. When holidays roll around, you have to make sure you see your family and your significant other’s. [Read: 42 Secrets to being happy single and lessons singledom can teach]
But if you don’t like having to check in with other people or answer to them about what you do, then you might be meant to be single. You might feel like it’s no one’s business what you do with your life, and you don’t want to ask anyone’s “permission.”
15. You feel tied down in a relationship
There is a reason the phrase “my old ball and chain” was created. For some people, being in a relationship feels like they literally do have a ball and chain on their foot. They feel smothered and caged in. They want to find a way out and these people prefer being alone than in a relationship.
So, if that’s how you feel, then you definitely are meant to be alone. Other people feel comforted and loved in a relationship. But if you feel like you want to push the panic button to get out, then you should stay single. [Read: Smothered in a relationship – 37 signs and ways to stop feeling suffocated]
16. Your career is too important to you
Some people love their careers and are workaholics. And that’s okay. It’s wonderful to love your career. But some people really take it to an extreme. If you are so into your career that you spend almost all of your waking hours doing it, then that’s not good for a relationship.
You see, it’s almost like an addiction if that’s what you’re doing. There are only 24 hours in one day, and if you’re in a relationship, then you have to have some time for your significant other. So if you can’t spare any time from you’re career, then maybe you are one of those people that are meant to be alone.
17. You don’t want kids or a family
Not everyone aspires to be married and have kids. In fact, a lot of people don’t even like kids. So, if you look and laugh at all those parents with strollers, diaper bags, and bottles, then you are meant to be alone. [Read: Why am I single? The honest answer, 36 reasons, and excuses we use]
And if you don’t want a family, that’s totally fine. It’s totally your choice, even if other people are pressuring you into it. Acknowledge that you don’t want those things and stay single if it makes you happy.
18. Your friends fulfill your needs
Some people think that in order to feel complete and fulfilled in life that they need to have a “better half.” But ideally, people should feel whole and fulfilled with themselves regardless of their relationship status. [Read: How to deal with being the only single friend in your group]
So, maybe you have a lot of friends and you socialize with them often. They might fulfill your need to be with people. There is no reason for you to have a significant other if you feel that your emotional needs are getting met by friends and family.
Although humans are social creatures by nature for survival, that does not mean we were all meant to pair up for life, or at all. There are some people who are just meant to be alone, and that is okay.
[Read: How to stay single until you’re seriously ready to mingle]
Are some people meant to be alone? Yes, there are definitely some people meant to be alone. If that is you, stop thinking it is a bad thing and embrace it!